Is it normal to date 40 year old at 16?

[Anonymous]

My daughter is 16 and is telling me she's seeing a 40 year old man older than both me and my husband. Not sure what to do think.

[aWes0MeNeSs]

No, and any 40-year-old that takes an interest in teens is a massive red flag, even if you're in an area where 16 is the age of consent. There is an obvious power imbalance in a relationship between a 16-year-old and a 40-year-old, not to mention that it's disturbing for a middle-aged adult to be attracted to children. In every case of a relationship I've ever seen with one person being several years into adulthood and the other being a teen, the older person was either A) extremely emotionally immature to the point of being unable to relate to their own age, B) a control freak who likes the fact that teens are extremely impressionable and easy to control and manipulate, or C) all of the above. I've never seen a healthy and/or normal relationship like that. It's one thing for two fully grown adults to have an age gap, but when one person is several years (even decades) into adulthood and the other is a child who doesn't even have a fully developed brain yet, it's abnormal and not good news. Obviously, a 16-year-old has next to no life experience, and even a 16-year-old who is "so mature for his/her age" is still only 16 with minimal experience, and will typically be more trusting and naive (which makes teens such easy prey for adults with controlling and manipulative personalities).

Assuming you aren't a troll, try to put a stop to this relationship. Look up the laws in your area if you aren't aware of them already, because even if the legal age of consent is 16, many of those places have Romeo & Juliet laws which make it to where any adult over a certain age cannot have a sexual relationship with any minors.

[btbc92]

Your PARENTS! What the heck are you two doing. Are you letting your 16-year-old daughter be involved with a man around the same age as you and your husband? I would tell you what I think. I think I would get the cops involved, find out who that man is and his butt would be investigated if this is true. And if this man touches her, that's rape. And if you two condone this, you two would be in serious trouble, more and likely for child abuse and neglect. That is strictly illegal and it cannot happen. Why do parents become parents and don't know how to parent?

[simonqq]

Agree that it's messed up but it's not illegal in a big portion of Europe. As a parent though you need to teach your children about these things, not sure if this question is real or not either. It would mean her parents became parents as young teens.

If actually true they need a serious discussion with their daughter.

[btbc92]

@simonqq We ain't in Europe man. that is twisted even over there. We are in America. That is highly damaging for a minor to be having sexual relations with an older man like that. Many of those "relationships" do not last and it's detrimental to a person's health. Especially for women. That guy is grooming her. Firstly, teaching them is not enough. You have to enforce rules and expectations and let them know how very dangerous it is. You can teach your children anything, but at the age of 16, most teens already have their minds made up for what they wanted to do. Because if this was ever okay, why did she had to hid the fact she is seeing a much older man and never asked her parents permission? because there are no BOUNDARIES. if my parents found out I ever did that, thank God I didn't because I knew better. My butt would have been in serious trouble or whipped, and that guy would have gone to jail for rape. The state I live in is 18 as the legal age. So is the state I moved from. Guess what? his butt would be charged with rape and he would be registered as a sex offender. These old pervs know what they're doing. And these "kids" know also.

[simonqq]

How do you know it's america? I'm not American and the poster is anonymous. You are assuming many things. Like I said I think it's wrong but it's still not illegal in many places on earth and gag is mixed while for sure many if not the majority at this point is American.

She did tell her parents and I don't think any teen ever asks for permission in who they see that's unreasonable to ask for. Parenting is complex and personally I find that being forceful is rarely the solution and can backfire. Teaching and building trust so they don't hide things and come to you for advice is the approach I value most.

In this case a discussion with her to get the full picture of why she is seeing this man. Then from that decide what approach to take. The last thing you want is her to feel alienated and run to him instead.

Anyway parenting is complex and we clearly have different ideas of what is best as a parent to do but we can both agree that something has to be done. They as parents has to step up big time.

[btbc92]

@simonqq Most people on here are American, and many talks regarding situations like this are American in nature. If these people were from Europe, they could have easily stated that and what is considered legal where they are at. That is not the case with this question. Even if it was Europe. You still report it and call the cops. I am pretty sure they have laws given the minor protective rights. We are not talking about many places on earth. We are talking about America as a whole.

"She did tell her parents and I don't think any teen ever asks for permission in who they see that's unreasonable to ask for." I did. My friends did. And many others. See. PARENTING. If your parents do not care, which is considered permissive parenting, it is bad for the children. She only told her parents AFTER already seeing the man. I would always ask and that was expected of me. Thank God my mom taught me that, it spared me the heartache and getting involved with the wrong boys. I was not allowed to date until 18 and it helped me in many ways. Weeded out of lot of gots and one cheater.

