What if you genuinely don't want anything for Christmas?

Question

My girlfriend keeps nagging me about what she can get me for Christmas. thing is I don't want or need anything I'd genuinely be go happier if she kept her money than waste it on something I don't want. Should I be honest with her?

Rawrzz · Accepted Answer

It won't work. I've tried. They'll just get you something you don't want, if you don't tell them what you want. See. They don't want to get something *for you*. It's about themselves, like everything is. It gives them pleasure to give you a gift. It doesn't matter to them if you dont want one or if it makes you uncomfortable. It's just about them getting their own pleasure. Everything is ultimately like that. So your wishes are irrelevant.

You could explain that you don't want anything. But, I doubt you'll have any luck. On the same hand, it would be selfish of you to deprive her of her pleasure for your happiness. Unless you're just going to be resentful every year she gives you a gift (like me), in which case the deprivation might outweigh resentment, ultimately providing a greater benefit to her, in the long run. So, it depends on whose desires you want fulfilled.

I don't subscribe to the tradition of gift giving. It usually just proves exactly how little other people know about you. And, you usually just trade gifts of comparable value, ending up with neither really gaining anything. You lose $50 bucks buying something someone else most likely doesn't want; they lose $50 bucks for something they probably don't want.

And if you tell each other what you want, it serves an even greater practice in futility, as you essentially just swapped money and were forced to buy something for yourself (essentially), when you could have used that money better without the obligation, as could they have.

If you want to give someone a gift, then it should be spontaneous, not planned yearly.

Saoirse_Nua · Accepted Answer

I am very like you - Get her to arrange something the both of you could do - A day out or a trip away etc

xkellier94x · Accepted Answer

If you don't want anything you don't want anything, I just think because of the fuzzy feeling Christmas gives everyone it puts people in a giving mood so they want to give presents or gifts to people they love. I don't know how she will take that but just tell her you don't want anything this year, she may agree but she'll probably just buy you something anyway.

Girlanony · Accepted Answer

You can tell her to write you a letter instead, and say that you honestly prefer that instead of her wasting her money, because you truly don't want anything. A letter, in the other hand, can help her get over that "I need to give you something because I love you" phase, and be happy with your reaction after you read it <3
Just an idea, hope it helps.

Solitude4 · Accepted Answer

Maybe ask her to treat you to a Christmas dinner (you need to eat anyway) or movie you like or draw you a portrait of you or both of you together as a Christmas present? :-D Or ask her to go Christmas shopping with you so that you can choose something affordable which you really want that won't end up as clutter in your house.

Pixiefairylady · Accepted Answer

Yes, but she probably likes to please you... or she likes Christmas and the ritual of giving and receiving gifts.

Tell her to surprise you, just go with the flow if she enjoys it, also... find out what she wants because I'm sure if she likes giving Christmas presents, she may love receiving.

fauchelevent · Accepted Answer

Hmm, I guess ask for something that's maybe home made or say that you'd rather spend the money on going out instead, like on a weekend break or just on a nice night out or go like... Skiing or something :P

OlderAndWiser · Answer

Absolutely do NOT tell her to not get you anything. When she offers you a gift, she is trying to show that she wants to do something to please you. When you then tell her that you don't want a gift, you are denying her the opportunity to prove that she wants to please you. Think of an activity that would cost a few pounds or Euros, whatever you guys use for money these days, and suggest that she provide that activity to both of you jointly. Finally, act very appreciative when you finally get to do the activity.

Whenever a gift is offered, accept it and be gracious; you will add to your reputation as a gentleman!

NearlyNapping · Answer

Be honest and let her know you don't want anything. But don't push it too hard and be a dick about it. If she gets you something anyway, thank her for it, and try to be sincere about it. Even if you don't want something, she might want to give you something, so accept it gracefully.

I'm not a Christmas person myself. I don't acknowledge it so it's just another day for me. However I know it's important to other people so I try not to be a Grinch about it.

Anonymous · Answer

You can try. I also hate getting things for Christmas.. people get upset. My mom used to tell me it's not just about you. Think of something small and cheap and practical... like new razors or soemthign you'd buy yourself anyway... taht's what I do-lol.

Anonymous · Answer

Just tell her that although you appreciate her for wanting to buy you presents for Christmas, but you really don't feel that you want or need anything and that it's better for her to save her money for later when something later that comes up. Something really important or unexpected.

AskNaz · Answer

Hmm.. I'd probably still let her get me something. Maybe her language of love is gifting. Besides, she wants to surprise you with something. It's fun and the anticipation makes Christmas more exciting.

Giacomanzo · Answer

I'm totally with you on this. I HATE receiving gifts. It makes me feel sorry for the people who had to start wondering around in order to makes me feel appreciated.
If you wanna give me a gift during any festivity, give me a hug, way much lesser pressure.

NicknameShirt · Answer

If she really really wants to give you something, why not something she made herself? A poem, a picture, whatever meaningful thing. I would love it if a girl did that for me, rather than a bought product.

madhatters4 · Answer

just explain that you don't want her spending much money on you. that you are content and don't need anything

but i'd still expect that you may get something from her. perhaps you could suggest a creative cheap or free thing that she could get you

Editor · Answer

The best thing to do is make a short list of specific things that aren't expensive, like books or something. This satisfies their desire to do something nice for you, lets you get something you won't hate, and avoids arguments.

TacosRAwesome · Answer

Tell her you dont want anything particular yet and that you will tell her once you figure it out. Or if you know she's really good at something, suggest she makes you that, example she's an artist then ask for a painting.

Wonderer89 · Answer

I'd be honest, or ask that instead of a gift you make a special date/experience with each other instead

Puppylove94 · Answer

Tell her to get you a date night to a couple night at a paint and sip place.. don't tell her this before... but just let her keep the picture you both paint.

Mesonfielde · Answer

Then tell her that anything works as long as it's cheap and she made it with love :p

bcromartie · Answer

Ask her for a visa giftcard that can be spent anywhere and never expires. Now she wins because she gets the psychological joy of giving you the gift and you win because you'll need to buy gas someday.

Theodorable · Answer

Every year I tell my family to give my presents to my sister's kids because her husband is chronically unemployed. They never do though.

Jersey2 · Answer

Perhaps tickets to a concert or an event that you cane do together. It would be a good memory.

helloitsmethere · Answer

I just want money to buy my own gifts. That's what someone gave me last year. Money.

reixun · Answer

Ask her to buy you a week vacation to a salon spa then give it to me.

brewersfan01 · Answer

just get some tools or somthing and make her happy bro

IvoirianGirl20 · Answer

Lol be glad someone is thinking about making you happy by spending THEIR money on YOU

Fightingspirit · Answer

All I want for Christmas is you...

Chico_brah · Answer

Ask her to buy you a flesh lite.

Anonymous · Answer

I just want the same thing I wanted last year but never got and that's a girlfriend

Adigelunar · Answer

yeah u should

What if you genuinely don't want anything for Christmas?

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