Do you have an ex boyfriend/girlfriend that you just can't seem to get over?

[coachTanthony]

[ohshee]

When is the biggest battles in life is to get your brain and your heart on the same page when this happens you can do anything in this world when they are in sync together.
It's so strange how in life we take things on and no matter what it is we make it through it.
But then there comes a moment in time things happened to us so we don't understand. I believe do we have a soul a spirit and an energy do live within us energy Never Dies.
I believe when we die our energy lives on it Gathers everything we've ever done in life everything we've ever said in life it is truly who we are it is our guide our teacher and it warms us and it takes us to our next destination.

I believe when we fall in love if it's just the heart Falling in Love or just the brain Falling in Love and something happens and that relationship ends we walk away from it hurt. Then slowly we recover
But then there's that moment that we fall in love and something happens we break up and we can't get over it.
We can't sleep we can't eat all we do is think about it. Our body hurts our heart hurts.
Day after day after day the same thing and we asked ourselves what is going on this is not like me. If you know anything about energy like I said it has a life form of its own it is who we truly are I think there are moments that are energy actually falls in love with the person we fall in love with energy and I think that feeling that we did is our energy Mourning the l o s s of its true love I think it fell in love with the person we fell in love with energy if that makes since.
It's like somebody that is addicted to alcohol it's not so much you that is addicted to it it's your energy that is addicted to it it has a mind of its own you don't crave it but that energy crazy because it has to feed the body it has to feed that energy if that makes sense.

This is just my thought on it I've been through both of those and my thoughts about energy or just because of things that I have experienced.
We are so much deeper then any of us have ever even thought what is time goes on in the research that is being done it would blow you away and who we truly are
But anyway that's one of my theories on what happens when we can't get over somebody

[CuriousJC]

You have no idea. I used to have a girlfriend I went to school with. He's been dating on and off on and off and I met her mother and she told me to look after her no matter what happened and no matter what goes on in the relationship she kept breaking my heart for the stupidest reasons especially when she can't get her way. The shortest breakup I have with her lasted for three hours after I got her everything she wanted on the list. On and off on and off on and off between me and her like put me first then she'll date three other guys then come back to me break up with me then another three guys before coming back to me again and again and again think of it like a pattern. That crap was annoying until I eventually decided to stop seeing her entirely. I was so sick and tired of being treated like 10 minutes piece of chewing every time she come see me and wants to be in a relationship with me again.

[Alyssa11]

My most recent ex is the ex I will never forget. He was the person I had truly been in love with for the first time and believed throughout the relationship that he was *my* person and the person I was going to spend the rest of my life.

Most people, including myself, can't just forget those feelings and that person overnight. It's been over a year and it hurts way less than it does before, but it's not something I'll forget.

I genuinely just accepted that sometimes people will ALWAYS remain in your life through memories. When you love someone in the true sense, they take a part of your heart with them forever...

[kery123]

Why did it not work out if you don't mind me asking?

[Alyssa11]

Cause of Covid we had to be in an LDR and he was sleeping with someone else

[RacyL]

I feel you there. I have been in multiple relationships but the last one was probably the one I was falling in love fast and flat. It didn’t last long bc he decided that we were not compatible and he broke up w me while we were still madly in love w each other. It was the worst kind of break up when you knew you loved each other but just couldn’t be together. I usually move on fast and find new love fast and will never cling onto any exes. But this time I know it will be different. As you said, he already took a piece of my heart with him and I have to live the rest of my life with that

[Alyssa11]

Ah well I relate!

[jennifer_bloom]

I'm over my ex but I have guys I used to like that I'd be willing to date now if our paths cross - like the guy from work that I used to flirt with - no idea where he is now but we might be friends on social media. I do not know if the profile I found is his since there is no photograph.

[OlderAndWiser]

No. It took me several years to get over my first crush. But it has been onward and upward ever since!

[Anonymous]

I feel all men have one woman they can’t get over. I don't know every guy I’ve been with just seems to be hooked on one woman but the women I meet seem to move on more quickly. I don’t care for any of my exes. There is one that when I’m struggling in my current relationship I do look back at. However, this is more a “better the devil you know” kind of outlook. When things go sour I look back on him and think even though I hate him now there was stability there with him. Then there’s another ex I really struggled to get over and we are still friends but I feel looking back if I can get over that I can get over anything so the thought of him is comforting.

[MCheetah]

Yes. My ex-fiancée. Because 1) she was probably literally the only woman on this entire planet who would ever love me (assuming she ever did; she proposed marriage to me, but I still never knew 100%). And 2) mainly because we never split up. She died in an apartment fire almost nine years ago, come November 1st. I know it was 2012, but nothing has exactly been sunshine and roses since then. I still do miss her. But at the same time, it's a little bittersweet, because at least now, she's spared the experience of having to be married to me...