That is not unreasonable. They are the PARENTS. They make the rules who you can and cannot see. That's parenting. It may sound controlling. But until you an adult or legally married, as I am sure medieval times have taught you that in Europe, you didn't have a say. And if caught, you were introuble. It was to protect you, that person, and their families and your families. It is out of respect because if you're going to be together, you want to make sure it's stable and going to lead somewhere. You live in their house, you follow their rules, or don't live there at all.

[simonqq]

Like I said, very different ideas. Even if not mentioned I don't assume where the poster is from.

It obviously varies from country to country. Where I'm from age of consent is 15 but up until 18 you have some extra protection but it requires a bit more.

About asking for permission that's out of this world in my country. Only in very religious families especially Muslim families that can be the case. Teens have sex quite early here but still we have very low teen pregnancy rates. Again our views are on different spectrums. The only thing I genuinely believe is unarguably wrong is to hit a child as a parent. There's been way too many studies showing the negative effects of that and it includes all disciplinary actions involving spanking or whatever. However beyond that neither you or I can for sure say what works or not (on a big scale).

Nothing of this is really relevant to the post either. Her parents has to do something and we can only hope they do what's best for that girl.

[btbc92]

@simonqq "Parenting is complex and personally I find that being forceful is rarely the solution and can backfire." That is not being forceful. You teach your child this very young. I was taught this by kindergarten and I saw no problems with it. I was always a respectful child and I listened to my parents. Anybody who shamed or mocked me for not rebelling were NOT good influences or people to hang around with anyway. That is not being forceful. It is steering the child in the right direction. Before, it took a village to raise a child. NOW you can't even trust a village without trying to pollute your child. Parenting is not that complex. Once you have a child you must already know how you will raise your kid. This is why traditional ways WORKED. Because the female child would be with other women and learn social scripts as the boys would be with the men and learn their social scripts. By 2 girls learned how to cook, clean, and watch children depending on age, and men would learn carpentry, practical skills, and some even get recruited to learn a trade or be in the army. That's it. You had moral structure and you were to act accordingly depending on rank, social class, and gender. There was order, and there were universal rules everybody followed. Today that is now not the world we live in, and most Godly principles are being fought against by liberal people who are trying to see it gone. But God's word always will remain. No matter how you look at it. This is a dangerous world. And unless you don't care what happens to your kids or what they do. I for one will teach my kids not to be around that. my daughter would be taught to look out for that and they would be protected as well, my sons. If I were to have children. It is not that had to parent. It's if you have principles, morals, standards, etc.

[btbc92]

"Teaching and building trust so they don't hide things and come to you for advice is the approach I value most." How do you think children build trust and respond to teaching? Like dogs and cats, you must establish authority and rules. Children and animals respond to people who have that leadership. That doesn't mean you yell at your kid, or be insensitive. It's having a balance of teaching and discipline. You never overstep without knowing what the issue is. You always study your child, especially personality because not every child is the same. For some children, those who are thinkers need rational reasons to believe you. Feelers like myself need structure as well as empathy. We need to understand why you say what you say and show us that you love us through your actions. Children like people will lie if they want to. I lied if I wanted to. If I lie only I and God knows the reason why I lied. We all have sinned. Let's not pretend we are all innocent. Even you lied because you wanted. If you didn't, you wouldn't have lied. How honest and authentic can you actually be? The myth that the child lies only because they never trusted their parents is not true. That may be for some people, like feelers for an example. But that I found out and I was a kid myself, is false. Many of you did it because you didn't care. Many of you have loving parents. You just wanted to be rebellious. Because if I said, hey, you stealing that candy is wrong and your only doing it because you was mad your mom said no because she had no money. And you felt entitled to it. You would have told me to be quiet and mind your business. And I would have told anybody that you stole, you would have called me a snitch. Please let's be real here. You do it because you wanted to. And the only way to correct the behavior is punishment. That's it. And if you got punished, you got punished for a good reason. You stole. Period.

