It's more complicated than just taking turns or each paying half. There are more things to consider. If I ordered a salad and water, while she ordered two appetizers, a 16oz premium steak, and champagne - it wouldn't exactly be fair for us to split it evenly. In that case, both should just pay for their own meals.
Also, it doesn't account for who has a larger salary. If I make twice her salary, it wouldn't be fair for me to insist on eating at 5 star restaurants every time we leave the house, and still expect her to pay for her own food or half the bill. It'd only be fair if I either accepted that I'd have to spot her if I wanted to eat expensive food, or better yet just go to a restaurant she can afford and split the cost fairly.
In any case, one of us paying the entire bill every time we eat out is out of the question. I would never let her shoulder the bill like that every time, and if she expected me to do that, there wouldn't be a second date. That's all there is to it.
it should always be split or even pay. girls who let guys pay all the time or feel ENTITLED to getting their shit payed for them are scum for both men and women. women should have equal rights to men, you saying he should pay is a step back. and it's shotty for the guy because he's paying for two fucking meals. ludicrous. I wouldn't even consider dating a girl with the "guys should pay" mindset
I think it depends on the guy and relationship. In my relationship my boyfriend is pretty old fashioned, he would sooner walk in front of a bus than let me pay for a date. I wouldn't be opposed to treating him, I actually feel bad sometimes that I don't. And while he isn't my ATM, and don't see him as such he does make far more than I do and I couldn't possibly afford the dates he takes me on.
If I were paying we would be hitting the dollar menu at McDonald's and when I said he could super size it he would know it was a special occasion. Lmao!
I know not all guys are this way it's just the way he is. I try to do what I can to let him know how much I appreciate and love him to make up for it.
It depends on how the socioeconomic status of both partners. If you make just as much money as he does or he makes no money at all, I think it's fair. If he makes more money than you do, then the burden is on him to pay. I'm probably old fashioned, but most people are anyways when it comes to dating etiquettes. I dated a guy who had more money than I did and asked me to contribute to the bill even though he had thousands of dollars on him. I was immediately turned off. Lots of guys would be more than happy to pay for your bill if they have enough money and care about you.
Honestly, I wouldn't be ok with it, because he has a better job, and he makes a lot more money than me, and if a guy can't afford fancy restaurants all the time, he should just take her to some inexpensive place or cook something at home. I wouldn't be ok with him trying to save on me instead to, for example, quit smoking or not buy a new laptop which he doesn't even need. I really like to feel that attention and care, like he is doing everything for me, it doesn't matter if it's a 2$ slice of pizza or a 200$ five-course meal...
totally reasonable if i was working.
atm im not working, so if my boyfriend asked me to pay, i wouldn't have money to pay either. however, when i do have money, i always offer to pay to make up for all the times he paid. he'll reject tho, i think cos im unemployed.
Opinion
9Opinion
Voted C. I'm paying most of the time right now anyway... not that he asked me to but because he was unemployed for over 6 months and has a lot of debts to repay now that he started working again. I'm also making a lot more than he does now, so it only makes sense that I pay more, which I really don't mind at all either.
Okay with it? I'd be thrilled that; A. He's comfortable enough around me to ask something like that, B. That he trusts I can pay for myself without any problem, 3. That he's giving me a chance to pitch in.
I come from a big family so not pulling your weight was never an option. I hate seeing things one sided in relationships & friendships especially when it comes to showing care. So yeah, I'd think it was great. It'd be even better if he let me treat him.
Consider basing it on your financial well being. If I was making ten times what my girl was she wouldn't be paying for anything. Ever. That was usually how it worked out.
That said, we like you to make enough to pay for your own shoes, purses, and boob jobs. :)
It's funny how always those feminists girls I know are the ones who complain when the guy wants to go 50:50
My guy almost always pays for dinner. I offer to pay, but he usually pays anyway. He seems to appreciate the offer though, and there have been times when I've straight-up insisted on paying, and he obliges.
Honestly it's weird to me that you'd have to ask about those things.. with every guy that I have been with it has just been a natural progression like I OFFER to pay and he always tells me no but then I still pay...
My boyfriend and i tend to pay for ourselves but sometimes work on a basis of like "I'll buy the movie tickets if you buy the snacks"
I never mind paying for a girl who doesn't feel entitled and I'm her meal ticket. When a girl offers to pay, it makes me feel good about paying for her. Sometimes I'll pay for dinner and later she might buy me a drink, it's not I ask her to, she just does. Splitting costs isn't something we really think about because we're both pretty financially responsible.
Fair is fair. This is what equality means. In my relationship, we split everything down the middle automatically. That said, it's nice when he offers to cover the whole bill once in a while, and I do the same now and then.
We do that a lot anyway, it's something that I do like. I don't wanna be patronised or have him constantly pay for me as if I'm unable to do it myself. I like one of us paying one time and the other paying the next or splitting the cost equally.
We do that now. Be take turns in paying for groceries, going out for dinner, going to the movies etc. I think it's only fair.
Old fashion, decent guys want to take care of you in all ways.
That's when you know he wants you to be his wife, mother of your child.
If he is counting pennies... rethink...
I think it could be both ways depending on the status of your relationship. At first when dating the guy should pay for awhile.
Isn't this how normal, healthy and functional relationships work?
There is also a thing to consider how much each makes. It wouldn't be fair to go to costly places when one makes much less than the other.
It's your relationship, you can do it however you want. I like feeling like a princess and being taken out on dates, granted I buy him a lot of gifts and buy other things for us that don't involve food.
My boyfriend and I take turns paying most things, bills wouldn't be a big deal.
I would wonder why he's asking because we already do that. It's not a set schedule but it comes out about equal.
I'd prefer to split each bill, but that seems fair too
I do that now. I think it's considerate for both people. I'm not with him for is $.
Oh it's your turn to pay this week? *orders a $200 bottle of wine*
You can also add your opinion below!
Most Helpful Opinions