Relationships

Are there some people you just never get over?

My partner and I had an open relationship (dumb for us), we had threesomes with a mutual male friend. Male friend and I become f*** buddies while he sleeps with a friend of mine. One thing leads to another I fall HARD for the friend. We have been friends for a long time and it was mutual, things became complicated. So we ended the whole ordeal and we closed the relationship. Unfortunately, the friend and I got drunk and had a slip up. My partner was furious. He threatened to get full custody of my children. Obviously my children are most important so I completely cut the friend out of my life. My partner and I are in a weird spot. He is angry about what happened and I am angry he would use the kids as a way to hurt me. But he wants to work it out and I have no fucking idea what I want or need. I just want my children. So things have been steady. Not good, not terrible, it's been 5 months since and my partner was asking me if I felt like we could be friends with our old friend again without it getting weird. I told him they should be friends and I would just stay out of the whole thing so as not to cause suspicion. But honestly I am still crazy about him. I think about him all the time and this is even after distracting myself with a new job, new promotion, and three college classes. On top of taking care of my kids and doing some interactive classes with my youngest. There is apparently still some room in my busy life for my brain to stop and think about him. It makes me sad and pisses me off at the same time. Will I ever get over him? At this point it feels like torture. I can never be with him. He had dated my partners sister a very long time ago but apparently she never got over him either because she told me that if we ever got serious she wouldn't be able to be friends and I can't imagine creating such an awkward relationship between my children and their aunt. It is just frustrating. The whole thing. I wish I could just move on.
Are there some people you just never get over?
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