Are you 100% you, or does it depend on the room?

Question

I don't know the older I get, the more I crave realness. Not the polished, performative kind just the raw, honest kind of being. But let’s be real, it’s not always easy. Society rewards conformity... and being fully yourself can be risky. So I’m asking... Are you 100% you, or does it depend on the room? Let’s talk about it. No filters, no shame.

( Exclude the workplace if you need to lol...)

OneViewpoint · Accepted Answer

I have limited social guardrails and ability to moderate my mouth. But generally, what you get are my unfiltered thoughts.

It just seems like a massive waste of time to try to appease assholes or essentially lie to people to avoid hurting their feelings to save yourself from conflict. Why do those things?

If I'm not on the same page as you and we're never gonna be on the same page, I want you gone. As fast as possible. If you're just plain stupid. If you have massive insecurities and can't handle the truth. If you're stuck in some religious cult. If you want me to tell you it's OK to be a whining asshole to get your boyfriend to conform to your idea of perfection. You're probably not gonna want to hear my thoughts.

I literally don't care who's in the room. I'll say it to strangers I just met, friends, business associates, family, anyone. I suck at faking it!

Massageman · Accepted Answer

There are some areas (of life, of space/area, of work) where we must reign ourselves in a bit, but I am as authentic as any situation allows me to be.

Flash forward to a "grandpa joke" I recently heard - - - "I'm at the stage in my life where "lifetime in prison" means less and less to me each year. And at least I'll have a home, food , and free medical care." I guess as an older adult, we ARE able to be more blunt and "get away with it".

Let us hope that with our age ALSO comes the wisdom to know when to hush up.

lyrem04 · Accepted Answer

Honestly, no, I’m not always fully myself. I hold back because I’m afraid of being vulnerable and overthink everything, like if what I say will make someone uncomfortable. With strangers, I get it, but with my closest friends, I just want to be real and share what matters without fear. The problem is, I don’t think anyone truly knows the real me. I’ve been friends with some for almost 10 years, and while we know a lot, the most important parts of me stay hidden. The only person I can truly be me with is my sister, cuz she gets me. But I can’t imagine showing that side to my friends. Maybe that’s on me, though. I’m scared to open up, not sure how to start, and afraid of making things awkward. Thing is at the same time I never conform, so
I’m always me, but not 100% me which is not cool:/.

Simslover92 · Accepted Answer

The older I get, the more I really don't care what people think about me. I'm 100% myself. I've become more authentic in how I dress, how I speak, and how I present myself. I really think it's important to embrace your uniqueness because a lot of people are trying so hard to be anything but themselves which is a shame.

Maybe_Maybe_not · Answer

I'd question the meaning of a 100% you, me or anyone else.  Because, while I believe that core identity is somehow a fixed state, I also believe it can't be properly defined, not within, not by me nor by the outside observer. Plus, I see the silhouette of identity fluctuating, absorbing or rejecting things constantly, depending on events we experience, perceptions we get. As such I see motion, freezing this motion and calling this a 100% me seems untrue, but tempting. I'm not exactly the same I was 20, 10 or even 5 years ago, so who am I? Even if I am or have been 100% me, at times, was I able to judge myself accurately?

DishLady · Answer

LOL. @7phoenix7 I think we both know it depends on the room. You stay "the real you" and some folks will always LOVE that while others will always HATE it. in my opinion, "slow and steady wins the race," so don't go chasing qualities that you think other people want to see if it's not true to who you are and genuinely want to be. (It's a lesson I had to learn the hard way in my late teens/early 20s, but a lot of young people in their 20s-30s are learning it now, possibly bc more young folks are taking more time for school and stuff -- and also had formative social years "interrupted" by COVID -- whereas the "GenX" crowd had to grow up a bit quicker.)

Apulu_backagain · Answer

Oh my god this is such a deep question. Earlier it depended on the room because I hated everything about me and basically had no personality. It's so much better now, I feel more confident and am more secure and have my own unique essence. I still have a long way to go but it's so much better than before, I'm not a people pleaser now.

