To the ones that love someone struggling with an addiction

[Anonymous]

I've learned the last year that it's really hard and something you can't control. They say you need to support them. I've learned you can only support them so long before you emotionally break down. You can only take so much before enough is enough. There is a time when you have to step away because the addiction has changed them, only they can change themselves back to who they used to know. I walked away from my best friend because I didn't know even who he was anymore and he didn't want me around at all to even help. Last night I walked away from my old love, my first love. He lied to me, gave me empty promises and on so many drugs I don't even know them all. The hardest thing I've ever done. It broke my heart to leave him but I knew staying and getting back together after four years, would destroy me so much more. I miss him already because he's the love I've ever had and the only one I wanted. I knew he wanted me to stay and wait for him, I've waited to long. Sometimes you have to walk away, even if it's the last thing you wanted because, you have to save yourself sometimes before you break your own heart worse.

Good luck to you all. I wish you the best. Sometimes walking away is something you have to do.

[Ananchor]

My current roommate is going through this. He and my fiancée are in the navy, he is being kicked out after coming up positive on about 15 drugs on the drug test. He's put us through so much due to his addiction that it's just too much. I need him to leave our house. I can't emotionally do it with him anymore. He's a super sweet guy when sober but he goes out every night. And talks about how he can't wait to fo drugs all the time since he is getting kicked out :/ on top of him and his issue is my mother, who has smoked weed every day multiple times a day since she was 11- she is 54 now. I'm here to tell you all that bull about weed not changing people or that it's a happy drug is false. She can no longer regulate her own emotions, she has terrible mood swings and weed no longer is able to crub her anger. She's never the chill weed smokers you see on tv, she's angry and loud and wants nothing more than to get her way.
He I can get to move out, a mother... You are kind of stuck with.
I'm really glad you've got yourself out of that situation. If he really does quit then that is great! He will of shown you that he takes life seriously and he takes your relationship seriously. But you are under no obligation to wait. He needs to do this for himself, not for you

[Spiorad_Aisce]

You were absolutely correct to walk away. They have to prove to you they want to stop and will do anything to stop. The understanding must be there that you can walk away at anytime if you can't trust a person anymore. If the addict is at the manipulative stage it is a dangerous time as they can bring you down as well as yourself. I fully agree with the tough love principle.

[myTake Owner]

Thank you very much! It was tough to walk away but I had too. Others need to and not feel guilt.

[Darkfairie17]

When addiction is involved, there are 3 people in the relationship. There is your partner, there is you and then there is the addiction.

Your partner may be very loving, kind and all kinds of wonderful. But when the addiction takes over, they are a screaming, lying and abusive person. This addiction person will do anything to get their way, and they will hurt anyone who gets between them and their addiction.

The thing is, we need to realize when to walk away. As you said, it's hard, but it's definitely necessary. The only person who can stop the addiction is the person who is addicted. They have to seek treatment and make a choice to want to get clean. That is the only way.

[rescuemyheart]

I made a myTake on this very topic that may interest you

www.girlsaskguys.com/.../a26414-coping-with-a-drug-addicted-loved-one

As you can see, I agree wholeheartedly. I'm very sorry you have to know what that feels like as well <3

[Anonymous]

I hope you're reunited one day after she's better. Sorry you were in that situation having to make that decision but it was right. Life will work itself out. Fate has willed you together. She'll get better. .. For you.

[myTake Owner]

Thank you. I hope you are right. I believe we are willed together sometimes too. Only time will tell I guess :/. Thank you

[becca123]

I had to end a marriage because of this. One day you find the strength to say enough is enough.

[myTake Owner]

So sorry to hear that.

[John_Doesnt]

Why doesn't anybody take their loved ones to rehab? It's the only safe option. People can die from the withdrawal of almost any addictive drug. Hell, even Amy Winehouse died because of alcohol withdrawal.

Leave the addiction cure to the professionals, because it's a complicated issue.

[Rawrzz]

Completely incorrect. Alcohol withdrawal and benzo withdrawal are the only two drugs one can die from withdrawal from.

[John_Doesnt]

@Rawrzz wtf? People can die from cocaine withdrawal, heroine, nicotine.

[Rawrzz]

No, sir. They cannot. Check your vocabulary.

[Rawrzz]

Not to mention you misspelled heroin. I think I might be the greater authority on this, given that I was in rehab by the time I was 15 getting lectured by doctors and therapists.

[John_Doesnt]

@Rawrzz why do people think they won an argument if they point out someone's spelling or grammar errors? You must have relapsed.

[Rawrzz]

I think I won the argument, because I won the argument. Though, I didn't see it as an argument: simply giving you more accurate information. Pointing out that you misspelled heroin was simply an ironic, slightly humorous, coincidence: not in any way connected to my feelings of justifying anything.

I wasn't going to go into it, but I'm pretty sure you're thinking of "withdrawal" as "addiction" or "overdose". "Withdrawal" is when a person stops taking a drug, but their body craves it: resulting in withdrawal symptoms like throwing up or anxiety or insomnia, or mind-shattering RLS, etc. etc. Sure. You can die from an *overdose* from anything, particularly a lot of recreational drugs. But the only two mainstream drugs you can *die* from after you *stop* taking them are alcohol and benzodiazapines. You can't die from heroin or cocaine withdrawal. I know my shit on this. Learned it from multiple doctors, like I said.

[Marinepilot]

I've had to leave women for this very reason. It broke my heart.

[Anonymous]

I'm sure you'll get over it before he does.