[btbc92]

"In this case a discussion with her to get the full picture of why she is seeing this man. Then from that decide what approach to take. The last thing you want is her to feel alienated and run to him instead." A discussion wouldn't solve anything. Yes, you talk. But she is "in love" with the guy. She wants what she wants. You really don't know anything about teenage girls. We go for what we want and stubbornly too. It is why you see so many of them go to bad guys while you as a male friend beg her not to, and then she cuts the friendship with you because she feels like your trying to control her sex life. She will feel that way anyway because again, for teenage girls especially. The heart wants what the heart wants while many guys like you are screaming how your single or the girls you want don't want you. They don't change much after high school. This is why they often continue to get those men and you never know why. That is just who she is as a woman. Only she can decide if she wants to change. And sometimes them failing and getting heartbroken or God forbid pregnancy, or disease may be the wake-up call they need. The same sadly with rape. It is wrong, but even with that some women don't wake up and it's sad and harmful. Some men like some women no matter what you teach them. Like the Bible says if I remember correctly, some people are born for destruction.

[btbc92]

@simonqq And this is why we say no. Because you're having sex early and that is a sexual sin. Then when you have problems having a happy marriage, etc. It starts with your first sexual choices. Pregnancy is and never should be a problem. It is natural to have sex and having a child. It shouldn't be condemned as a bad thing. It is how you approach it. And teens should not be having sex unless they are legally married. This is not about ideas. This is about MORALS. And you either have them or you don't. I wasna going to sleep with a man who isn't waiting for marriage to have sex. And that is the point. To safeguard the interest of the girl or the boy. Her parents at this point do not sound like they are in any position to parent because this whole time there was no parenting. So there isn't much they can do now. It is not too late, but the girl is already set in her ways. Even if they shape up, she is already 16. This mess should have been handled before 10 years old. Because that is the threshold years of imprinting. Study psychology. This is the timeframe where most kids want to follow the social cues of their peers and start to ween away from their parents. It's practically too late to do anything. All I can do is pray this girl and the parents snap out of it, or this is not going to end well.

[simonqq]

I'm not going to comment on this whole thing because there's really no point. All I'll say is that traditional ways didn't work and the facts stand behind that. We simply didn't know better. We only started studying childcare in the past 40-50 years meaning we still have a lot to learn. If we knew how to raise children like you said is so simple then everyone would be perfect now. You are stating things that simply is not true and while everyone wants to think their parents raised them well you don't really know that, it maybe worked for you, awesome, but it maybe failed horribly for others.

I didn't say I knew the right way and it would be wise if you realized that you don't know either. We can try our best but we don't know the perfect method if there even is one.

At this point this discussion is not bringing anything to the table. I know your views and you know mine. You think you are right, I'm not going to change your mind. I don't think I'm right but it's my opinion and it could very well be wrong. Maybe we will know the answer before we die.

[btbc92]

Obedience regardless if you are a child or adult as the Bible says keeps you out of these situations. It really does. I haven't smoked, drank alcohol, etc because of what? Having obedience. No matter what my friends or peers did. I listened to my parents and I stayed out of trouble. Only you know the things you did and got reprimanded for. So I think we should just leave it right there.

[btbc92]

@simonqq No that is true. This is a wicked and evil generation. Sin has grown and people no longer care for Godly things. That is why. They took bible scripture out of school, parents especially here in America are slowly losing their rights. traditional ways always WORKED. It is HOW you apply it that may not. This is why families stook together, people married young and society was a bit more stable. I never said my parent's ways were perfect. I listened to the word of God. My parents always fought to actually do that. God kept me. Which is why I never did things that were wrong. I can just tell by what you are saying about yourself. You dislike structure. And believe in doing whatever you want basically. So that is your thing. That is not for every person. Others just didn't want to listen. Period. Because society programmed children through media, etc not to. I know because I was too. And a lot of cartoons were part of that. Society has taught rebellion. And for starters for the last 40-50 years was actually the baby boomers era. Guess where all the rebellion came from? You guessed it. The Baby Boomers. Like I said. Do your research. Oh, I know the right way and that is God's way. And if you want to walk any other way, expect problems to happen. That's why some families are stable and most today aren't. And probably why we have so many millions of teens and children with mental diseases, depression being the biggest one. Sin nature, which I am sure you don't believe, is just going to get worse. Soon kids won't have to listen to their parents and parents will no longer be parents but birth donors. Are you prepared for that world? It's already coming. They're already doing with the shots saying kids and override their parents for that also.

[JessieBellll]

My goodness you are so influenced and close minded, you assume so much.

