How does a man take the lead in his relationship?

Question

ak667 · Accepted Answer

Independence first and foremost. You have your own things to do and your own plans, and never let anyone take that away from you. However, independence alone won't necessarily make you a leader. It could just make you a loner and a rebel. But it's a start.

Next is cultivating the qualities that cause others to follow you like assertiveness, initiative, maturity, and emotional discipline. Maturity and emotional discipline are important since you can't be a very impartial judge who inspires loyalty if your emotions are out of control and getting in the way and lack accountability. A follower isn't going to want to follow a leader for long if his shortcomings cause him to constantly take things out on his followers and transfer all the blame to them.

Most of what I'm focused on will be on how to be a good and decent leader who people look up to, not a bad leader who people fear crossing. And a good leader will not look at leadership as a privilege to be abused, but a burden: a responsibility to look out for the well-being of those who follow. It means you have to make all the executive decisions and bear the consequences and take responsibility all the time as well as stepping up to the plate and taking initiative when a volunteer is needed.

A decent leader is also not going to be above seeking the advice of his followers. To the contrary that's something he's going to do frequently to involve everyone. The difference is that the executive decision ultimately lies with him at the end of the day, and both parties know and expect this if you're the leader. It also helps to be the more responsible and wiser one in the relationship, and to be perceived as such, since if you're very irresponsible and don't step up to the plate when a responsible person is needed, your girl might start doing that and basically take over.

Lastly, I'm kind of old-fashioned but I think if you want to lead and have the responsibility that comes with it, you establish that in the beginning right from the early dating process. In that case you'd ask the girl out, decide where to go instead of asking her where she wants to go, arrange everything, pay for everything, and if there's a car involved, you're in the driver's seat and she's in the passenger's seat.

ManlyMan_ · Accepted Answer

Setting dates, picking her up, going for the first kiss, etc. are all examples of a guy leading to some extent.

Essentially don't be insecure and indecisive. If you're in the mood for Thai food and you know your girlfriend isn't currently busy and loves it too, set a reservation and take her out. Then when you get back home start making out up against the wall, cause you know damn well you've been thinking about her the entire dinner and then pick her up and carry her to bed. I'd be surprised if most girls didn't enjoy their boyfriend doing this every now and again.

debi2622 · Accepted Answer

Some women are pretty dominate in their lives and relationships. You have to figure out if the woman is dominate already. If she is, it will take communication with her to express that you believe the man should take the lead in relationships. I am pretty strong, and my boyfriend realized this early on. He believes men should be the lead in relationships. He talked to me about it. I had to think about it and we came to a compromise. I am still my strong self, and most likely will always be. But I am able to relinquish some of my strength in some matters, and he is happy with that. It is nice to just relax and not have to think/worry about some stuff - as it is on him. Funny. Never thought I would be able to do it truthfully, but it is kind of relaxing. Anyway, a strong woman will need to understand and agree, so that there is no confusion or misunderstandings that could create issues. Communication is always key. When you are with a weaker woman, you would prob have to take the lead anyway, so would be no issues then.

sugarchateau · Accepted Answer

Here’s a few optional ways a man can take the lead in his relationship:
- initiate and suggest more.
- ask more questions (like this post) in order to keep yourself always thinking.
- try to always be one step ahead (not to use this against your partner but in order to be prepared to guide it better).
- express your passions, goals and drives then make a spot for your partner to flourish (when considering their strengths and weaknesses).
- great communication skills help your leadership to develop.

Your partners reaction/participation will vary greatly depending on the type of person that they are. Stay true to yourself and you’ll attract the one fit for you. A note to leave on; a dictator is feared but only the weak and messed up remain loyal. Don’t be afraid to fail, only be afraid to not learn how to overcome.

Good luck!

Middleman · Answer

He takes the lead by being attentive, and giving himself (and her) room space to breathe and grow. 'Leading' the relationship doesn't mean 'follow and do exactly as I say' or fully dominate someone's life but being able to help make the difficult decisions when the other person is not able to; do things the other person cannot; but also at the same time allowing room for her to make her viewpoint felt and heard and take it into consideration in the decision-making process.

He should also 'by instinct' know at most times what's on his partners mind (at least); should try to share his stuff and time; and should make efforts to please her whenever. If she is sick for example, he needs to at least know what is going on with her. Too many folks these days who just purely focus on their own selfish needs (i. e. highly absorbed playing videogames) tend to miss this point and so end up with relationships that are bound to fail.

You have to remember the other person has a vested interest in YOU, because to them you are their future. If you and them are lucky the next part of their lives will be spent with you, so they have to make sure this is the route they want to take and trust and believe in. Likewise you with them. Everything hinges on you being able to lead properly (being honest, caring, supportive, transparent) so you have to make a good show of it.

