When did I become a jerk magnet ?

[Anonymous]

why do the wrong guys like me?
i like good men why are "bad news" always attracted to me?

like if im sitting with two guys one of them is a decent good man and the other is a "bad boy" i wouldn't ignore the bad one out of politeness but i would give most of my attention to the good guy

but at the end of the day the bad one is the one that comes up to me and says "i like you"
WWWHHHYYY?

i dress modest, i dont fish for attention, im confident (sorta) but still kinda shy and a bit awkward at times and im not a flirt. i like meaningful conversations and talking about/doing things that actually matter or have some sort of meaning ( i do like to have fun and cut loose too sometimes)
thats not what bad boys want !

why are bad boys attracted to me but good guys arent? and how do i fix that? i know good guys prefer character over looks and i dont consider myself shallow or anything (other people also said the same)

[islands7]

The bad guys KNOW HOW to get attention and are tenacious at this, even if all the wrong/bad ways. If you don't want this, forget polite (they have) so totally ignore & push them away!
WHY?
Because these are the fleas on you that drive the good guys AWAY! They won't put up with such crap and wonder WHY you DO.
When one is attractive, they attract ALL and the jerks stand out like sore thumbs. Same in business, products, et al.

[Asker]

so basically me being nice to the bad ones makes them think there is a chance and the good ones see me talking to the bad ones and they think im into bad boys and they give up... I don't know why or how but that actually makes a lot of sense ! thank you

[islands7]

in a more positive vein, think "this is my goal" and focus ONLY on that goals, those guys and stiff arm, dispose of all other distractions... this is the visualization that top athletes employ, as well as businessmen

[camcam85]

Well, bad boys are usually manipulators and are always trying to perfect their skills. It is clear that you can see a difference. I wouldn't waste any time with someone that you have to question their motives. I wouldn't say good guys aren't attracted to you but they are just using a different approach that you may not be recognizing.

[Asker]

how would a good guy try to approach a girl he likes (besides actually telling her) ? maybe they are trying and i just dont see/notice it

[camcam85]

I would just look for the small things like what you guys talk about in conversation. It also helps to identify body language (read up on it). Its really hard to say as everyone goes about things differently.

[Mesonfielde]

The distinction between bad and good seems somewhat arbitrary, but regardless, the question here is whether the supposed "good" guys realizes that you are interested, and if they themselves are interested, and if they feel like pursuing it. Some guys, assuming possible "bad guys" try their luck with most people as the level of commitment and risk of choosing the wrong person is much more negligible.

[Invoker]

They want to taint your good nature. Or they do that with every girl. =/ just ignore them. Completely.

[Anonymous]

Many good guys are kinda withdrawing from the relationship/dating world these days

[Anonymous]

Serves you right.

You asked for it.

Damaged goods not interesting anymore.

[Asker]

what? what do you mean?

[Opinion Owner]

Ok, returning to serious mode, and I am NOT doing that often.. So LISTEN :

Bad boys will try to get all the vaginas they can, anywhere anytime anyhow.

Forget about this.

Find a nice dude, build a strong relation, be happy. Sometimes YOU have to make the first move and not expect the good guys to suddenly notice and come to you.

It's not a matter of dress, but intellect, surrounding, life habits, reading books, culture enlightenment, having ACTUAL interesting subjects to tell , debate.

Goddammit is Internet really the HowTo Live 2.0?