What were some cultural customs you’ve learned in a interracial relationship?

[JC103]

Have you ever been in a interracial relationship? If so, what were some of the cultural customs you learned?

[TurboKid]

Quite a bunch. Well, all my relationships were sort of interracial. But, for example, I learned what "player" meant with my first girlfriend who was black. She asked me if I was a player and I thought she was talking about video games. Then she laughed and explained it to me.

[JC103]

Lol were/are you a player?

[TurboKid]

Dated girl in Texas. She taught me how to square-dance and follow these types of customs at bars playing country music. Dated a French one and she taught me a lot of things but I think I forgot all of them. I just remember she said some of the things I did were considered rude by French customs.

[TurboKid]

No, not at all! Maybe I was a serial monogamist at best. I got into lots of relationships as a result of my work requiring me to move to new places all the time.

[JC103]

My job had me flying everywhere I’m so sick of flying lol

[TurboKid]

Same. Actually, I ended up settling down and getting married not too long after I permanently moved to Tokyo and stopped taking jobs that require me to fly overseas. It's like I just had to stay in one place.

I'm finding my memory slipping on this Q though. I didn't do a good job memorizing all the customs and mannerisms and things my exes taught me since after we stopped dating, I was in a new place and having to learn a brand new set and kind of unlearn the old set.

[JC103]

The Japanese have a lot of customs

[TurboKid]

Most of those were familiar to me since I'm from here (born and raised). That said, I missed my teenage years in Japan (went to Singapore and the US for my teens) and I'm also half-white. So that made it feel interracial even when I dated Japanese, and actually, Japanese girls also taught me some adult Japanese customs that I didn't know as a child.

[JC103]

Such as?

[TurboKid]

I forgot. They've become sort of second nature now and also my friends taught me some, and I forgot which ones I picked up from my friends and which from girlfriends. Most of the time it's like I did something very rude by accident in the culture and they're like, "Don't do that!" Oh, one I remember now that my ex taught me involved how to pay respects at a shrine. There was a ritual to it like you hit the gong and bow three times and something like that.

[TurboKid]

Also at those fancy restaurants, they give you like a gazillion spoons and forks and knives. And I remember one of my exes taught me which one to use. Like you work from the outside to the inside... or was it inside to the outside? It was one of those two.

[JC103]

Lol I know just you mean

A lot of my customs are just second nature to me

[TurboKid]

For me, it's like some became second nature and I can't remember exactly how I learned them. Then others I just completely ignored or forgot. For example, my wife tried to teach me about wine-tasting so she took me to some fancy place. And then they brought us endless samples of wine but you were supposed to just taste the wine and spit it out! Whattt! They had a bucket below our table to spit out the wine. But I just ignored that custom because it seemed like a waste. Then I got all tipsy and happy and was like high-fiving the waitresses.

[JC103]

Lol I swear they make stuff up sometimes. I’ll be listening to some of their reviews and I’m just like “are we tasting the same wine” lol

[TurboKid]

I kept wanting to see what would happen if I pranked like one of the experts by pouring the cheapest wine into a super expensive bottle and see if they can tell.

[JC103]

Bro! I’m way ahead of you lol

I have this $500 bottle waiting for this snobby ass people to come and try. Once that’s all gone, I’ll swap it out lol

[TurboKid]

Lemme know how it goes! I'm really curious.

[JC103]

You have to do it too lol

[dudeinohio]

I've been in several. Really haven't learned any customs.