He ended the date with a handshake? what does this mean?

[Mysty211]

Hey so I met up with this guy I've been speaking to for 2months. He gave me a handshake when we met. He's 27 I'm 20.

We planned on going ice skating we met up in this shopping centre. He said he was nervous about ice skating we walked over to the ice rink to watch it for a while , he wasn't sure about it. I persuaded him to go but when we went the next session wasn't for another 2 hours so we left it and he joked about how he was lucky he didn't have to skate. When we met at the start he'd told me he had to see his mate after as his girlfriend had just broken up with him.. We walked around was gonna get food but decided to get coffee. We paid for ourselves walked around the town a bit talking and he said we'd walk down towards his car . We were near his car and he said he's gonna head off an see his mate the one who'd girlfriend just broke up with him . He gave me a handshake and said it was nice meeting you keep in touch or he might have say I'll keep in touch . I just said yeah it was nice and said bye. I don't know if that was good or not? What should I do next? I don't know if he's interested or not since we didn't kiss we talked a lot an got on okay but I have no clue how it went. Intitially before we met up he'd asked me out a few times but I was busy the times he asked. I asked him out for this one as he said he wanted to try ice skating even though he was worried about.

I can't tell if he was interested or not. I know when we spoke online he wasn't that forward when asking me out it was more casual. Should I text him or wait? I may have been slightly nervous so I don't know if I came across as interested I was distant at times. He'd said his friend got back from Germany and his girlfriend had broken up with him and he had to check that he was okay. He said this a few times.

Updates

+1 y

I had a nice time, we should do it again maybe try out ice skating next time if you're not too nervous?" Or just leave it as" I had a nice time, we should do it again maybe try out ice skating next time" Maybe add in (hope your friend was okay)

Updates

+1 y

I might text him saying

"I had a nice time on Saturday, we should meet up again - I hope your friend was okay?"

Updates

+1 y

Will I contact him today or tomorrow? the date was yesterday,

[markml]

I'm going to go completely against the negative answers here...

First dates can be awkward (speaking as a guy who can sometimes be awkward on first dates), but that doesn't means that they're a disaster and you should give up hope just because you didn't reach a certain base on that date.

Patience, grasshopper.

I can't promise he likes you, but I can tell you that there's a good chance he was also trying to assess if you were interested in him. Not every guy moves so fast. I can't see myself kissing a girl on a first date, regardless of how much I was in to her. I wouldn't give a handshake either because I think that's dumb, but it's entirely possible that the guy doesn't know that. Also, him saying, "It was nice meeting you," is kind of a rhetorical response. It's not negative. It just means you don't know what else to say.

I've certainly said that before.

He might have said that because he knows the date sucked, but that doesn't mean he's not into you. It doesn't mean he is either, of course. Also, the thing about him being concerned about his friend seems fairly legit. And you should have teased him about not wanting to ice skate.

What you do now is fairly simple. You text him and say something like, "Hey, even though we didn't get to ice skate, I still enjoyed your company."

That's better than saying "I had a nice time" because honestly you were hoping for more. You enjoyed being with him but not the date so much.

You can optionally add "Looking forward to seeing you again soon" if you want to give additional encouragement, but I would stop short of specifically asking him out again, since you need to see if he will take initiative,

[Mysty211]

Oh right so I should ask him out? with the "I had a nice time on Saturday, we should meet up again - I hope your friend was okay?"

or could I use the "Hey, even though we didn't get to ice skate, I still enjoyed your company. I hope your friend was okay"

Will I send it today Sunday or Monday? the date was Saturday.

[Mysty211]

or "Hey, even though we didn't get to ice skate, I still enjoyed your company on Saturday.I hope your friend was okay?"

I was thinking of waiting til tomorrow Monday to contact him.

[Mysty211]

or "Hey, even though we didn't get to ice skate, I still enjoyed your company on Saturday.I hope your friend was okay. We should meet up again?"

[harveykinkle]

If you're interested who cares what we all think. Ask him out :) The worst he can say is no.

[Mysty211]

I sent the guy the message "Hey, even though we didn't get to ice skate I still enjoyed your company, had a good time. I hope your friend was okay?"

hasn't replied or hasn't yet.

[markml]

Sorry for not replying sooner. I think you sent the right message, whether he replies or not. If he doesn't reply in a few days, might be best to just move on. You can lead a horse to the water but you can't make it drink. You've done your part. I hope for the best, and sorry if it doesn't go your way.

[Mysty211]

I think I may have let nerves get the better of me thinking back he did seem to do more of the talking, I held back a little too much and couldn't think of anything to say and my last boyfriend we got too close too quickly so I think I was trying too be confident but acting distant trying no to get to close and ended up giving a bad impression of myself. Is it worth mentioning that I was nervous? an came across badly? or something? I don't feel I was myself

[markml]

This is all possible, but I personally don't believe in first impressions. And I think if a guy gives up because of one lousy date, he probably wasn't worth it. I know I certainly feel that way about girls who give up on me too quickly. If he doesn't bother replying in a few days, he's probably not worth it.

[Mysty211]

Yeah that's true I guess I'd seem clingy or desperate if I did send anything. Maybe he just didn't like me anyway. We were talking for very long. Maybe he didn't treat me that right during the date/meet either other guys I've met have been nicer.

[Mysty211]

Just thinking he may have done more of the talking .

