Do quiet guys ever get girls?

[Anonymous]

Quiet is usually perceived as a bad thing in this society. You are seen as weak and insecure and have no personality.

The thing is, I'm quiet. But I'm also self-confident, people have told me I'm funny, and I have a lot of good things going on that I'm excited about and I'm excited about my future.

However, it seems to me that girls generally like the loud guys. It's not my goal in life to get girls (though they are a nice bonus), but do you think quiet guys never get any girls?

[kkgirl21]

I personally like shy guys, as long as I also find them physically attractive. I definitely do not like loud guys or guys who talk a lot, because I feel these types are either not very intelligent,or they are a player, or just sweet talkers who are nice to pretty much any one or any girl they find decent looking, or basically want attention due to their insecurity (all these types are a turn off for me). Many girls such as myself actually like the shy or underrated guy, because often these guys will understand the value of the girl better and will treat them and make them feel more special. Being quite can be a good thing if you know how to work it to your advantage, but there are some things that you do need to have or do to get girls interested.

You say that you are confident and funny, so work that to your advantage when talking one on one with a girl. Also, the first tip I have for any guys wanting to step up their game is to make yourself look good physically. This doesn't mean going to the gym everyday (although that certainly helps). It means having a nice haircut and dressing well, and the best way to do that is to figure out what styles girls like. Ask your sister or your cousin or your friend, any girl around your age that you feel comfortable with and can trust to help you with that. And don't be too resistant to changing your style a bit, the results might surprise you.

I definitely do not like loud guys or guys who talk a lot, because I feel these types are either not very intelligent, or they are the player type (both types are a turn off for me).

That being said, I once dated a guy I was originally into, but could not take it more then a few dates because he was so quite he could not hold up a conversation. I tried to get him to talk a bit more and even joked about "feeling like I am having a conversation with myself" when we went out for dinner, but never really got anywhere. Not only was it very boring (and exhausting to constantly try to come up with a topic he would want to talk about), but he came off as very dull the 4 or 5 times I went out with him.

[Asker]

I use the funny thing to my advantage in one-on-one conversations. The only problem with conversation is that I find that if I talk about things like movies, music, books and all that, I end up in friend zone. The girls think that's interesting, but not romantically so. Instead, I've started to just tease them and let them talk about whatever they want most of the time.

[Sinkar12345]

I know this post is very old, but being quiet and shy are two completely different things. They can and they often exist at the same time, however they are not the same.

Shy is someone who is 'afraid' to speak because he thinks he is stupid, will be judged, thinks he is not attractive enough, doesn't have the confidence bla bla.

Quiet is someone who is usually introverted. Difference is he is quiet (does not talk a lot) not because he is forced to, cuz he has low confidence bla bla, but simply because he doesn't feel the need to. He is not forced to do it, he doesn't feel uncomfortable or anything like that.

[sassyg1rl]

My boyfriend is very quiet. He is introverted. I don't see it as a bad thing; when he speaks up his words have much more value than other people's.

The girls "like the loud guys" because they get their attention. But if you are smart, witty, and relatively handsome, chances are several girls have their eyes on you already.

Good luck!

[Asker]

I'm definitely smart and witty. The handsome part...not so much.

[orangasing]

if you are not handsome, shy and queit, your chance iwth girl is really low

[PlayFair]

I notice quiet guys. You seem cool. Like there's so much more substance beneath the surface anyway. I don't think quiet is a bad thing. I think those who are afraid to speak up when it is needed are weak. I know quiet people who are very confident. Over generalizing and making quick judgements is risky.

[Asker]

the problem is that in order to know that there's substance beneath, you need to get to know the person. And, being quiet, I tend to get ignored. Or even worse, picked on when a loudmouth needs someone picked on (of course, I say something back.).

[PlayFair]

The people who don't notice you are the shallow ones you probably wouldn't get along with anyway.

[Anonymous]

Generally.

Generally loud people meet up with loud people and start ravaging and tearing each other apart just as fast as they got together. It's quite a fun thing to watch from the outside, really.

If you ask me, go for the quieter girls. Not to mention, start liking a quieter girl, and not just because she's a girl who actually started talking to you.

[Asker]

yeah, my problem was that one of these loud girls showed me a LOT of attention, made it seem like I was the greatest guy ever. Of course, she wouldn't date me and then ended up chasing an equally loud guy who was just like me, but louder.

[Opinion Owner]

Once a really loud girl figured I was the best guy in the world based on like 2 hours of knowing me, honestly I was repulsed. But I'm quite quiet myself, and now I've been in a relationship for a year with an equally quiet girl. She's awesome, by the way. :P

[onlyaguy]

Yes, quiet guys do get girls. I was very shy and quiet in high school and college and I hooked up with my share of girls.

[Asker]

how, though? Don't you tend to get ignored? Or are you good-looking enough that you don't?

[onlyaguy]

I don't know, I guess so.

[dubstep]

most girls are straight.

[onlyaguy]

So what's your point, dubstep?

[WavyCherry]

Yes, they do. I'm not a good example because my boyfriend is reasonably loud and rowdy.

My brother is really quiet, funny, and girls like him. The girl that he's dating says that she likes when he makes jokes that she doesn't always see them coming because he's not a loudmouth. He really only talks when he has something important to say.

[Anonymous]

Yes, they do.

But people still want some encouraging romantic gestures, such as flirting. Otherwise, they think you're not interested. Also, you have to show SOME of yourself, otherwise nobody knows anything about you. You have to have some conversations, etc ... to get to know people.

[Asker]

yeah, I can converse and flirt. I'm so much better at that then before. Problem is, if I converse with them it generally doesn't make them come back for more because they talk to the louder guys more.

[Opinion Owner]

Some girls like outgoing guys. Not all of them. Don't get discouraged by what a few girls did.

[Anonymous]

my preppy beautiful and adorable daughter is definitely into the quiet nerdy funny shy guys. She usually ends up with a guy who always thinks she's too good for them which causes them to be insecure and mess things up, but her taste hasn't changed any. she'll find one that's confident enough for her one day and she'll be blissful lol she absolutely hates loud obnoxious guys she dated one very early on and that was plenty for her she was over it.

[HandofHeart]

In the end the quiet guy wins. Most girls aren't mature enough for a quiet guy, but they eventually get there.

[Anonymous]

Quiet guys get girls. I'm similar to how you described and I could get just about any girl I wanted. Don't buy into all that other stuff

[Asker]

but are you good-looking? I'm average, maybe even slightly below.

[Opinion Owner]

Honestly? I wear glasses and I've been called a nerd countless times. I've been told I'm handsome. Hey I don't question it, I just jot down numbers lol

[pheabs]

girls love quiet guys :)

at least I do ! :)

[Anonymous]

yes, nice guys finish last;)

[Asker]

well, remember, I'm not talking about "nice" guys. I'm just talking about quiet guys. You're assuming that quiet guys are pushovers, as does the rest of the population, when they could not be pushovers and just quiet.

[sleepypanda]

Personally I love quiet guys.