[btbc92]

@JessieBellll I ain't influenced, Y'all influenced. Better closed-minded in the ways of not being part of the world and you want to know people like you are still SINGLE and with problems. Because you people do that stuff. I don't play that crap. I find out some guy touched my kid, it's on.

[JessieBellll]

What if it's some old woman?

[btbc92]

@JessieBellll the same thing. She touch my son, her butt is going to wish she never stepped over on my tuff messing with my son and trying to influence him. Male or female, touch either my son or daughter, somebody is going to meet their maker early.

[Davismap]

Typical liberal 🙄

[PoliteSpeaker]

(Neutral Opinion)

In the USA it is LEGAL.
16 is the age of consent in some states. A pedo is a person who likes kids aka pre-puberty.

If she was 19 would you care? I'm not saying you're wrong for thinking this is fucked up (talking to gag users) I'm just saying think about why you are saying what you are saying? Does your belief have any foundation? Does flying a plane into a building make any sense? Lol okay maybe I went too far. When I was 20 I dated a woman who was like twice my age. And wanted to date a woman who was like 65 or 70. We would flirt with each other and she'd ask me if she was too old for her hairstyle etc. But we never did anything because the world says it is wrong... But it felt right to me. I, for some odd reason, found her beautiful. Not sure why. Once you get past the illusion of age you realize that these older people are no different. A lot of the time they aren't even wiser, they have a bigger awareness but they are not wiser a lot of the time.

[GoodGuyBreakingBad]

My late Mother was my cousin's legal guardian went the cousin was age 14
at this age, my mother got her on birth control with the Depo shot so she
wouldn't get pregnant, she was having sex cause she caught an STD too
so Lord only knows who she was dating but I believe my cousin should
of been given a long talk on the Bird's and Bees when reaching age 16
no matter what you tell them and you can report it to the police but
the police might tell you we can't arrest a guy whose not having sex
with your daughter but it's hard to say also you could report it and
say you believe the guy is a danger to your daughter now If I had a
16-year-old daughter, I would get her into Counseling and tell the
Counseling she's dating a man old enough to be her father trust
me I'm not here to bash you or your husband or your daughter
there is something you need to figure out and these people on
this site should not be bashing you

[GoodGuyBreakingBad]

Thanks For Most Helpful Guy :)

[Davismap]

Wrong Wrong fake news 🤥

[CaliSixx]

As a 15 year old. I have daddy issues and have always been after older men, but I think 40 is pushing it a little. Don't get me wrong. I find some old dudes REALLY attractive. Like Sebastian Bierk. But I'd never actually do it. It'd be different if he was like 20 or something.

[JessieBellll]

It depends on the girl

[Davismap]

Why not most men love young girls it only nurtal

[meetkitty123]

No under no circumstance it is it normal and I can guarantee you it's not an equal relationship the man who's older has all the control she may not see it that way but it is true you need to go to your local law enforcement and see if there's anything you can do about it I would also contact a lawyer

[livin_hi_808]

Normal, not in this century. At least not in my country which is the great state of North America (not damn Canada)!

Nah, can't dip into the youngster snatch here LEGALLY anymore. You can't even legally sleep with or date your cousin anymore! Which is simply nonsense. She was on the pill smh. So yeah too many damn laws here. Mandates and shit

[Skarletjonancy]

Stfu you child predator off to the crusfixtion with you

[PoliteSpeaker]

@Skarletjonancy In the USA it is legal. 16 is the age of consent in some states. A pedo is a person who likes kids aka pre-puberty. If she was 19 would you care? I'm not saying you're wrong I'm just saying think about why you are saying what you are saying? Does your belief have any foundation? Does flying a plane into a building make any sense? Lol okay maybe I went too far.

[JessieBellll]

@PoliteSpeaker she has issues ignore her

[livin_hi_808]

@JessieBellll yeah I see. She's freaking bonkers AF lol

[livin_hi_808]

@PoliteSpeaker here in Hawaii, its legal to sleep with a 16 year old up to the age of 21 WITH parents' consent or some shit
But legal or not, at the age 40, what the hell would you wanna sleep with, date or especially marry a 16 year old unless, in my head, you had some sick control and child bride fantasy. There's so many people in the world, the internet connects us all so I believe there could be someone out there for everyone possibly if you search

[jim009]

Are you nuts? Love knows no bounds, except when its more like child abuse... but it's ok you don't know what to do and asking for help as a parent is healthy. I would suggest calling an anonymous helpline and get some strategies to address this. Do not give them identitying info, they have a duty to report.

