Why is it so hard to find a good woman?

[anthony123]

Why is it so hard to find a good woman I mean I'm not the best guy in the world but I'm honest and I won't cheat on her that's not what I'm about I won't lie I had a long past with woman I have cheated before there is no excuse but I messed up then but now I'm grown and want. A good woman I hook up with a girl she is cool then she want to sleep with me I mean that's cool in all but I'm trying to set down a solid foundation and if I hit on the 1 date I will be finished with her because I already got her most precious gift what else can I get out of her right? I'm not saying I wouldn't give a girl like her a chance but its bad when a guy says let's wait. isn't it? But what I was saying I wouldn't mind to have a girl like that but we have to compromise and it will work I understand everyone has a past so do I I don't care of your past. I think this happens when they don't gt enough attention from there father figure or they don't have 1 I'm not trying to be your daddy I'm trying to find a good ass woman. I will work with you that's what I'm trying to get out.. well can some1 please tell me open my mind and tell me why is this like this I can't find. A woman good woman

[Nyx_85]

"...I already got her most precious gift what else can I get out of her right?"

Uh sex isn't the only important thing that a girl can offer you. If you find a decent girl it's honestly one of the LEAST important things she can give you. There is no much more that people can give than just sex. That is a very immature thing for you to say.

"I'm not saying I wouldn't give a girl like her a chance but its bad when a guy says let's wait. Isn't it?"

No it's not! If anything it's a huge relief off our shoulders. You see here you are just contradicting yourself! Because you say it's 'bad' when a guy says let's wait yet you get turned off if a girl sleep with you too soon. I mean come on... People expect the female to have all this will power and be able to turn down a guy no matter how much we like him and how much we are attracted him. Hello women get horny too! Yes some woman are smarter about things than others (ie- avoiding situations where something could happen. Like going straight home right after the date is over) But then there is also the case of how soon is too soon? Let's say you're spending a lot of time together and getting along great. You're constantly groping on this chick trying to get some and she gives in after a week or and so you freak out and say 'Oh it was too soon. She's too easy!' Well then WHY THE HELL were you bugging her so much? We're human too you know. The choice of whether or not to have sex and how long to wait should be a SHARED decision.

And yes females who didn't have a decent father figure growing up (or lack of one) do seem to tend to have more problems. But doesn't mean they are all looking for attention of a 'daddy replacement'. I mean I grew up with a good father but I've known a lot of women who didn't. Some of them have some issues but there are also quite a few that are incredibly well adjusted people. And if anything it made them stronger. So if you meet a girl who says 'Yeah I didn't have a father growing up' or 'he was abusive' then don't automatically cross her off. You can pretty much tell if she has issues by how needy she is and how much attention she requires from you. If it's a constant thing to the point that she gets upset if she can't see you every single day (or multiple times a day) and is always calling or texting then yes obviously she has problems.

[allpanache]

After reading your question my honest opinion is you can't find a good woman because you are in no way, shape or form ready for one. Chances are you've probably "had" plenty of good women. Some of the stuff you have written here is very immature and full of unfounded assumptions. The comment about not getting enough attention from a father figure suggests to me that you are actually the one with "Mummy problems" if a girl has past family issues it is not for you to be so rude about it. People work through things in their own time and their own ways and that type of GOOD woman needs a supportive partner so you're right, they are very wrong for you.

If a girl wants to sleep with you on the first date it would suggest to me that she doesn't see you as serious material. Perhaps you need to work more on yourself, rather then shooting down every woman you meet. There are plenty of good women out there, but as you said everybody has a past and that affects how all of us behave in the present.

[shes-a-lady]

for the same reason why it's hard to find a quality man.

and by the way it might not be the women it could be you. try changing your definition of "her most precious gift"...

ahhahahaha I have daddy issues too and I'm a virgin. stop assuming ^^

[BlackSuperman]

why is so hard to find a good woman? Let's see... between feminism (it truly sets women BACK about 100 years), female playersim, fear, anger, angst, hatred of men, absolute cluelessness about women by men... you get what you get... in your case, you sound like you are starting to realize what a good woman is... but you haven't been able to find em (usually due to the reasons listed above AND in your question)... plus, as often said... love happens when you aren't looking for it. Too many people try to force it, not letting it happen gradually, naturally. Dude, your still young- you got time to figure it out for yourself...

[themastaplan]

you can't find a good women because you keep looking for one...there are PLENTY of good women out there man, just stop trying so hard...love finds YOU, you don't find love...just sti back, relax, go with the flow...seriously tho don't go looking for a gf, it will just happen, you'll know that feeling when you get ti and she will too...if its meant to be...dont rush things

[khellendros]

This man speaks the truth, listen to him. Finding love happens almost entirely independent of the effort you put in. In fact, working TOWARDS finding someone will actually hurt your chances as girls have this innate sort of radar that tells them you are trying too hard and might be doing things that you wouldn't do if you were just being yourself. Let the laws of attraction work in your favor rather than trying to hard and having it seem that it's working against you. Love will not be forced.

[shes-a-lady]

They're both right!

[frustratedchump06]

Ugh not literally, love does not actually find you if you are a guy, since we generally always have to do the pursuing and chasing, initiating

[simpleguy2010]

Frustratedchump06 is right, always we guys efforts to find love.

[themastaplan]

To the last 2 comments...you guys are playing the wrong game...dont chase women, chase the money, they come with that sh*t (thank you 50) lol...but really just go out and have fun, you can put effort in, just don't let her know ur looking for a gf, just go with whatever goes son...khellendros is just as right as I am

[bethesda]

women aren't gonna be good to you just because. you gotta show them somethig to make them feel like they can open up to you. its like respect people and you will be respected. be good to them and they'll be good to you

[Anonymous]

Maybe it's not time yet... Good men and women are hard to find nowadays, but if you do found one, then you're lucky. I really hope you mean it when you said "I'm honest and I won't cheat on her I won't lie." All the best to you :)

[dwiller943]

Go for the quiet socially awkward girls. Just saying.

[Anonymous]

I'm definitly a good woman, and I wonder why is hard to find good guys too...

[soulfulleyes]

why is it so hard to fid a good guy?

[johnny_hustle]

Because you live in cali, haha no but if I had to take a guess its because you aren't looking in the right places for a good guy. Finding a good guy for a girl is just as hard for a guy to find a truly good girl these days. there are a lot of girls and guys who claim to be good but after a long relationship the true form of them comes out. The good guys you are looking for are tough to find because they don't openly go for anyone like the players do