Is it wrong for women to want a relationship in this day and age?

Question

Is it bad to even seek a relationship nowadays because society is more open to just casual sex then commitment. Why bother if you know what’s going to happen?

SunnyFlorida · Accepted Answer

@justneedtokno I'm going to say the problem is with your selection of men. There are lots of men who want a steady, monogamous relationship with a woman. However, women will often reject these men to pursue more "exciting" men. The problem is that other women had the same "bright idea," so multiple women are chasing after the same man. The man's no fool, so he sleeps with multiple women in a friends with benefits relationship. As part of human evolution, when women repeatedly have sex with a man the woman becomes emotionally attached to that man. This was probably biological evolution, so that a woman's children would have the best chance of survival (in a primitive world). After a woman develops emotional attachment due to sex with a man, the woman expects the man to CHANGE and alter the agreed to friends with benefits. The problem is the men the women selected do not have a motivation to change. Since the man the woman chose only wants friends with benefits, the woman incorrectly generalizes that ALL men only want friends with benefits. In reality, the woman rejected the men who wanted a relationship.  The men who are good looking and highly desirable, who want a monogamous relationship are in a monogamous relationship. Sometimes a foolish woman will let such a man go, but women are often smarter than that. Change your selection of men, before having sex, have a sex talk about your desire for a monogamous relationship. When dating men, don't have "sex with the ex." It will cause you to behave inappropriately and drive away good men.

Jamie05rhs · Accepted Answer

No, it's not wrong. But wanting something and demanding it are two different things. That's where y'all f*ck up. You're too passive. You don't actually demand what you want.

Brainsbeforebeauty · Answer

Never conform to society.. Too many people do, and that's why things are as fucked up as they are

Anonymous · Answer

I dont understand many guys on gag, youtube (red pill, conservative community on youtube).
They dont want "easy girls" but also want to sleep on the first date. They dont want women to test them aka play games with them but also try to have sex with her on the first date to test her. They use dates to have sex with a woman instead of marrying her but also wonder why there is no woman to marry and complain about women being whores or being bad. They dont want promiscuos women and hate hook up culture but they are also part of the hook up culture since they sleep around or they have sex on the first date or one night stands but complain when women do the same.
They dont want to take responsibility when it comes having sex since they blame women for having sex with men as if men can't say no and as if men are kids
They want traditional submissive women but also want to have sex before marriage and call her golddigger for expecting him to provide her aka pay for things but also insult working career financiall independent woman as feminazis who pay her own things.
They hate onlyfans, sexworkers etc. but also use their service by paying them or by only watching which makes it get more popular and klicks. Dont watch or support it, if you dont want to sex work exist since demand makes the supply.
They hate it when women dont makes the first step or approach but also want traditional submissive passive women who want a traditional men since traditionally men approach etc.
In my culture we date to get to know eachother and wait till marriage.
Unfortunately many western men would not do that and there also many guys who would just want to date for sex which confuses many American girls since they get fuckzoned

I can go on but i think everyone gets my point. The best way to know if a guy does not use you for sex is if he waits with you till marriage. Other than that you only can assume.
I can't generalize and so i am just summarizing male's gagers and red pillers opinions and add my comments to these opinions.
If i offended anyone i am sorry.

sumayathemagi · Answer

From a biological point of view, in generally girls don't have sex drive as like men. Girls get horny but women's horniness is totally different than men horniness. When men feel instinctive urge, desire, craving for sex, sexual intimacy, oral sex, another women body it’s call men horniness. But women don't feel it. Women's horniness means **desire to orgasm**. The urge to have sex with men, desire, craving for sex, sexual intimacy, craving for men body is totally absent in their horniness. You can compare it to urge to pee. It's just a physical itch. But there is no mental, psychological urge, desire, craving for sex, sexual intimacy, men body. That's why you often see women are totally indifferent to sex, sexual intimacy because women can get horny but women don’t feel desire to have sex, craving for sex.

That's the difference between men horniness and women's horniness. Women often say they get horny often. But their horniness means nothing, it’s just acknowledging something itching. That’s it.
If you drink less water in the hot day you will get the same itch in your lower belly, that's why women can't recognise it.

Even you often see guys always check out women, stare at women, watch porn, see nude photos of women but women are totally disinterested in this chapter/section. It’s because women only lust after their husband, boyfriend or familiar person. You know this is a long term process.

Until women get their boyfriend, husband or a familiar person their brain don't even know there is such a thing like lust. I am saying, seeing random men whom they never met before does nothing for women, it’s like seeing shoes, bus, dolls etc. Totally indifferent glance. So, don't waste time to know the fiction that women lust after men body.
It’s just a fiction.