[PeacefulSoul4Life]

First off, I wouldn't advise anyone to break certain laws; especially males who will normally get punished more severely.

What age does a female become a woman? This may be somewhat controversial, however when she can naturally create children-- that should say a lot.

We can debate about morals, society and the norm; but tomorrow isn't promised. The older could possibly outlive the younger.

Not everyone has a perverted view about love & friendship. Many people will respond negatively to this subject because of all the chaotic examples in this world.

In closing, just because it didn't happen to you personally; doesn't mean it can't happen for another. Some people have developed legitimate friendships despite their age gap. Time is an illusion really. To be fair, all the child abuse in this world makes the concerns legit. Peace and Love!

[Kaneki05]

16 and 40 would be fine here. Depends on legal age of said country.

Always though i think no matter legal age such big differences may need a bit more insight to see if one person isn't been taken advantage of but it's normal. This would take actually knowing the people involved and judging it for thy self.

[enbyofenvy]

No its not. Depending on age of consent in your country, id sit down with her, express concern and try to nonchalantly ask questions like his name or where he lives or where they meetup if she Dosnt know. Then relay the information to local police. he's taling advantage of her and is a danger to kids in the community.

[Flower7]

Sorry to hear that you're going through this. It's a horrible situation to be in. You would have to somehow stop them from seeing each other but I know that can be difficult because you can't be with her 24/7 and there's also the issue of teenagers sneaking out behind their parents' backs. Does your husband know? I feel like he would be able to help you out with this.

[Anonymous]

Is that even legal in your country?

Everybody up and down are going to call this guy a pedo and that’s most likely justified. However in some cultures older men do date, marry and support much younger women. Not saying that’s right or wrong but it is something that does happen in some societies.

Im 40 and I know I couldn’t live with myself if I did something like this. Even if my culture said it was okay and no one judged me I still would have a very deep feeling of shame.

Anyway check your local age of consent laws. If this is illegal tell them to stop it immediately or you will report it to the authorities.

[Opinion Owner]

Actually to clarify a pedo is someone attracted to prepubescent children. A sexual predator is attracted to pubescent yet underage teenagers.

Not saying the latter is better than the former. But just to distinguish the difference.

[Mynameisbobby]

You let her date a 40 year old man? Are you crazy? I'll tell you what to think, this man is a pedophile!! He should be in prison honestly. How can you ask this question so casually? I don't get it!! Get her away from him now!!

[PoliteSpeaker]

Maybe but the age of consent is 16 in some states. So it isn't illegal. It's your paradigm that makes you feel that it is. But if she was 18 you probably would care as much. Also I think a pedo is someone attracted to kids aka before puberty. Doesn't mean you're wrong though.

[silkjames]

WHAAT i have a daughter she 13 she a smart girl and she beats dudes up I got her in boxing lol and if a 40 year old puts his critter fingers on my daughter 40 year old he not making it to 41 he 40 for life thats insane talk to your child some kids know no better your the parents handle it there no huddle on this play go find that critter

[JessieBellll]

You sound biased and that's horrible way to raise a girl

[es20490446e]

It STRONGLY depends on the case.

I know a situation like this, and now they have been happily married for a while. With children.

You need to see this guy, and get the fact to judge.

The age difference is big, yet she's a fully developed woman and he's not really an old man. So biologically it makes sense.

[Anonymous]

Absolutely not. You as a parent need to step up and not allow this to continue. You don't have to control her but she can't go on thinking that's ok. That's incredibly creepy and it's terrifying how chill you are with this. You don't know what he could be doing to her. Why would a grown man need to date a teenager? He's old enough to be her father and you're just letting this happen?

[Browneye57]

I think they're fucking. PERIOD.
He's got young pussy. She thinks she's fucking dad.

Yep, it's sick. If she were my daughter she wouldn't be doing this - surely not at 16.
I would tell the old pedophile to get the fuck out and never come back. He might run into a few doors on the way out.

[JessieBellll]

He's not old

[Browneye57]

@JessieBellll For a 16yo girl, forty is WAY FUCKING OLD. And you claim to be her MOTHER? And you're not sure? I mean geebus, so goddam clueless.

[JessieBellll]

Oh shut up, I would have loved a 40 yo at 16

[Browneye57]

@JessieBellll You're a failure as a parent. Plain and simple.

