5 Things Couples in Healthy Relationships Do

[Anonymous]

We all know that building healthy relationships is one of the most challenging yet most rewarding parts of a happy life. Unfortunately, there is no instruction manual for putting together the ideal type of relationships between two people. However, there are a few simple things you can do to get your relationship on the right track.

1. Support and encourage each other

Letting your significant other know that you are behind them is so powerful. Sometimes in relationships, we can get so caught up in the obstacles of every day life that we forget to take the time to simply say a few words of encouragement to each other. Encouraging your partner to be the best they can be and letting them know that you are supporting them is one of the best ways in the world to show your love.

2. Know how to apologize when you are wrong

Let's face it, no one wants to be wrong. Sometimes people can be so full of pride or ego that they fail to acknowledge their wrongs and work to make amends with their partner. A good apology consists of 3 parts. The first is to be able to acknowledge that you were wrong. The second is to accept responsibility for your mistakes. The last is to say, "What can I do to fix it?" Sometimes when people say they're sorry, they are merely saying the words without having any true meaning behind them. Having these three parts in your apology will let your partner know that you are genuine and that you want to make things right.

3. Practicing authentic communication

We're all human and humans are imperfect. However, it's important in a healthy relationship to not allow negative energy to weaken your relationship. When your partner makes you angry, talk to them about it. Never leave them with unresolved feelings of anger, bitterness, or resentment. An important aspect of good communication is creating a safe, loving environment within your relationship where you can both feel heard. A lot of relationships fail because of improper or poor communication skills.

4. Saying "thank you"

Don't underestimate the power of these two words. When two people are in a long-term relationship, they can get comfortable. They form habits and sometimes take each other for granted. Always respect each other and show appreciation to your partner. It feels good to know that your partner appreciates you and acknowledges all that you do for them. Sometimes, espeically in a marriage, there are a lot of thankless jobs that BOTH people do every day, so taking a few extra moments to acknowledge that and saying "thank you" to your partner can mean so much.

5. Understanding the balance of 'give' and 'take'

Any solid relationship should have an equal balance of give and take between both people. If one person is putting in much more effort into the relationship, the relationship likely will not be successful or thrive. Relationships are a lot of work and both partners need to work equally hard to maintain their relationship in order to contribute to it's success.

[lumos]

Good take. I'd also like to add a more modern point that comes up on the live feed pretty often on here.
6. Not caring too much about social media
If you feel like you have to constantly show off and prove your relationship on your social media accounts, especially facebook, it speaks volumes about your insecurities concerning your relationship. I've noticed that the couples that share their love story the loudest and most often on facebook are usually the couples that break up the quickest due to several issues within the relationship. It's like they're putting up a façade to fool people into thinking they have it well, when in fact, their relationship is far from good. If you're confident in your relationship, then you'll feel like you'll have nothing to prove. Your relationship would speak for itself. You wouldn't feel the need to make sure your status is out there and you wouldn't feel the need to constantly upload lovey-dovey pictures. A healthy relationship is not based on the acceptance you get through social media. If you feel anxious over the fact that your partner hasn't shared a picture of you on their timeline, then you most probably have some pretty big doubts about your relationship as a whole, if such a small thing can bother you so much.

[myTake Owner]

Thanks and I totally agree with you. I never put anything about my relationship on social media mainly because I don't feel that it's anyone else's business. I think couples who do that are often trying to make it look like they have a great relationship and "show off" but that's just not necessary in my opinion.

[lumos]

Yeah I agree, if you get so anxious just because of social media, then you totally have the wrong priorities and a very odd perspective on what a healthy relationship should look like.

[noneoftheabove]

I agree as well. Some people i know who show off on social media about "how great their relationship is" are usually the ones that are struggling to keep it going or its really hard work for them. Sometimes they might even be convincing themselves that they actually like each other.. This is even married couples. And completely agree that they are the ones who will break up eventually.

Healthy relationships aren't plastered all over Facebook or any social media

[Mekkalyn]

Um what if you upload pictures together because you are always together and so whenever you have the opportunity for a photo he/she is there? I upload lovey-dovey pictures because we're always together and I like to document our lives together. I use facebook like a picture album and keep everything on private, friends only. If they don't want to see it they can unfriend me, I couldn't care less. I don't have to prove anything to anyone or get validation from people on facebook because I couldn't care less about any of that and I literally go on it so there's an online copy of my pictures just in case.

[lumos]

@Mekkalyn using fb as an online album is a bit dumb though, no offense. The quality of the pictures is compromised and become pixelated and bad quality. If you then were to save the uploaded pictures as. JPEG pictures, the quality would again become worse. If you want to upload your pictures online, you're better off using a cloud service, such as dropbox, because then the original quality would be preserved and it would work the same way as facebook. Only a lot better and more private.

[Mekkalyn]

The picture quality looks the same to me.
I don't really care about crisp pictures, and facebook is less annoying than those other sites. I've tried them and I don't like them. I really don't care if you think it's dumb. I was just pointing out the fact that I do it and it's not for validation and I'm in a perfectly healthy relationship.

[lumos]

@Mekkalyn if you know it doesn't apply to you, why feel the need to prove yourself to me?

[Mekkalyn]

I'm not trying to prove myself to you? I'm trying to say that not everyone that posts pictures on facebook needs validation like you said..

[lumos]

@Mekkalyn did I say everyone? No. I said that if you constantly feel like you have to show off on facebook, it speaks volumes about your insecurities. Do you constantly feel that way? According to what you have told me, no. So it doesn't apply to you.

[Mekkalyn]

But an outsider looking in could easily wrap me in with that generalization and think that I am that way, since there's no backstory. You can't know just from someone posting pictures that they need validation or have insecurities.

[lumos]

@Mekkalyn no, and I never claimed I did? I said "usually" = not always. I've seen plenty of couples constantly update their "love story" on facebook, and like a month later they would break up. I've seen plenty of questions on here from girls, asking why their partner doesn't upload pictures of them, asking if they don't love them etc. If you think your boyfriend doesn't love you just because he hasn't uploaded a picture on facebook, then seriously, it speaks volumes of how little you trust him/his feelings and how insecure you are. (I'm using "you" in a general sense here, and not *you* specifically).
Again, I never said that this is what it's like for all couples. Couples that don't share anything on social media could still have it bad. All I'm saying is, I've seen enough of this to know what some are going through. Faking it, etc.

[oddwaffle]

Umm... while this take look rosy, this is not what healthy couples should do. this take focus too much on the mind set, not concrete action. Healthy and long term relationship will have the following:

1. The money talk. Yes, it's unromantic but you are not really together unless you are sharing the responsibility of life together. That means, student loans, car loans, mortgages, credit card debts, future investments, retirement planning... etc. Stuff that really going to make or brake your family. The moment you have this talk and work it out with your partner is the moment you both willing to commit everything together.

2. The children talk. Another topic that tend to creep up once you are both thinking about sticking together. Goes along well with the money talk.

3. The secret talk. Everyone has stuff they can't talk about. From strange sexual fantasy to this crazy rich aunt, there are things people keep so close to their hearts that they can not reveal to anyone, esp the ones being too close. This sort of thing put a strain on relationship that can not be fixed unless both parties accept their partners for whom they are, not what they want them to be.

[spuitkaas]

I like this take. Maybe add things about sex. Not only good sex is important but also to talk about your desires etc.

[Zorax]

Great Take, I agree, completely.

[abundantlyrich]

6. They have lots of good passionate sex