As an adult, do you ever wake up and need a hug or emotional support?

Question

Datboi65 · Accepted Answer

My first answer back in a while. Here we go!

I think people have different ways of dealing with stress. Some people run away from it, other people lean into it. I happen to be of the latter.

I'm blessed to have been raised by two iron-willed parents with a workaholic attitude and a tough nature. I attribute my mental strength and resilience to them. I'm more of the lone wolf type, which means I enjoy challenges and I like working alone. People think I'm a masochist at times lol. As far as "breaking points" I can only recall two times where I was on the verge of collapse. Both times I didn't seek much external support/motivation, and both times I pulled through and found my rhythm back.

The first was on my applications to medical school, and the second was when my uncle and then classmate died within one year of each other (RIP to both). My grades dipped for a little as I was just unhappy, but I pushed myself back to where I was. I'm really proud of myself for that achievement.

I'm usually more of the mentor/friend that people need, but I'm not one who likes to feel the need for other people. That doesn't mean I play hero or that I'm there for everyone, only people I care about and those that are genuine whom I can help without an inconvenience to myself, not people outside of my reach or people who are shallow and transactional. I was hardened from my childhood, and now I subconsciously associate vulnerability with weakness (in myself but not in other people) which of course has the potential for self-toxicity and over self-reliance, but I have found myself more and more willing to accept that, as in the few times I've asked for help I have usually been disappointed.

I found out that when it comes to things that are outside of my control, there really is no point stressing out over them. Things will happen the way they're intended to be. I'm religious, so I believe everything was destined to happen the way it did, good or bad. Sometimes there are things you perceive as "bad" that may be good for you and you'll find out later in the story why they were good, and vice versa. For things within my control however, I try to step up a system with predictions (set of goals), a routine that can be adjusted and a plan of action. I check at the end of every week if I hit my weekly targets, and make slight adjustments if I didn't. I then check at the end of the semester if I hit my goals or not, and how close I was if I didn't. I squeeze in 5 work outs a week, stay in touch with family and go out with my friends once a week.

Stress is part of the game, I lean into it to get stuff done. Too much stress creates anxiety, but too little stress creates procrastination. A hug works for some people, but for me it's taking a shower, brushing my teeth and getting read to conquer my day, because like the great David Goggins says:

"THEY DON'T KNOW ME SON 😤".

Navy seal David Goggins running a Marathon

WhiteSteve · Accepted Answer

I’m actually usually in a good mood unless something is directly on fire. Any of the ongoing problems I do have won’t really be solved or lessened by a hug, and I’m kind of a lone wolf when it comes to times when I am down, I just like to trudge through it on my own. I HATE sympathetic attention or being the object of pity, that’s one of my “things”, haha, so anyone acknowledging that I’m not feeling my best is added unpleasantness.

Not trying to be like I’m “too tough” for a hug or emotional support or anything like that, but for whatever reason I’ve just always been supremely uncomfortable receiving sympathy. I’m a pretty big hugger, I just prefer happy hugs😝

Although just this morning I had a VERY RARE dream (or at least a rarely remembered one), one of those ones where it feels real. I went downstairs in the pitch dark and as I hit the light I realized my old man was right there walking into the same room, and we startled each other. I was just like “WHOA….. dang, man, you scared the hell outta me! Hahaha…” but then I see his eyes roll back and he collapsed, maybe dead. So I had a brief moment of horror and woke up right then. I guess I wouldn’t have turned down a hug, but what I really needed was just to be assured that I had been dreaming and was awake now. But I could see the day had broken already, so was like “definitely a dream, it wouldn’t be pitch black at 7:30 AM” lmao

sage2021 · Accepted Answer

Yes, I remember waking up in the middle of the night when my boyfriend was living with me. I would tell him "I'm scared". "Scared of what"? "Everything!"
And I would need to be held really tight.
God I miss him!
RIP My Love 💌

dustybiker2 · Accepted Answer

I think men that answer no have never had it offered so they don't know what they're missing. I can often tell when someone is off their usual self (having a rough day) through text online and will ask if they see okay.

ohsheeT · Answer

I have before I still do it's not only that it's even deeper than that I wake up wanting to please somebody I wake up money to be so sensual to take somebody to the Moon to feel something so hot so passionate so sensual and deep and then I go back to sleep and haven't even a better dream but yes I have

bobalife · Answer

I had a similar question a while ago. But yes, there are definitely moments where I am going through a very hard time and all I need is a hug...

It is natural that we want and need emotional support, but it will look different to each person and not everyone feels they are allowed to get that support. So, they may have a mindset to be strong on their own and not ask for it. It is okay to ask for support <3

Maybe_Maybe_not · Answer

I would probably tell you I won't need it, as I am culturally programmed to tell this tale and parade with this script. Now, when I am meeting a person brave enough to actually demonstrate empathy, then I'd probably ditch my tale for the truth

Mwolf · Answer

No, I'm not touchy feely. As an introvert I just hermit and withdraw when things are at it's worst. Usually keep things to myself and few selected people I reveal my personal life or struggles, I mask an insane amount of shit physically and mentally. I'm good at hiding it, and I don't like people asking about it so I don't let it show and maintain my regular novel, bold, independent, blunt, and sarcastic self.

