What does digging deep and actually doing self exploration really mean?

[Justneedtokno]

What are those self discovery questions that people need to learn in order to find out about themselves. I feel like a lot of people go on these self-healing journeys and find themselves stuck because they don’t exactly know where to start. What are you tackling when you’ve tackled some major things already such as grief.

[CupcakeTheDestroyer]

People say that self-exploration and healing is great, and the results are definitely better for everyone involved but it means you have to make 3 lists and ask yourself 3 questions:
You make the first list by asking yourself “What is wrong with me?” And list out every answer as things to address one at a time (some can be multiple without realizing and that’s great but it’s best to move slow at the start). And as you go down that list, you have to figure out if the something wrong is something bad you need to change or if it’s something that you think is bad because at one point in your life someone or something hurt you enough that you decided to push it into a specific box. Then, you have to ask where each thing that’s wrong came from and feel the pain of it all over again and process it in a way you didn’t before and it SUCKS. It hurts, and it’s not fun and you cry — A LOT. And then when you’re done crying, you breathe, and you come back to yourself, and you move on to the next thing on the list. This part of the self-exploration process can be difficult to do alone so having a therapist or even a non-judgmental friend can help.
When you’re done with that, you start on the second list by asking “Who am I?” And you list out everything you are, good, bad, and neutral. You examine everything with microscope, metaphorically speaking, and this is usually also aided by the assistance of a friend or therapist as you go over everything and put together the pieces of who you are currently.
The third list you make comes from asking yourself “Who do I want to be?” And you list out all those traits that you want to see in yourself. You go down the list and you find our how close you are to being that person, and it’s important to do these lists and ask these questions in this order because the work of the first list is going to help you get to where you need to be in order to have all the tools you need to get to where you want to be and you get there one step at a time.
And this is the part where most people kind of get lost: after you do all of that work, and you get to be who you want to be, the goal posts move and you gotta do it all over again. It’s easier with each attempt, so the second time doesn’t hurt as much as the first but you are constantly changing, and the process of doing so is never linear. You’ll have moments where you’ll do things you’ regret, or things you won’t be proud of, but it’s all a part of the process and as much as it sucks you gotta keep moving. That’s kinda what I’ve learned it is anyway.

[Nikki1989]

Self-awareness and self-reflection.

[Lynx122]

For me in the beginning it was just a lot of fear admitting to yourself that you have fear is a big step and then working through different traumas why do you have this fear and then finding the event that caused it and that usually helps disolve this one fear that's affecting your behavior. And then there's still a lot more. There's deeper areas of your mind that can't be as easily accessed and there are some traumas in there too that affect us but we can't resolve that as easily. I think at this point it's just about being self aware to the highest degree that you can and then what's important to you. Our relationships with other people are the most affected by our past so you just have to ask yourself who you are who you want to be and what about your behavior is maybe pushing other people away or stopping you from living the life you want. If you have that self awareness it is possible to change things. If it's just how much you put yourself in social situations or changing your approach to other people.

maybe you've already passed this or you have different issues I don't know. But my experience is it's mostly a lot of work and used up time and doing things that you don't want to do or are hard and in the end it's not like a miracle happens. I do think it's worth it but you don't really get to experience the direct comparison of how your life would be if you never put in that effort so it's just something you have to do more because it's truly important to you and not because you're hoping for a grand reward from it :)

I don't know exactly if I answered your question. If I missed some aspect of what you wanted to know I'll gladly answer it if you reply and ask it :)

[LiamS95]

It's mostly about going over your past with a fine tooth comb and is a mental/moral process anyone with no moral values probably could never do it as then there is no beginning or end so to speak, sorry I'm not doing a good job explaining what I have experienced but I do know what you mean.

[Ironco]

You don't have to travel anywhere, just really listen to the voice in your head and be self aware of what you are going through. And what your voice is telling you.

Yes, sometimes you won't like what you hear, but deal with it and moves on as quickly as you can.

Good luck

[Anonymous]

Tis is the question Democrats are asking themselves for the last two weeks.