Do you hold grudges, or do you practice forgiveness?

[Chazmatazz269]

The question is simple enough, but it seems to be one of those things that compels people to say, “There are two kinds of people in the world…”. So which are you? Do you forgive, or do you hold grudges?

Updates

+1 y

There were a number of excellent responses, folks. So i’m not gonna cherry pick two for MHO. Sorry, but it’s your own fault for offering such thoughtful answers! Ha!

[Sonorous]

I do both. When it comes to specifics, I prefer to approach them on a case-by-case basis. But I can say that I generally practice forgiveness far more frequently than I hold grudges.

If the definition of a grudge just means that someone just isn't being forgiven, then I'm the type of person that believes that holding grudges can be useful & even beneficial if done right. But it's just hard for may people do it right.

However, I can. I am an insanely reasonable person who has good control over my emotions & behavior, so it makes it easier for me. I make sure that I don't let the grudge stress me out to the point where my body is at a health disadvantage. And I'm not the violent type so the thought of harming others is never entertained.

[AmyHew1tt]

It really depends. If I have an argument with my mom or my brother, I try very hard for us to rectify things and move on quickly, because they try with me. But the people who unconsciously did long-lasting damage to me, I find it extremely difficult to forgive them. My dad is emotionally distant, and while I know he loves me I've never really felt it. While I've stopped seeking his attention and interest in my life, it's still left me feeling abandoned on one side, and I go through random periods of just not liking him, generally triggered when I know my mom feels lonely.

I have some ex-friends from years and years ago, who were emotional bullies basically planted every insecurity I have and haven't been able to shake since. I'm constantly working on myself, but for some reason, I still can't bring myself to let it go. Lol, I still have revenge fantasies sometimes.

[Samscott456]

I forgive for myself to move on and let it go. I don’t forgive to make other people feel better. Also just because I forgive doesn’t mean I want you in my life anymore. The only way you would enter my life again is if I see change and consider you worthy back in it which would take time especially if there was a betrayal of some sort. That being said every time I’ve felt wronged by someone there was always a lesson in it for myself. And with that outlook on it it really helps not to hold the grudge. For me it’s been thank you next… lol.

[Tranquility_Lady]

wow thats what people should always do

[Guy13]

The point of Forgiveness is Reconciliation and to know some degree of Peace. Blessed am I with a lighthearted spirit, ability to forgive, and to turn away from things that are harmful to me.

Life is to short down here in the Devil’s Playground to not have fun with the Trolls in our lives or to carry grudges that further clutter our Soul, Mind, and outworked through illness and hate in our Body and its expressions.
That being said….

Because I forgive publicly does not mean I reconcile to an original status with another. I am reconciled to likelihood that “it is what it is” but my heart is at peace with the matter at hand. I reside in the arms of Sovereign God, therefore, my worries are few.

[Cynicaldreamer]

Oh I hold grudges bad. If someone screws me over or upsets me, I don't forget.
I WILL be polite and speak to them if need be (ie: colleagues, family member), but that doesn't mean I like or will respect them as a person.
It just means I have manners while despising their guts! Lol

[dowser19]

Jesus forgives. That's great! That's not my name though. You get 1 shot. That's it. Don't fuck it up. I'll leave you to die on the sidewalk in sub zero weather if you do-after stepping on you and digging through your pockets. My faith in humanity in the Western hemisphere is permanently shot up. So you get 1 chance, that's it.

[Chazmatazz269]

Awfully young to be so jaded already.

[soz11122]

I forgive even the things end bad but I think I never forget, I move on with this forgiveness. I try to be more cautious with other people and think about my past experiences and how we cannot know who people actually are. Holding grudges may turn into something that is harmful to yourself, be more cautious and practice forgiveness...

[Rania05]

I take grudges in while burying them deep down once something related to it comes out while arguing I don't hesitate in bringing it up while reciting every detail so they wouldn't get "confused" that's much better than being resentful all the time being passive indifferent angry is my only way to go with a rather "nice" personality

[Vesuvius87]

This really depends on what the offense was about. If you forgot my b-day but call me the following day then obviously I'm not going to hold grudges. It's easier to forget things when you're very busy.

However, if the offense was about cheating or faking a future with me then get lost. I'll block you forever. You'll never welcome in my life ever again.

[Tranquility_Lady]

Always practice forgiveness because if you don't holding on to that grudge can hurt you than anything else it's better to forgive and forget then holding on to something negative always try to be positive and not negative ahmen God bless you all Jesus loves you! ✝️

[PainusNdeeAnus]

I don’t have the energy to hold a grudge that being said I believe in an eye for an eye and I am extremely petty

a few minutes ago a guy switched lanes with out signaling and I swerved off the road and almost crashed

guess who got a beer bottle thrown at their rear windshield

[Sour-rose]

I'm really trying to practice forgivness and not hold grudges. With other people that is. But someone like my mother... is taking a lot of time and discipline to not bring up a bag of stinky grudge and throw it back in her face.

[blackgaletiger]

I forgive but i don’t forget
Certain actions or behaviours i just can't let go.