Anonymous · Answer

Because of our cultural and biological sterility, I believe we have been fated for destruction. Even though this end stares us right in the face, the best we can muster is a few rants on internet web sites, while the barbarians are raping, conquering, and breeding. I promise you they will win. History shows that the barbarians always win. They are the solution to a broken people. They faithfully worship their gods while we worship our Facebook likes and celebrities. We are so hopelessly sterile, so anti-life, that nature will celebrate when we are replaced by those who can barely read. But they will treasure the life of their kind, and that’s enough.
Even if we solve all the political problems of the day, and neutralize the most vulgar of our society, what are we left with? A shrinking population and citizens so atomized that they are even losing the ability to communicate with each other, who have to use computerized apps and alcohol to fornicate while the female is on sterility medication, which her parents awarded her upon turning 16 years old. Our punishment is coming. Lands of the West will be given away, and even if the barbarian horde can be beaten with technology, there will be a day where there’s man left to stand against them to push the kill button. The barbarians will inherit the new world until they become civilized themselves and the cycle renews once more, like it has many times in the past.
Nature doesn’t care about your egalitarian laws or your superior IQ.
It cares about reproduction and power, and what the barbarians lack in intelligence, they make up for in life energy. We are the anomalies, we are the mistakes, and unless we re-discover the ways of family, tradition, and God, we must be ready to accept the inevitable end that it was us who become so weak as a people that we didn’t even bother having a gate, and that all the barbarians had to do was walk right in.

LS1984 · Answer

Tell her what you want, then ask her opinion, and take it into consideration. A relationship should be give and take on both sides. If there is a small issue, just take care of it. If it's a large issue, bring it to her and work through it together. Taking the lead on a relationship isn't about dominating everything, It should be about letting her know that she is safe, supported, and cared for.

Alan180188 · Answer

- if I answer you by your logic: I'll say by being a "man" :D
dominate the bedroom, fuck like it's your last day on earth, bring every stupid comment she made earlier in the day, any non-sense argument and all the shit you hate about her and fuck her with it, believe me she'll handcuff herself next time and turn herself in to you and beg you to dominate her :D :D
dude you'll never win outside the bedroom, so you have to be patient outside till she's in your battlefield, then it's all yours, win the fuck out of it :D

- now in the common "logic": not all people are mature enough or relationship materials, it's about finding the middle ground and work as a team and be honest and transparent, try to understand that both parties are living souls and deserve to be treated good and equal !

pick the one that you think is more reasonable :P :D

Anonymous · Answer

'Take the lead ' sound kinda weird and dominating. Just be more assertive and protecting of her , voice your opinion and if she is unsure of something try to come to a decision that would be good for the both of you. Anything more than that becomes somewhat unhealthy and controlling.
Every man is different though , there is nothing wrong with not being super dominant and want to be in control of everything. Those kind of things can't be forced and need to just naturally flow , and when you find the right person these personality traits go in sync with each other and you wouldn't even think about it.

JSmuve · Answer

A lot of women crave to be led. They want you to ask them out, they want you to plan the date, they want you to pay, they want you to talk about being exclusive, they want you to initiate sex. Any important decision in the relationship, they want you to decide. Sure, they want to voice their opinion but they don't want the responsibility of having to make the final decision.

So to lead in a relationship, you want to ask for a woman's opinion when its warranted but you have to make your own decision.

rjroy3 · Answer

In short, it's initiating and taking the lead

1. Clearly define what your personal values are.
2. Clearly define your boundaries.
3. Uphold those boundaries when she ppushes against them (because she will) instead of caving, because you feel some type of way
4. Define the terms of your relationship and be upfront with what you want and where you stand.

It's about proactively dictating the pace of the relationship instead of falling into something you don't want.

Ilvmycountryman · Answer

He takes care of me
He supports me
No cheating
No Lying
Is always truthful honesty
Helps me
Loves me just the way I am and for who I am
Always there for me
Forgives me
Is loyal
Cuddle with me
Protect me
Etc

Kinky time :
Whispers in my ear
Touches me
Massages me
Doesn't let me go
We moan
Calls me babe , baby girl , and etc
Tells me I'm sexy etc
And etc

PinkMichae · Answer

Why do you have too. A relationship is a partnership which no one takes the lead. It's not like a parent/child relationship where you do take the lead.

crazy8000 · Answer

If she comes with this stuff that you must be certain thing's, move on without her.
She doesn't want you, only some ideal person thought together in her mind.
You will never fitt the criteria!

To take charge is to lead, do thing's without asking for promotion to do it or get confirmation that you should do it or not or if it's okay.

It's a mindframe, an attitude that shows outward in your actions without being insecure if you should or shouldn't.