[LTrish]

Oh no! So sad.

[t-8900]

I did until i saw her years later. We had known each other a long time, very intimate, most serious relationship I was in. The Irony? She didn't even recognize me, forgot about all the special moments we shared, all of it. That was sobering. And what was also sobering was that she had 2 children in-toe that came from 2 baby daddies AND neither one could be found to pay any form of child support... talk about a train wreck? I treat that girl fucking amazing, better than any of the other guys. But guess what? It was all for not. At the end of the day I was a number and worse still one she completely forgot about!

[LTrish]

Maybe she likes the bad guys and finds it exciting. Sounds like you're better off. Still hard tho

[t-8900]

@LTrish yep and look where it got her. But you're right I am so much better off without her!

[Wester1967]

Yes. It is the horrible Trauma Bond. I hate it. Makes me feel aggressive murder level rage. Trauma induced for little more than kicks and giggles from a person I was too dumb and inexperienced to protect myself from.


Having said that, over time, living a decent life and not being crazy, I’ve lapped these sad sorry ass MFs multiple times. Still doesn’t make the pain or rage go away, but twists the screwdriver up under them for a little schadenfreude.


Either way, trauma bonding should be a crime

[LTrish]

Definitely

[pjf1958]

My fiance as I speak. Yes, if something devastating happened to us, it would shorten my life. I wouldn't be able, not to think about her. A nightmare.

[sage2021]

The question said ex not someone you are currently with.

[ColoradoKid]

I will admit that some took me longer to get over than others. However it gives you a chance to stand back and look at what went wrong and how much they truly had your back. Not many had my back and I don't understand it. I always had theirs.

[meetkitty123]

Nope. When its done its done. Its rough at first to move forward but with time it happens.
The only individual I've sincerely missed and do think about from time to time was my boyfriend would have been fiance cuz found out later he was about to purpose who died in a vehicle accident.

[Inexpensivefurniture]

Yeah, my first serious partner. I know we aren't compatible long term, I know I don't want to get back together, I know it's good for both of us that we broke up... but I still miss him sometimes. He really is a great guy, if a couple things had been different we might still be together. It would almost be easier if he'd been an asshole, because then I wouldn't have family and friends saying "He was so nice, what happened?" and "I really liked him, it's too bad you guys didn't work out."

[LisaRaven]

Yes, two years and one bad relationship later I still am not over the guy I gave my virginity to.

[t-8900]

at your age that's completely normal. You are pair bonded to him. Biologically women bond better with the first 1-3 sex partners then later ones until the guy can prove his worth. If we were more entuned to our natures and not materials and dopamine hits it's likely the two of you would have stayed together forever, assuming you were his first too. Don't feel bad about it even men pair bond to an extent. Just not as hard as women.

[MCheetah]

@lisaraven
Sorry to hear that.

[LisaRaven]

Ty, eventually I'll meet someone.

[t-8900]

keep the faith and you will!

[224466881010]

A lot of girls have told me that their first will always have a special place in their heart.

It sounds like you aren't ready to have another relationship in the first place until you get over him though. Just have patience with yourself and take time to be by yourself, get clear on what you want from life personally, what you like/don't like in men based on your experiences and just take small steps to meeting new people in my opinion. Don't rush.

[LisaRaven]

I'm definitely taking my time.

[gaguser77]

@LisaRaven follow me.

[Anonymous]

Had a really hard time getting over my ex from an extremely toxic relationship mostly bc toxic relationships mess with your mind more than anything else

[LTrish]

Same. Hard to heal from the trauma. Hugs

[exitseven]

I still think of some of them but I am definitely over them. It has been almost 30 years.

[electromagnetic]

I have an ex tucked behind the back of my brain. He's just chilling.

[scooogy]

at least my ex-crush is.. she knows that like she once said herself her exes "weren't better than 'the rest' " (however many they were). But especially due to that fact she shouldn't just again and again run into guys who she dates after only a few months of getting to know them.

[Sarahr123]

I only have ever had one long term boyfriend so I have no exes and if I let someone go then I’m 100% sure of it so no I would probably never be in that situation

[ShaTTeredMasterpeace]

He's not an ex, but a friend that I was really close with. He decided that he didn't want me in his life recently with no explanation and I've been having a hard time dealing with that.

[Hairylegs222]

Nope. Billion other women out there and dwelling on one woman still is unnecessary.

[Anonymous]

No but I have a crush that ghosted me after 4 months of chatting, that I can't get over

[Anonymous]

Maybe shortly after the breakup. But speaking long term, no.

[Browneye57]

No. Everybody has to move on at some point.
Old memories are replaced with new ones, but the old ones don't just disappear.

The best way to get over someone is to get a new someone. Amazing how that changes everything.