Anonymous · Answer

Would it matter?😆

Nope. At some point in this life you come to terms with while there are people in your life that care about you. That only extends so far. At the end of the day, you really can only depend on yourself and God almighty. I see no utility in a hug

Anonymous · Answer

Nope. Not at all. A majority of men will say no because we really have no one to go to. Men’s feelings tend to be ignored. Just like these questions asking men do you often get compliments. No a majority of us don’t. Women will claim up n down no that’s not true I compliment my man all the time, but the vast majority of us don’t. Many of us have learned no one is coming to save us. Either get up and do something about it or feel sorry for yourself.

Unit1 · Answer

That's why we have these items 😁

SugarSugarplum · Answer

I don't know about "need", but damn, sometimes it sure would be welcome.

Chevy1_kb · Answer

He's very much so sometimes am just happy waking up knowing Uma is alive her and her kids are healthy but sometimes I do like wee hug in the morning if I'm alone but mostly from her am happy single shagging ma ex

electromagnetic · Answer

From my bed, yeah.  My partner and I hug before he leaves for work some days. Although it may not be for emotional support specifically, they do make the start of a day brighter.

Redwolf4821 · Answer

Yes. A hug may not solve my problems but that human contact feels wonderful enough to be like "ok let's get our shit together and rock this. And hugs are healthy for people and people in this day are often touch starved. I've gone over to my situationships for hugs because he literally gives some of the best hugs I've had.

Goahead76 · Answer

No, not really. I hope your back pain isn't making your life unbearable though. That I could understand definitely needing some sympathy or support.

MemeSupreme · Answer

bro i need sleep fuck hugs or emotional support

lightbulb27 · Answer

yea, I like to be babied every now and then.  wife gives that. God gives me some, that's the idea right?

PeachyPie93 · Answer

I think majority of people do but we live in a world where most people just have to deal with that shit alone.

hanabunny · Answer

There's definitely days when I could use one and I try to hug my friends as much as possible and give emotional support too

DeeDeeDeVour · Answer

If I wake up after having a nightmare or horrible dream, a hug or other sort of emotional support would be much appreciated.

clampfan101 · Answer

If so not long enough to remember the feeling. I almost never remember my dreams, and the few times I do I forget them momentarily. I wish I could record them and keep ones I liked to watch from a mobile perspective.

TonyMetal___86 · Answer

Yes i do but i don't have a girlfriend or a wife so i'll just convince myself with positive thoughts, does something that makes me happy to ignore those needs!

Agape93 · Answer

When I was growing up, yeah. As an adult I don't even bother entertaining the concept

Nikki1989 · Answer

I never say no to a hug but never for emotional support reasons.

CubaPirate · Answer

Not these days I'm over my mental health problems thankfully

FarmBoy13 · Answer

Plenty of times in life when I need a hug……. But right after I wake up I need to poop and there is a good chance that if someone squeezes me it’s happening in my bed

Skfisllw · Answer

I am 24 years old and i need it. Sometimes i hug with liar frenemy people because maybe something will change by embracing. So this is the life for all of us.

paledreams · Answer

I tend to hug every now and then or I just have a nice comfortable shower :)

V_Injector · Answer

Only a complete f***** ass pussy would need or want that shit.

Kelly6 · Answer

@kittygosmeoww yes I daily need a hug when I wake up.

Staximus · Answer

Yeah, then I tell myself "get the fuck up and go to work"

Iron_Man · Answer

Yes, of course especially now I’m all by myself now.

Bklynbadboy12 · Answer

Yes I think everybody does. I miss having a friend that give good hugs

Anonymous · Answer

Yes I think everybody does. Many know it's not coming and maybe never will.

MyBrainsInsaneReign · Answer

Honestly I don't usually want to deal with people at all until around noon or so.

stratford · Answer

No, but I often need something else...

HumbleDragon · Answer

Oh yeah that’s needed no matter what age you are

snowboarder720 · Answer

All the god damn time.

Anonymous · Answer

Yes. Recently I found myself crying and naked due to recent things happened to me.

Lowiu · Answer

Yes and then I turn lver to my fiancee for that

avery58 · Answer

After just waking up? Not really

D_Bone_Steak · Answer

What kind of adult pussy would need that kind of bullshit? Serious question... because I fee you do know the answer to that.

whiskeyontherocks · Answer

No honestly I don’t like any form of attention at this point

legalboxers · Answer

could really go for one now...

DJB72 · Answer

Pretty much every day

BCRanger10 · Answer

No. It's called "being an adult" for a reason.

exitseven · Answer

no, but its nice when it happens.

LiamJHayden · Answer

I probably would if my cat were not here.

Crazzyyworld · Answer

I need sex food and money

Olgaaa22 · Answer

Always but not always have I someone

sirderpsalot123 · Answer

No lol

MatureMan40 · Answer

Sometimes since everyone has feelings...

4ngelic · Answer

sometimes

Miristheiss · Answer

No. That sounds super weak.

dsrice071966 · Answer

Yes, I have wanted a hug before.

DishLady · Answer

Yeah, it happens.

NathanDavis · Answer

a snuggle

WhitneySnow · Answer

Yes!

PatKirby · Answer

Rarely.

call_me_scar · Answer

Yeah sometimes

smahala1991 · Answer

Constantly

jahaims · Answer

Nope

DtMe89 · Answer

Not really, no

As an adult, do you ever wake up and need a hug or emotional support?

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Do you feel like you need a hug? Do you ever feel like giving someone a hug?

As an adult, do you ever wake up and need a hug or emotional support?

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Do you feel like you need a hug? Do you ever feel like giving someone a hug?

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