TripleAce · Answer

See how he just waved his hand and she came to him like a good little girl Ya lol

idontlikeuanymorex · Answer

I personally dont like someone in the relationship to take the lead, or have to feel like they need to. It should be equal from both sides

davidiam · Answer

First grab the wine so it doesn't spill then work your way from her neck down while not removing any of her clothes and tease her in a good way with simple kisses and work that hand magic til she can't take it anymore

Words_and_Wisdom · Answer

Do what comes natural. If leading is natural to you, you will lead. If not, then find a woman who's able to lead. Don't force yourself into a role you're not willing to take.

Ellie-V · Answer

You just go out and buy yourself an animal. Because that’s what you want. You don’t want a real woman. Or better yet, adopt a child.

thatdude88 · Answer

I mean nobody really has to be dominate in a relationship. It can be fun in bed sure but in a relationship it kinda ruins shit. Just be cool about it and let it flow.

Makeuphoarder · Answer

Make plans , take the initiative. If you know her interests. Don't be afraid to initiate contact more often.

kaskas19 · Answer

I don't know. I dont like leaders in relationships. I prefer it to be equal.

Jesslin412 · Answer

Push her back and start kissing on her! I wish he’d do that to me so bad! I don’t like making moves or asking for kisses. Just do it already!

Alice2398 · Answer

By saying no sometimes and using his own initiative to make plans and do things in the relationship as well

HornetsFanAllDay · Answer

I don't like to dominate anyone. if I ever get in a relationship I'd like it to be mutual. nobody dominates anyone

Pamina · Answer

By confusing his relationship with his job, appartently.

SixFootSexy · Answer

Sorry what was the question? I was too busy focused on the photo of the girl about to drop that guy's pants and swallow his future babies lol

Joeisasking · Answer

Leading is when you share your ideas and somebody agrees with them and decides to work for it together, that's the whole point of a relationship

serious · Answer

I am not sure, unless he is assertive by nature. He won't do it.

qwertykeyboardirldub · Answer

Stop listening to her shit if she doesn't do what she is told dump her destroy her ability to communicate with you Ie block her on all social medias and block her number ghost her

Hispanic-Cool-Guy · Answer

Be strong and a man of conviction. Make sure to avoid the rebellious women, those woman are stubborn as hell and will just bring stress and try to undermine you as a man.

Gwesn · Answer

I think this is depending of both partners into the relationship. Nowadays, men are more here to support women who are reclaiming main decision. But if any partner has something to say, it will say in a way or another in any case...

suhassup · Answer

He takes lead by liking her truly and showing concern for her and caring her more than anything without knowing about this to her. just love her a lot

skeetskeetskeet · Answer

If you have to ask you'll never know... Being a boss isn't a learned behavior really

DamnMan · Answer

Well, if he's in a relationship, he most likely all ready did.

JenniferAllen · Answer

why do you want to be a leader.. you just have to try to love

captain_voidwalker · Answer

It starts with realizing that in the relationship you are the prize, to women is dead weight.

mT2359 · Answer

He doesn't. He is allowed to live in a delusional world where he thinks that his opinion matters.

JesseTheMan · Answer

Slap some sense into a hoe and be a manly man. Said no one ever

BOUNTYGUY9 · Answer

whips/ ropes /handcuffs /gag/lube / blindfold / l love a submissive girl

valualty · Answer

By drawing a line to b. s from day one. And having a mutual understanding.

tekoni · Answer

Be dominate... that's it ur the man take action don't make her slave but be dominate out of love and compassion

Anonymous · Answer

Correct her severely when she does something wrong.

DoctorWize · Answer

"I want you to be mine."

damman · Answer

It should be equal there should not be a dominant partner

LuiLeeuwtje · Answer

These days, only if his partner clearly states she wants him to.

lomimore · Answer

Be bold and dominant.

Daddy_Sai · Answer

We start with asserting our dominance

boulshyte · Answer

he doesn't. the women just makes him think he does

9teen · Answer

I guess that happens naturally.

berihamb · Answer

No need to lead-this is a relation not a job

LeaLee · Answer

I thought it was instinct

Volvagia · Answer

play follow the leader with u bein the leader

bubblegummybear · Answer

By getting himself a submissive girl

EmiyaUBW · Answer

Step 1: acquire a relationship... Shiiiiiit

daydreammarie · Answer

Be a man.

noperoo · Answer

You have to be smarter to call the better shots

YingDomo04 · Answer

Asks you out, being a gentle man

nabiel · Answer

By being kind to he's lady

Lakshay006 · Answer

By being soft to girl and loyal hearted 👍🏻🥂

Anonymous · Answer

He grows a pair of balls

Jasmine_IV · Answer

You just do it.

Anonymous · Answer

Donkey Kong!

chad996 · Answer

Have a gameplan

How does a man take the lead in his relationship?

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