DJB72 · Answer

I tend to not use a mask these days - which often ends up with some oversensitive jerk blocking me.

I'm 53. I don't want or need anyone's approval. I grew up with Windsor Davies in "It Ain't Half Hot Mum" as the Sgt Major screaming "Oh dear! How sad! NEVER MIND!!!" At his platoon/concert party - which may account for a lot of my FAFO attitude.

Rub some dirt on it. You don't have a "right" to not be offended. Nobody gives a fuck about not offending me. Every opinion offends someone.

So Jesus is Lord and if you don't like it, FAFO!

glennos89 · Answer

Except for my time before adulthood I have always tried to be myself completely. I know I'm not perfect and probably never will be perfect but I find it important to work on myself. I try to look at my own imperfections by owning up for the mistakes I make and I always reflect on myself to see if I made the right choices. If not I will own up to them and apologize for it and learn from my mistakes.

I don't really care wether people like me or not. I'm not going to pretend to be someone else then I am. I'm totally myself and people can take it or leave it. I just try to be the best version of myself and I try to become a better person as time goes by.

Personally in my opinion the most beautiful people are truly themselves and they are peacefull and kind people helping others wherever they can

MikeTheBartender · Answer

I would say I'm around 95% now, when I was building my career and building businesses, I was probably 0%, I definitely had to act more professional in certain environments than I actually am in my home environment. Although I guess the odd thing was I became a little bit of what I was pretending to be as far as all the business stuff. But I'm at the point in my life where I'm ready to sell that shit off and go back to being more chill.

WhiteThought · Answer

I am always myself, but I am hardly ever at 100%. It does depend on where I am and who is there. I am not trying to get into a fight every single time someone doesn't like what I have to say. I do not want to lose my job over being myself. It definitely has consequences, but I don't have many friends because I tend to be very blunt, and come off as cold hearted to some people.

Crimsyjo · Answer

Yeah I can't exactly be the real me. Its too taboo and wild for most people to understand and not appropriate in a lot of situations like work. But more me than should does still leak out. I'm not ashamed of my cougar lifestyle so it's hard to contain myself from revealing it.

midnightmoon05 · Answer

Definitely me myself and I… that’s why I offend many. I m blunt and honest. I don’t know how to lie.
if I knew how to lie like just a little I wouldn’t have gotten into some trouble. Like written up by mg old boss! 🤬

PeachyPie93 · Answer

I used to be more myself when I was younger but the longer time goes on I get bashed into the mould people want me to be. I have gone through so many negative experiences with people so now I usually just wear a mask and pretend to be nice and agreeable. No point being open with others. I generally hate other people, but I know how to work them and get them on my side. Online I tend to be an asshole just to release my frustration with everyone around me.

Joshydavid25 · Answer

It sort of does depend on the room I am usually around 70% myself most times.. Even though I wanted to be an actor, and I can present a polished version of myself, the real self comes out sooner or later.. Either that or I remain reserved.. I usually get mixed results when I'm 100%.. Either kinda funny, weird, or corny.. LOL..

Phoenix98 · Answer

I'm usually 100% me like 90% of the time I don't have a filter and I speak my mind and am truthful even of it hurts or offends. Because sweet lies do nothing to help anyone.

CupcakeTheDestroyer · Answer

I’ve been 100% me from a young age, which is probably why I’ve never had a lot of friends. I never had any desire to cut myself down or shrink myself in the name of companionship. If being myself means I’m alone, I’m happy with my own company.

exitseven · Answer

I behave myself in the classroom. I think it is important to just teach the subject and not inject politics into it. It is a good thing I teach computer science but occasionally we talk about security and censorship.

dragoblack · Answer

I stopped giving a f*ck in jr high about what people expect me to be like and decided to just do what i enjoy and dress the way i want. It honestly feels great to dress how i wish, and do what makes me happy... it also gets rid of a lot of social insecurities. Only downsides is you make a lot of enemies due to their jealousy & unwillingness to take the that step, due to their wanting to fit in, and because people have a harder time relating to you, dating becomes harder.

ohsheeT · Answer

I like being me so that's who I am I do like to laugh and have fun so it's me so I will say 95 to 98 % I think the only time any one would see me being 100% is if something happen and it was Serious and things have to happen right now.

