Why do I feel single even though I’m in a relationship?

[Anonymous]

I’ve been dating this guy for about a month now, and he is my first boyfriend. He is the cutest and kindest person ever but I just feel like nothing has changed in me. I feel single, I don’t feel like I am in a relationship. I’m obviously committed to this, and would never cheat. maybe I just haven’t realised that I am dating someone. I don’t know but it confuses me. What do you guys think? I am 18 by the way

[pollypocket159]

I would think that yes, you just don't realize that you're in a relationship yet. Personally, I felt the same way with MY first boyfriend. A good way to feel like you're in the relationship with that person is to get a little physical. This is what happened with my second boyfriend and really felt like I was dating him after a month. I knew exactly what his hair felt like, what he smelled like, the texture of his skin and pretty much all of his shirts, the way his arms felt around me, the way his hand fit into mine, what his lips felt like on mine, how he breathed and how his heart beat. I also knew exactly what his voice sounded like when we would cuddle and what it sounded like when he pressed his forehead against mine and said something. Knowing what all of these feel like is something you don't really experience with anybody else, especially not when paired with butterflies in your stomach. Then, anytime you see them you know exactly what warmth feels like coming from them, and that really connects two people better than anything else.

[Xoxocutekitty]

either your feelings for him are not that strong, the relationship is slower paced than you imagined it being, you think that being in a relationship "immediately changes you."

Real relationships don't change you, you change (or grow into a relationship) by gradually by making decisions that revolve around another person instead of just yourself. If you're only a month in, you're still deciding where to meet on your next date, what time, and whether who likes who more. It's not that deep yet, just enjoy the freedom of getting to know someone without worrying about his friends and family, who also know you and dislike you for petty reasons :P

[Moonchild714]

It's only been a month, you're still getting to know him, figuring things out, wondering about so many things in the first few months. You're still sorting your feelings out. You'll feel you are in a relationship once things are truly solid, you're in love with him, you know he's in love with you, and the two of you are definitely in this together. Always remember there is a difference between Loving someone and being In Love with someone.

[Anonymous]

''He is the cutest and kindest person ever ''

That's the problem. It won't be long before you crave something more exciting and unpredictable. Half of the women I've worked with in long term relationships are looking elsewhere.

You mentioned that you would never cheat... but I wonder why you mentioned it at all.

I think you are bored, either of yourself, him, or both. As soon as you meet a guy that makes you feel hot, that ''feeling single'' will amplify.

The other day, a girl I work with was acting in a such a way that I had to remind her that she already had a boyfriend...

[boggboss]

Sounds like u are not content with yourself and may be suffering from depression how much do you 2 talk?

[almarieeeee]

You might be emotionally disconnected! Keep trying for a few months and if nothing changes get out! But on the flip side don’t become too dependent on the other person

[Livinglogical]

Not really sure u are supposed to feel any differently just because u are no longer single. I mean u are obviously still allowed to find other people attractive etc... As long as u don't act on it.

[babygirl646_2012]

You build relationships they don’t develop over night 😅

[Anonymous]

What the hell did you think would happen? That'd you'd enter into an emotional cocoon and come out a mature butterfly? You don't feel like anything has changed because nothing actually changes. Nothing. You agree with a person to partner up for mating and that's about it and really that doesn't shift a damned thing in your soul.

[SabbyMax]

Why do you feel single though? Like you guys spend time together? Do couple things like kiss hug go out on dates and stuff like that?

Or do you not do that?

[Asker]

We do meet up a lot, and yes we do kiss and hug.

[SabbyMax]

Welp I got nothing. Maybe you are just really used to be single. I was like that for a while and still sometimes am with my boyfriend now.

[Anonymous]

I literally just went through this same situation. For me it felt like he was falling for me too fast and I still didn't know my feelings for him. As long as you aren't feeling suffocated or bad about your relationship I think you'll be fine. You just have to learn what your feelings are for him. It might take a while.
Good luck!

[issabelle]

u might not love him yet or ur to used to being single where it will take u a while to get used to

[lostgirl_searching]

Since it's a been a month, you probably just haven't really realized it. Give it some time and soon you won't feel single.

[Sebdcjones]

You are in an unfamiliar situation and haven't figured out how to feel yet

[agoodgirlmostly]

Probably cause no chemistry. Break up with him and just be single!

[Kenni]

Is it long distanced?

[Asker]

No, it’s not

[ShesAmerican]

your feelings are probably not that strong

[redrum187]

You probably have depression to be honest

[skiron]

Dump him and move on.

[ddcakes]

No connection

[lilmissumshine]

Wow sad

[sidvt]

May be u r inferior