Anonymous · Answer

Girls and women should still have faith that there are good guys and good men out there. By saying, good guys and good men, I don't mean some overweight, push over man. I have been scorned by many girls in my life and those girls got scorned by idiots in her life. Doesn't mean we should repeat the cycle. Let me say that again, it does not mean we repeat the same cycle. I don't give a fuck how people act these days, if people want to be fake, act rude and look for "casual" relationships they just want any sort of satisfaction to fill an empty void and that's losing faith. Just because its normalized in society doesn't make it right. Many people who behave that way, living life vicariously, when their heads lay on their pillows at night I'm sure they are not proud of it but they think well everyone else does it, then it becomes a constant struggle. Same case goes for how we look at money, how we look at political parties/leaders, relationships, or whatever the case may be. One day, things will change for the better.

Alyssa11 · Answer

People of all sorts are actively seeking a relationship, just as some other people only want casual relationships.

You shouldn't stop yourself from wanting something just because of other people. If it's something you really want, you deserve it, and you should stay hopeful about it and aim to pursue it in your life.

People talk about all sorts of goals nowadays, like career goals and financial goals, but relationship goals is a THING. And if it's something you really want, you should pursue it just as you would pursue other things.

I really want a husband and a family. The guys that have been coming into my life? Trash!!! But I'm not giving up until I meet my person because this is something I want, just as much as I wanted my journalism career.

Jlegacy · Answer

I dated a girl once and we broke up but still hooked up after that. I soon realised that I couldn't commit to anyone until I dealt with the hurts I housed inside. So one day I told her exactly that and she was still willing to hook up.

Secondly a friend I loved suddenly offered herself for sex.

Then I paid a girl for sex.

I soon realised that, I'm someone who wouldn't settle for less. Love is not a myth. Love is of God and so I knew there was a way to find the one I truly desired and a purely sexual relationship would be the death of me. I'm a poet and a romantic, I really can't be a friends with benefits.

So is it normal and okay? 100 percent YES

nella965 · Answer

yea , its like guys would willingly sleep around on first dates with women. but then , they would turn around and say " i don't want to date women who sleep around". Its the hypocrisy which is a sign that patriarchy is still alive

HawkPerception · Answer

I've only had 2 girlfriends in my life. Both were and are long relationships and I've never hooked up. Not every guy out there only wants hook ups. I will say though that the majority of PEOPLE (not just guys) in this world are not really philosophical or intelligent. Most behave for immediate pleasure and don't think about what makes them happy in the long run. Most people are not introspective enough to see how to better themselves and any time someone disagrees with their perspective or finds something about the person they don't like, they shut them out of their life. The key to finding someone great that is willing to stick it through thick and thin with you is honestly to better yourself and your views on life. Birds of a feather flock together. The better you are yourself, the better energy you'll attract.

KrakenAttackin · Answer

I don't even know what a "relationship" is this day in age.

Modern women have a lot of sex with many different men, you have loads of "guy friends", social media profiles showing getting wasted, half-naked, grinding away... but you want a "relationship". Why?

In my mind a relationship means a very deliberate reduction of attention and contact with the opposite gender, it means being monogamous, not dressing in a way designed to attract more attention, and centering your attention around ONE other person.

I really don't think modern women really want a "relationship". I think you want a man as a financial and social safety net.

PeacefulRainDrop · Answer

No its not as long as you find a partner that wants the same! If he doesn't want to commit you know he's not the man for you.. can't change someone! If anyone expects you to compromise cause your being selfish cause you dont want to share your man then you know thats a waste of time for both of you.. so figure out what the other person thinks about committed relationships before you get too invested. Then if they want an open relationship say well I hope you find that! I am not the lady for you... Good luck! I litterly asked that before asking about his job or anything.. just asked him how are you before hand.. if you dont see eye to eye there's no point getting to know each other

VanillaSalt · Answer

Bad no… but men don’t care. Here’s what your in competition with… other women making all women look bad like divorcees that take a mans money and kids, feminists because if you fall into that mindset I deserve it’s hard to see the real truth… no matter what you think of yourself a man might not value you the same, gay is mainstream now and even just 4-5% of the population is a huge number of men off limits, mgtows that are off the market (seems to be approximately 40% of men not actively dealing a relationship… with the remaining men who’s out for just sex? Who don’t meet your standards? Who isn’t attracted to you? So what if there’s 2 men for every 1 woman looking for a relationship? Don’t mean you won’t feel 40% of men not interested in looking.

darkcloud1945 · Answer

For me what rules apply to me apply to you. Most men are afraid of a woman who knows what she want and goes for it. Quite refreshing but shakes most men that think it is their domain to want a relationship and not the other way around. People forget not only guy think of sex and all the good stuff that happen but women think the same things guys do. A guy looks at a girls crotch and wonders what if looks and how it would feel girls look at a guys crotch and wonders how big and how it would feel.. So a dirty old mans advice is go for it and if it happen GO FOR IT

Kaamraj · Answer

There is nothing wrong for women to want a relationship, just like there is nothing wrong with men to want sexual intimacy, however, want doesn't mean demand or deserve. The overall evolutionary truth is that sexual attraction follows the pareto principle, that 90 % of the women are attracted to the top 10 % of men, and by extension 90% of men are invisible to 90% of women. So it's the top 10% of men who have all the choices and the right to exercise those choices. They're not going to settle down, just because someone wants them to.

