My mom doesn't like my boyfriend, what should I do?

[Anonymous]

Me and my boyfriend have been together for 4 months and my mom doesn't like him because she thinks he's not the one for me plus she thinks he's cheap because she wants him to give me a lot of money every week. She hasn't spoken to me for 3 days and ever since I started dating him she stopped supporting me financially, (I am seeking a part time job while I still go to college, just haven't found one as yet). 20 year old female feeling stressed.

Break up with him?

Move out with him?

Ignore her until she gets over it.

Updates

+1 y

Oh! And she's not talking to me because I told her is my relationship and she should keep out of it.

Updates

+1 y

It's*

[Satisfyd]

What does everyone else think of him? Get this... if you go into a room and 1 person doesn't like you it could be them or you that's the problem... if you go into same room and no one likes you... you're the problem... my 21 year old is dating a guy that none of my family likes her friends don't like him. He doesn't work. Has a child. Has cheated on her numerous times. He never leaves her alone and failed some college courses because he's so demanding. Everyone in her life has told her to drop him, but she stays with him. Says he's a good guy. I'm not telling you what to do but look at the whole picture. Is this relationship the best for you. Think with your brain not your heart.

[Asker]

Well, he works, studies online, doesn't do drugs, has no kids, helps his family and pays bills too. He is teaching me how to drive and pays my gym and gets me healthy foods so I can lose weight. He also likes to party occasionally and have a drink or 2. Everyone likes him and think he's pretty down to earth.
What's your opinion now that you have a clearer view of him?

[Satisfyd]

Sounds like he's on the right path. Have you tried asking your mom what exactly doesn't she like about him. There must be something, but some parents are just overprotective.

[Asker]

I have and it's all about him not giving me enough money or not looking good enough or us spending too much time together. And she's overprotective, like my curfew is 11 p. m. and I'll be 21 in June and I still have a curfew.

[Satisfyd]

If I look at it from a parent side try to negotiate with her. Maybe a little give and take. Maybe she thinks it's getting to serious to fast. I'd be willing to work with you a little till I was more comfortable with him. He may need to find ways to win her over.

[Asker]

Yeah, you have a point there. She does think we're getting too serious. But still, she doesn't try to get to know him at all. No matter how we try having conversations with her. And all she does is say "what if you guys break up? You will suffer" so that causes me to feel doubtful, she doesn't have any faith in my relationship, and me and my boyfriend are really in love.

[Satisfyd]

She has to be willing to let you learn about life yourself. If you were learning to ride a bike and she never let go would you ever learn to ride by yourself.

[farscryer0]

Ultimately, your mom wants the best for you, that fact is clear. but your mom isn't dating this guy, you are. Likely, she's pushing past bias onto your as "knowledge" but in the end, YOU are responsible for you alone.

Just use protection.

[Asker]

Thank you. Very helpful and true.

[Anonymous]

I think break up is the best option. I don't know why, but from my experiences with parents, especially Mom, her words are always true, at least 'almost' true. Maybe your mother thinks that, your boyfriend is cheap, can't fulfill his own life (or maybe can but he can't give you much). She doesn't raises you into a gold digger, but realistic. Everybody need money. And... Usually, mothers' intuition is correct. Believe me. :)

[Asker]

My mother never liked my brother's girlfriend (now wife) and now she likes her. She just always quick to judge people without getting to know them. I cannot risk my happiness just so she doesn't gets mad. I guess seeing me sad will make her happy...

[Opinion Owner]

Oh, okay then... Don't break up. Just wait until she gets over it. I think, no, why seeing their children sad will make Mothers happy? Like what you said, your mother always quick to judge people, just that, but happy to see you sad, uhmm no... Usually Mothers are stubborn, they think by following their 'rules' and 'words', their children would be happy in the end.

Back to the real point, have you said that to your mother, that she always quick to judge? Maybe you can convince your mother that she's not right?

Good luck :)

[jsroxzcredd]

I hate just picking the third option but it's true. I just have been not having my boyfriend be around my mom/mentioned around my mom as much and she's growing a better liking for him. She's never loved him but we've been dating nearly six months and everything is going okay.

[ravidricha96]

Wow your mom is a bitch, I don't even know.
She shouldn't do something so mean to you, she's not looking out for you. Don't dump your boyfriend or anything though. Not over that.

[Asker]

And she keeps saying that I know her for 20 years of my life, and that I should chose her over him. Smh...

[ravidricha96]

There should be no choosing blank over blank in that scenario. She's giving the stupid ultimatum. She should support you and your decisions. She's clearly not looking out for your happiness.

[Mesonfielde]

Your mother is trying to raise you into a scummy gold digger and I am glad you are resilient! I think she will get over it.

[orphan]

does your mom want him to give you money so you can give her money for her crack addiction?

just throwing it out

[Asker]

She is actually a Christian. Doesn't use Crack, but loves money...

[orphan]

don't let mom golddig you, that's the job of the church

[teawrecks]

Get a new mom?

[Asker]

Easier said than done lol.

[skeptic007]

wow your mom is dumb

[Badbone71]

Be a stripper