MemeSupreme · Answer

yeah bc im sleep deprived most of the time  i just don't care enough lol

AydenHazor · Answer

It very much depends on the room. I've got a close group of friends who get the real, unfiltered me. Every else gets me heavily masked lol

Panthero80 · Answer

I think for everyone it depends on the room, at least to a certain extent. For example, my friends and I are less likely to discuss a woman's "rack" in front of my mom.

Shiprex · Answer

I work where I have to "Play a role" to a degree but trying to keep that up is too demanding so I play the role of me only more outgoing and enthusiastic than when I am socialising. I don't have multiple faces I put on though

Kingofkings1992 · Answer

More so than anyone else on the face of this planet. I stopped wearing social masks 10+ years ago. When I was a teenager/ early 20’s, I made an effort for people to like me. Now, as a 33 year old man, I know life is short and people mostly suck (not the good kind of suck). So yes, everyone will get 100% the real me. If you like me, great 👍. If you don’t, IDGAF. 🤷‍♂️

Miah06 · Answer

I'm me. Love me. like me dislike me hate me. But it's me you gonna feel that way about.

BLP11520 · Answer

Is liberating being yourself and not caring what people think anymore not being obnoxious but just being yourself. as I get older, I find out how much you can like in a person❤️

Agape93 · Answer

Depends. I'm always me, but I have to often hide it with smiles, bright eyes and easy conversation, to make people comfortable around me, less uneasy.

ProbablyClueless · Answer

I try to keep things consistent. I've found that people respect me more when I'm real. And as long as I'm not being antagonistic to people, they seem to enjoy the consistency.

sirderpsalot123 · Answer

I don't know lol I don't talk to most people

Nikki1989 · Answer

I can't be 100% me all the time. I wouldn't have the career I have for one thing.

Jay-_- · Answer

I'm like 85% me you'll get 100% me when whoever wants to know me hangs with me one on one. For sure depends the room, unless I know you aren't stuck up and humorless then yea I'll go 100%.

serious · Answer

No, I am 100% myself. Real and original, irrespective to the consequences.

KittygosMeoWW · Answer

I used to be genuine and silly with everyone when I was younger as I get older I’m more protective of who I allow to know me and experience my true self.

LiamJHayden · Answer

On my personal life, 100%. In business I bite my tongue for clients.

Anonymous · Answer

Different versions of myself, who are all still very much me, just under different circumstances.

Babygirl_S · Answer

I don’t enter rooms I don’t like so yes I’m 100% me.

DrPepper12 · Answer

I'm an international spy so I blend in anywhere

nawtee_me · Answer

I am me all of the way. I am an open book so just ask but that also means I say what is on my mind too.

fish5505_87 · Answer

Unfortunately, I try, but it depends on the room! I continue working on myself, because I like my inner self!

WilliamPamer446 · Answer

Depends on room But I'll always be myself

Anonymous · Answer

I'm Gemini, of course it depends on the room :P

Professor-college · Answer

Well I tried to be myself because that's the only person thats the only way I know how to be like... Bean real is probably one of the most important things

RedInnocent69 · Answer

It definitely depends on the room, and my mood

WhitneySnow · Answer

I am like 90% me

sage2021 · Answer

Nope I'm 100%. I mean why not?

Gaylordslav · Answer

Im the same guy at home as I am in public

PaleDale · Answer

If I'm alone or alone with a special person

AndrésC64 · Answer

I wish I knew. 🫤

Are you 100% you, or does it depend on the room?

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