Cotton555 · Answer

I think that it is not wrong for wanting a relationship. I mean everybody can't be the same. Some might want a relationship and some might just want to have fun but it is important to be you.

In this day and age I feel it is more important to be you and accept who you and what you are. So no it is not wrong

Renegade_Sailor · Answer

Feminists did women dirty, they tricked you into giving up all of the benefits of being a woman, encouraged slutty non commital behavior, then told you that big is beautiful trying to make you destroy the natural value that you're born with.

In the end what do women get out of the deal? To grow old and unhappy? To struggle through relationships, to wind up childless, single and miserable herding cats?

That is the future many have to look forward to today.

If this might be your future, you had best starting working damn hard to prevent it!

PoliteSpeaker · Answer

ME: "Are you hurting anyone?"
You: "No."
Me: "Then make a definite decision to get what you want. Not a decision. A definite decision."

You can have what you want but you need to make a decision first. You haven't made one. If you belief it isn't possible it won't happen.

Mary087 · Answer

It’s not wrong but it’s sad to expect a lot since dating isn’t like how it used to be and it’s scary to get your hopes up and be happy once things are going well and you find out he doesn’t wanna be serious or isn’t on the same page. I believe loyalty is tough to find.

Browneye57 · Answer

Naw, YOU get to decide what's right for YOU.
There as just as many guys that want the same thing - you have to vet the prospect to find one worthy, on the same page.
Be up front about what you want, and stick to it.

And don't be going for the bad-boyz, the fukboyz, that are just in it for the sex.

cth96190 · Answer

It is hard wired into us to want a relationship.
The problem with modern Western women is that (Marxist) Feminism has taught women to loathe men and to go against their own female biology.
Women, as a collective, have chosen to become so hostile, obnoxious, insufferable and dangerous to be around that every day more men walk away and go MGTOW monk.

Dragonpurple · Answer

It is not wrong, in fact I have often wondered how people can do the sex with no strings attached. I get too attached myself and would feel guilty if I just used someone for their body.

I have never done it, I wouldn't even know how to go about it. When I was single I considered it and was clueless. I'm not a very out going person, the quiet shy type.

It takes a bit for me to warm up to someone but then I am fiercely loyal.

Woke51 · Answer

If you know what's going to happen, it's called a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Think about it: is it really possible to know what's going to happen?

Long term relationships are the greatest virtue of life, to me at least.

Savage_Wisdom · Answer

Casual sex is ultimately meaningless, so there's no shame in seeking something more serious.

backblueblack22 · Answer

Of course it isn’t. But society also tells you that’s is okay to have inflated standards.

It’s okay to have standards. But think hard about what you can provide vs. what he has. Are you holding him to a higher standard than you hold yourself? The acid test question is “would you date yourself?”

t-8900 · Answer

It means you're a good person and you are holding yourself to a higher standard. I'm there now too and the same thoughts always go through my head so you aren't alone. But being a man with emotions seems like an undesirable in society and to women so I just drift away. I do what I can to improve myself daily but I don't want think it's the vet going to be enough for a woman to look my way
The standard for beauty are so out of touch with reality

FilmGuy93 · Answer

It's not wrong at all for you to want that. Society is in a weird place right now, sexually. We've got a bunch of people who do the casual sex thing because they're scared of getting hurt. It doesn't seem like anyone is actually enjoying it though. If what you want is to find genuine love; then do so without fear of being judged. It is so much more wholesome to go through life trying to make a connection than it is trying to have a few orgasms and a paycheck.

St37xy11 · Answer

There are guys looking for a relationship/serious relationship. Don't change your beliefs and values because of the whores out there

AmeerX · Answer

80-90% people still value marriage around the world. Stop making US the sole role model

Phoenix98 · Answer

Not at all you should never apologize or think it’s wrong to hold yourself to a higher standard or want something meaningful.

Take your time and find someone worth your time and effort, find the right one.

Sincerly_KittyCat · Answer

Yes it still makes sense since not everyone likes hook up culture and different people have different faith's and beliefs.

