I'm I a dick for telling my friend his life won't change unless he takes risk?

[Anonymous]

My friend has been unemployed for almost 2 years and lives in a very small city with almost no jobs other than a few minimum jobs: fast food, dishwasher, one Walmart, etc. I keep telling him to drive to the city to find a job since their more opportunities there. It would cost him $40 a day road trip once he finds a job, but he says that's way too much to spend on gas and refuses to take the risk. My friend Dakota is just waiting to get lucky. Is hoping someone can find him a job near his town doing hard labor or anything that isn't minimum wage work. Dakota does own me 2k. I told him I won't be loaning him anymore money, and he needs to learn how to take risks. He currently makes 1500 from government help with only 300 to 400 left for gas and food.

We live in Location ab Canada

[HollyK21]

$40 a day (and that’s give or take, depending on traffic or rush hour, it could cost him more or less gas), 5x a week if he’s working full time is about 200, times that by 4, it’ll cost him around 800 a month in gas. Potentially more, hopefully less, but that’s not the most feasible option for everyone especially once you include living expenses, like rent, utilities, phone and whatever else.


He first has to save the money to take those trips out to the city in order to find a job. He may have to go back for follow up interviews, training (depending on the field he enters), or whatever else and that’s before even getting his first check. That check, maybe even the first 2 or 3, would likely go towards reimbursing all those other charges, which includes paying you back that 2k (maybe not a lump sum but the payments would have to start).


He isn’t guaranteed a good job out there, or even a job at all, rendering those risky job hunting trips to the city and money invested in doing so wasted. He’d be back at square one, with less cash in his pocket, still owing you and whoever else money. All this to say, you aren’t a dick for your suggestion but you have to factor in why doing such a thing is easier said than done.

[midnightmoon05]

That shear real friends do/say.
I have learned, they won’t change.
but don’t lend (give them) money anymore. Things won’t change.

[slatyb]

No, that's just honesty. And you are right to refuse to loan any more money.

Have you watched "Clerks"?

[ProbablyClueless]

I don't think you were being a dick. That's good advice.

[Summeroflove]

Well it’s better to make money then make nothing. Look, you probably care about your friend some people need the truth. But… You can’t make him do anything sone people just find what’s called… Excuses

[joehypo1]

Living life without risk is like never living at all

[seeyounexttuesday]

What the fuck is wrong with him? He needs to grow up.