Opinions of my mother in law?

[Anonymous]

Let me disclaim i am currently 8 months pregnant so my hormones may play a part into this. Recently i went on a family trip with my S/O and his family. We were at Seaworld , and my body was overheating most of the day. So me and my S/O argued about something i can't even remember what and he started pinching me to make me not mad or upset or whatever. Thing is it left bruises he says my skin marks really easy im light skinned but still left two bruises. He started the hitting/marking first so thats when i decided i would start hitting from that day forward too. Fast forward two days still on the trip , we went to a river and i was very upset how my S/O was only doing what his family wanted to do on the trip not anything i wanted. So when we got off the car i threw his shirt at him and then he started laughing at me i punched his arm and he started pinching me leaving TWO MORE bruises once i saw the bruise turn into a green bump i started crying immediately. Eventually he grabbed some ice and started rubbing it on my arm his dad saw and asked what happened to my arm and i pointed to my S/O and his mom butts in WITH NO CLUE OF WHO STARTED HITTING FIRST and said it was both of our faults since we play harshly and we should not be hitting each other not even playfully and walks off basically validating his point. I said to my S/O i dont need anyones opinion ( especially from someone who doesn't know the background of the situation) and he replied with a smartass remark saying “ and thats why you have those bruises” later on , i call my mom and start telling her what happened because no one had my back my S/O has his support system but where was mine? Then he starts telling his mom why im crying and says I STARTED HITTING HIM i looked at him while i was on the phone & started yelling at him , and said dont lie to your mom. And the mom says “ stop fighting “ and i said no you always defend him ( continuing story in comments)

Updates

+1 y

Because he likes to tell me i can't wear certain things or not let me wear things out and his mom has agreed with him before. She said no i dont take sides i help both of y'all. Then my S/O told his mom my family is toxic and all we do is talk crap and so much stuff and that my mom says stuff about his mom so i said okay hold on i put my mom on the speaker , and said do you talk about ( says S/O name) mom? And she said i dont even know her to be talking about her? So stop he needs to keep-

Updates

+1 y

Me out of his mouth his mom asked what she said and misunderstood took it as my mom said “ i dont even wanna know her” and said oh well we dont either thats fine “ like? Wtf from there i just got pissed and now I don't know what to think or if im wrong or what opinions please?

[natured]

Look, I don't mean to offend you but wtf is this kindergarden?
Like, ALL of you together neer serious help.
Starting from your S/O, who tf does he think he is leaving marks on you? And who tf does he think he is not protecting you or having your back? He needs therapy. I seriously understand that you are pregnant and that you have all the hormones going on but in this case it's best to stay alone with your S/O and clear things out before the baby comes.
You don't want your baby to grow in a toxic environment do you?
Do y'all even think about the baby or you guys just bicker around throwing idiotic comments to one another?
C'mon now, grow up.

[Asker]

Non - taken trust me i feel as much as a child as u describe especially being pregnant. I asked him last night if we could move out in less than two months because i can't stand living with his family anymore his mother complains about an ice tray not being filled up or if we forgot to do something and whenever she calls the family to eat she specifically says my S/O name not mine. He tells me he's the only one working so i can't be rushing him but it will happen? But like when because i can't stand another minute in this damn house. Im so miserable , and i get embarassed to eat what she cooks because i feel like she doesn't want me there. I want everything to work out so this baby can come out when i can say things are going great but for the love of god i can't stand another minute in this house with other people.

[natured]

DEAR LORD i'm so sorry, I didn't know you guys actually live all together.
Holly cow I'm having goosebumps because trust me I have been through the very same. I was lucky enough to not get pregnant but I was through the exact same. Feeling like a burden, and keeping me just because i'm his GIRL... But the difference is that my S/O got my back always , he protected me from his moms childish tantrums , even though him protecting me caused MORE DRAMA, I still felt good... LOOK, I know it sounds impossible, but you two better get out of there as soon as possible.
TELL YOUR PARTNER that you'd rather live in a small one room appartment rather than with his parents.
Trust me, if he loves you and your baby he will understand and do something about it.
Wish you the best of luck.

[Asker]

Thank you , I've been looking into apartments near my area but lord jesus its complicated finding one & my S/O is a family man he loves his family & thinks they do no wrong but I don't know what to say to that tbh.

[natured]

I understand he is a family man, but he is creating a family of his own, and this is when he needs to MAN UP AND BE A MAN TO HIS OWN GOD DAMN FAMILY.
My guy is also a Family Man, but I was his weak spot, if anyone just looked at me in a bad way he would attack them like serpents.
Please get out of there, I hope you guys can figure it out. Trust me, even the relationship with your IN-laws will improve once you're out.
Good luck

[boggboss]

Lol oh this relationship is going to last long 🤣 this is abusive behaviour that u think doing the same back to him will help is crazy

[boggboss]

This relationship is a joke your with a controlling guy that pinches u to make u act the way he wants this is abusive behavior why u decided to get pregnant from him just shows how silly you are here things won't get better

[Asker]

I still want my kid dont get me wrong , but if i could go back and choose someone else knowing everything i know now i would.

[boggboss]

Well thats too late and u don't have that choice he will be a abusive parent he has already shown himself to feel the need pinch u as a way to submit to what he wants whilst telling u what u can and can't wear why would u settle down for that

[Asker]

May sound stupid but only reason i stay is because of my kid. I had grown up with both parents and to take away that experience would crush me. Me and him had not hit each other or anything until that day that he started pinching me. We had been doing good until his mom started butting in and i talked to my mom and she was opening my eyes telling me my S/O is not worried if im having fun or not because he thinks if i wanna be upset oh well so he goes and has his fun. Which for the record became true because he admitted to it.

[boggboss]

I see sorry to hear that