[Chazmatazz269]

You don’t think letting go is part of forgiveness?

[GreenLanternI0I]

This type of skill takes time to develop. At first, it took me months to forgive/forget then it took me weeks, then took me days and now it takes me few short hours.

[JayParris]

I don't hold grudges, per se, but I'll cut someone out of my life in a flash. If I thought I knew you, and suddenly find out you're not who you presented yourself to be, I'll treat you like the stranger you are.

[trina_x]

oh i hold grudges
i hate my ex, i would kill him
i hate my ex-friend, i would kill him
just kidding! i settle for making everybody around them hate them

[sheenagwapa]

i'm an extremely forgiving person and always try my utmost best to understand and defend the perdon on my heart and mind but some people are juat too much and doesn't treat me like a human being

[TheVigilantOne]

I never forgive and I never forget, I’m not Jesus nor do I have Alzheimer’s.


2 people that were in my life hurt me really bad and I will never forgive them for what they put me through.

[lightbulb27]

seems I do, I have a hard time letting go of thoughts and experiences. Forgiveness I can do to some degree. It's work...

[Belgie]

I can forgive a lot because holding onto a grudge is like squeezing broken glass just to drip blood on your enemy.

[TrueConfection]

I actively practice forgiveness. I do hold grudges and some are more difficult to get past than others, but I still keep trying.

[dustybiker]

I no longer give out forgiveness as easily. Too much life experience. Doesn’t mean I hold grudges. Just means I’ve moved on without them.

[tzdc21]

Eh... I'm kinda in the middle. It depends on what it was that the other person does and how devastating it was to me. There's a whole bunch of different factors to tie into it for me at least.

[AmeerX]

I am a stuck up. I hold grudges at times especially if I see the other person is not being sorry for what they did.

If the other person shows remorse and regret I forget about it even if it was a grave mistake

[SnowedIn]

I forgive but you also have to work hard to re-earn trust if you've broken it.

[exitseven]

It really takes a lot to get on my shit list but once you are on it, it takes an act of God to get you off it.

[whereismyjohnny]

I don't hold grudges. I forgive, but some things I can't forget.

[Ms_Facesitter]

I can forgive but not forget. You had your chance and i am not trusting you again.

[Tina19]

I don't forgive hod grudge because i don't want to forgive those you caused me harm

[annabananna]

Yea I can hold one if it’s something real bad but I try to forgive

[Darknut3]

i know a woman that still won't be friends with me on facebook all because back in 2015 she found out i had a crush on her. Talk about a waste of time grudge.

[magiusX26]

we are anonymous. we are legion. we never forgive. we never forget. expect us.

[magiusX26]

for anyone wondering. yes i really am a part of anonymous. no i dont hide it. no i dont own one of the masks. no am not a hacker, many of us are not in fact. most of what i do is spot things for others, show support, research things, people, places, information. often the research is on a whim, and 95% of tge time i find some intetesting stuff, usually pretty fast.

[Wiredone]

Yeah I hold grudges. I unfriended several people because they pissed me off.

[collie22]

I want to forgive then I can except some forgiveness :)

[SpokenTruth]

Forgiving and forgetting are two different things.

[Copoku1]

Practicing forgiveness might be hard but it’s better for the forgiver than the forgiven
You feel lighter and happier

[madgoat]

I tend to hold the view that you can't blame someone for being themselves. But it doesn't mean that you approve of who they are and what they do.

[pers0n]

If I see problems I try to solve them. Never create them.

[HippieVeganJewslim]

G-d doesn't forgive the forgiveless. To get forgiveness, you must forgive and apologise for real. I won't forgive my folks as they'd not forgive my quirks.

[Juxtapose]

I will know in my heart if you deserve forgiveness or not. There are plenty of people who I do not forgive but I also do not hold grudges against. I just want them out of my life.

[UniquelyBasic]

I try not to but sometimes I can be too stubborn to let things go.

[LiamJHayden]

I see not point in holding a grudge. And I know that I have been forgiven more than I could ever forgive, so there you go.

[Googlemyahoo]

If there's a legitimate reason for the grudge no I will hold it.

[Agape93]

Ohhhh I hold grudges for decades. I don't forgive

[ZenJen444]

If I don't like you then I don't like you lol. it's that simple. I'm not entitled to like nor forgive anyone.

[AngryCarl]

I practice forgiveness but you must show remorse.

[AsaKyo]

I hold grudges until I don't care anymore

[AdithyaR]

Depends on what the person did.

[thegooglepixelfan]

Is can deponds but I try not to.

[Jccowen77]

I hold grudges. I shouldn't but I do.

[msc545]

I hold long, serious grudges.

[Songomatic]

I don't practice forgivenes. It is just Apathy.

[whistlingwh0res]

When you do drug everything is forgivable?

[jimmy2]

Always forgiveness

[Chazmatazz269]

Is that natural for you or do you have to work at it?

[jimmy2]

My wife did 20 times

[jimmy2]

So now I know how to forgive

[Joker_]

I don't have any grudges

[Iron_Man]

I forgive