"May have been a little nervous on the meet a bit closed off an came a across way different ti usual just wasn't myself that day"

"Hope I didn't come across badly on the meet was a bit nervous on the meet maybe a bit closed off just wasn't really myself that day"

"I was a little nervous on the meet just a lot different the way I usually am a bit closed off, Just wasn't really myself that day. Not usually like that"

[Mysty211]

Would any of those be okay or anything better? an maybe add in "Hey hows things?" at the start.

n it's up to him if he responds or not. I don't think I put too much effort in at the time. Or is the a better message.

[markml]

He still hasn't replied to your first message where you said you enjoyed his company and specifically asked how his friend is doing?

Well give him another day or two I guess. He should at least say his friend is okay.

I don't think you should apologize to him for not being yourself. I mean, I guess it probably won't do any harm in the long run, but I don't think it will help either. At this point, he either thinks you're worth it or he doesn't. Maybe he met another girl. I don't know.

[Mysty211]

Yeah will I give it to the end of the week then send one of those messages? which one seems the best? or if there's a better way to phrase it?

[markml]

The ""Hope I didn't come across badly on the meet was a bit nervous on the meet maybe a bit closed off just wasn't really myself that day" one sounds best out of the 3 you suggested.

[Mysty211]

Yeah might send that on Thursday/Friday or even Saturday. an add in "Hey how are you?" at the start an I'll know from if he replies or ignores an then leave it as that. He did ask me a lot of questions thinking he asked more questions then I asked him.

[AndyWes]

Umm... I'm guessing that means, "well, nice meeting you, I don't think we'll be going on a second date."

[Kris85]

He's not interested I am sorry. Any date that has ended with no kiss or plans to meet up again for me , I never saw them again. And for him to keep bringing up going to see his friend during the date is NOT good. I would move on personally

[Anonymous]

how long has it been since the date? Did he mention the friends situation as soon as he saw you? or a bit later?

[Mysty211]

It wasn't straight away it was like maybe 5 - 10 minutes after we met. He was asking what I was gonna do after. After he said "My friend just got back from Germany his girlfriend just broke up with him, so I'd said I'd go and see how he is as he's going through a tough time" We just went to the ice skating place when we first met up he said I'm really unsure about ice skating. We walked over just watching and chatting, he was really nervous about skating. He said he'd wanted to try it but he

[Mysty211]

wasn't too sure once he got there. After a while I did persuade him then we were gonna have to wait 2 hours and he said maybe we'll get a drink or coffee instead? so we did. An he was joking how he got away with not ice skating . An that's when we walked around deciding what to do before going for coffee and taking it away walking around.

[Mysty211]

He did say my cars down this way so we can walk there , an we got and he said he was gonna had off he needed to see his friend. So I'm not sure if he was just really worried about his friend he did seem a little on edge or nervous.

[Opinion Owner]

hhhmmm, has he contacted you? If not, he probably is not that interested, let me tell you why, if he had to leave to aide his friend, he would of contacted you soon after to apologize and set up another date. If he has contacted you, then you shall set another date soon, he might of been really nervous. I hope this helps, good luck, and if it doesn't work out, don't stress it, there is a lot of men out there:)

[Mysty211]

I didn't bother I decided there's no point chasing a guy , an I was thinking possibly I might not have been ready to date yet since my ex . An he'd texted me the day before so that might have been part of the problem.I thought if I'd sent him another message it'd have come across as desperate or needy I deleted his number so I couldn't text him. He hasn't text anything

[Opinion Owner]

Good for you. I will be the first to.admit, I use to wait on guys...but if yo manage to avoid guys like that...you are doing yourself a favor:) focus on you and good things will come...best wishes to you!

[BackAgain]

Wow no hug? No bueno maybe he felt more of a friend vibe

[harveykinkle]

Handshake is not a good sign...

[harveykinkle]

Only read title before. There are multiple red flags here -

1. He wasn't comfortable doing something and you pressed for him to do it anyway.

2. His friend was probably an excuse to leave.

3. He cut your date short

4. He ended it with a handshake and didn't mention seeing you again.

5. "It was nice meeting you" 90% of the time means exactly that and no more. I say that when I have no intention of seeing them again and when I do I say "I had a really great time with you!" ...guys too

[markml]

1. That's not so bad. It's good to encourage people to step out of their comfort zone. On some level, he wanted it or he wouldn't have shown up.

2. Maybe, maybe not. Why would he bother making such an elaborate excuse?

3, Better to be cut short than to wish it was shorter.

4. Maybe he didn't want to be presumptuous?

5. I say "It was nice meeting you" a lot when I'm uncertain how to proceed. Doesn't mean I wouldn't see you again.

[Mysty211]

He suggested the ice skating before we met saying he wanted to try it. He did express he was worried he'd break himself up as he did rollerblading before and he said he nearly killed himself and said he wasn't so sure about it. An when we met he was still a little aprehensive about ice skating thinking it might not be a good idea. I didn't force him I just jokingly said maybe give it a go you might regret I'm bad at ice skating myself sure if it's bad we can leave early an get a drink/coffee.

[Mysty211]

He was watching for a while he was encouraged from me but then he was happy it worked out in his favour joking happy that he didn't have to skate. An said we'll maybe go for food or coffee or drinks.

[Mysty211]

It felt possibly we were both awkward and if my body language was a little closed. Also I had a drink in my hand at the time he went for the handshake so we couldn't really hug. It felt like he was worried about his friend as he did mention it a couple times. He'd said his friend just got back from Germany after his girlfriend just broke up with him so I said I'd go an see him that's where I'm going after I've saw you. He spoke a little about it.

[whiteknight01]

That's not a good sign.

[SaltandVinegar]

A handshake at the end is never good!

[Anonymous]

That's odd.

It is not intimate.