TheFlak38 · Answer

whatever women do, the government, society and their armies of white knights support. When a man says he doesn't want a relationship he's immediately attacked and shamed. you're gay, you have a small dick, you're a sexist pig, you hate women, you're selfish. all this dumb castration language women love to use.

Subarugirl · Answer

Why wouldn't it happen? There are good people out there who want a healthy relationship, you just have to be willing to look.

Yaharro · Answer

Girls stop saying you don't find good relationship just because guys only want sex you are the one who are agreed to have sex in ther first place sleeping with multiple guys sending nude showing your ass on the internet like a hoe dating is become an excuse for sex if guys getting easy sex then why not? hookup culture is destroying you and true meaning of the love and relationship with apps like only fan, instagram, snapchat, tinder through the time you will loose "respect"

DizzyDesii · Answer

You just have to have hope and be smart with who you choose to date

Anonymous · Answer

It's a sick world. This degeneracy of faking love for one night sex only took over and real love vanished to the point, that people aren't trying anymore to find real love. If you conform to them, you might as well be joining them.

19magic · Answer

I just think if you like a guy and he seems to like you give it up sooner rather than later then if he sticks around he's definitely into you and if he doesn't then it doesn't matter and you haven't wasted your time

the_kisses_of_sun · Answer

I'm like you and can't play the game of no strings without getting attached. I want a relationship and it's normal. I think it's difficult to find someone who is not after sex only but I guess it will work out someday.

Cherrylicious · Answer

I want a relationship but it seems like most guys only want sex with no commitment it's annoying.

TommyMountainFigure · Answer

Not at all. If you want a stable relationship then that is what you should hold out for. There are many guys who want the same, even if they don't admit it.

TwinkleLily5 · Answer

It’s not wrong to want a relationship. Do what’s right for you, Date people who want the same as you (if you find out they don’t) move on and date waste your time.

Asianguy123 · Answer

it seems like hook up could take good care of sexual needs these days. why do you go through hardship with relationship? I mean relationship has lots of hurtles. it's very hard sometimes. so just have a f buddy and be happy. and if you can't attract anyone after you get older, use someone as an escort. I have seen men escorting women in a website. He will take good care of you.

Grond21 · Answer

The only people who can play the game with no emotional attachment are those who have damaged their hearts, or locked them behind so many walls that they can't see past them anymore to form the deep connections.

TheSpaceGnome · Answer

No. Also people who have casual sex are a very small minority (rather like gays, bis, trans, etc. very vocal online, but very small in number).
More than 90% of the population has normal relationships.

ChiPaPa · Answer

No. There are plenty of people that want relationships and plenty that don't. Unfortunately, many people are not honest about their intentions.

HighValue · Answer

Wanting a good lasting exclusive relationship is still good. You just have to be a good person and didn't do hook ups or casual stuff yourself in your past either if you want a good exclusive person.

CordetteMonet · Answer

No, there's nothing wrong with that wish. And there are many people who want committed relationships nowadays (like myself).

slatyb · Answer

Wrong? You can want whatever. Don't despair. Most of my unmarried friends are in long-term relationships.

Wester1967 · Answer

As long as a woman can get 1/2 of all assets if, on a whim, she decides to divorce, then don’t be surprised when relationships don’t go anywhere past the opening stages

Dchrls78104 · Answer

Not wrong, as long as genuine love and commitment are your aim.

Wiredone · Answer

It's not wrong. There are guys out there that are still interested in a relationship

Janessa2021 · Answer

Honestly with the way guys are absolutely fuckin lutely but I know all men aren't the same. And I've learned not to seek a relationship but to let a good man find me a good relationship will follow and prosper

HOAAH · Answer

Not wrong to want a loving and committed relationship. Also it is not impossible.

emilym12345 · Answer

Although I said I gave up on dating it would be nice to find love ngl. I don’t do hook ups so men often get mad when I say no because I have an undeserving bad reputation.

clampfan101 · Answer

I think anyone who feels ready for a relationship should feel free to seek one out.

Anonymous · Answer

Men are not trustable in this age. This is the fact. So, yes it is not good to expect from them a relationship that requires trust. They always want have multiple women in their life.

lightbulb27 · Answer

no, stick to your values. handing out "free candy" is part of the problem.

Ninani · Answer

Seek whatever you want, there are plenty of like-minded people.

SomeGuyCalledTom · Answer

Society is what we make it. Relationships are healthy and generally desirable, despite public lamentations to the contrary.

Toldol2 · Answer

Not a bad idea. Ils just people are stressed out and its hard to give and receive.

Dog87 · Answer

There's nothing wrong with wanting a relationship. Sex isn't everything and when you get that right teammate you wouldn't have it any other way it's magic

YHL6965 · Answer

No, you just have to find the right person for you.

Is it wrong for women to want a relationship in this day and age?

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