[JessieBellll]

Thanks for the compliment

[Browneye57]

@JessieBellll It's NOT a compliment you fucking moron. THIS YOUR 16YO DAUGHTER.

[JessieBellll]

You sound triggered and bitter

[Browneye57]

@JessieBellll - Well no, my children turned much better thank you.
I find your whole approach to child rearing to be loathsome, and you to be dumber than rocks. Good luck.

[JessieBellll]

I bet you are a hypocrite

[Browneye57]

@JessieBellll - I bet you're wrong.

[JessieBellll]

So what if it was a son

[Browneye57]

@JessieBellll If a forty yo woman was coming onto my 16yo son the wife would cap the bitch.
What is it you don't understand about protecting your daughter? This cavalier attitude is just such a giant fail.
A 16yo is a child. They are not in any place to be choosing a sex partner. PERIOD.
Is she on BC? Cuz that will be next - she'll be preggo. So then YOU are going to have to raise the dipshit's crotch-fruit. Or kill it, that seems popular these days. A woman's right and all that.
This is an unmitigated disaster.

I have three grown children, 26, 30, 34. The oldest married up in age, but not 'till she was in her twenties. What you're doing is condoning child sex abuse - PEDOPHILIA. And then you ask if it's normal. NO IT'S NOT FUCKING NORMAL.

[Browneye57]

And ALL of your replies - both blue and pink - answered in the negative, but here you are trying to defend your position. TOTAL FAIL.

[JessieBellll]

Not all answered negative

[Browneye57]

@JessieBellll - And now we know why you don't have a man. SMH

[JessieBellll]

But I do

You are ignorant and assuming

[Browneye57]

@JessieBellll - Liar. And a loser. Good luck, have fun on GAG. We're done here.

[Ghostlock]

I think it is time for that bastard to go to jail... and to be blunt, he had better be thankful that I am not your daughter's father... I am not so sure that he would not end up buried in the hills of Kentucky somewhere. I would seriously have to struggle within myself not to kill the guy. Good luck, but whatever you do, it must stop... like now.

[btbc92]

Your expression was a bit violent but I perfectly understand you and have more respect for guys like you than so many other men creepy over 20 and 30+. Anybody who downvoted this because you care for your daughter simply doesn't need to be a parent. Nobody should be sending their children out there to the wolves. It means they don't love their child.

[Ghostlock]

@btbc92 Whoever thumbed me down is clearly not a parent. They don't understand the emotions that a father (or mother) can have at the mere thought of somebody hurting your child. But that's okay... I am not worried about being popular anyway. I don't even look at the thumbs up... much less the thumbs down.

[btbc92]

I'm not a parent myself. I never got involved or dated and still a virgin. I don't necessarily think you need to be a parent to know what a parent should actually feel like. That is something innate mostly. I would never have that kind of thing ever happen to my children. And yet I got told I shouldn't be a mother. At least I would know to keep my child safe. I grew up around such people who would do that kind of stuff. A popular opinion is sometimes not the opinion people need to hear. I didn't come here on this site for that also. You spoke right. Any man/woman who finds taking advantage of a young woman or teen needs to double-check themselves. Instead of people having all of these crazy laws, they need to make a bill to make sure that stops at 18 and raise the age and not keep that at 16 while letting those over 18 to take advantage of young people. Anybody 18 and over who choose to go after those men are on their own. They forget these are not the same kind of men from Little Women.

[Yyyyu]

@btbc92 it could be legal in her country anyway would you have protected you're daughter from a 45 year old if she was 18 ? This is still creepy but American law refused to protect young 18 year old or girls in their early 20s

[btbc92]

Yes, I would. I never mess with a man more than 4 years in my senior and I never messed with a man at all. I definitely would have protected her regardless of her age. She is still my daughter at the end of the day. And I would like for her to be with a person who is going to be relatable to her, who's actually going to care about her, somebody she can grow, mature, and learn with, and not some creep who's just looking to see if he can get an easy lay, simply because you just walked into the adult world. So while there are many of young players out there who would try to do the same. There are still plenty of Virgin males out there who also desire marriage and to be with the right kind of woman. Not if she chose to be the kind of woman in the world. Then I can no longer protect her. Whatever happens to her, happens to her. People have choices. And like I told another user, some people are just born for Destruction no matter how much you taught them the right thing to do. I am not saying every man over 30 are all creeps. But there is a fine line between admiring a person's natural beauty versus trying to see if you can get into their pants.

[btbc92]

Like I said before. This is not like the times of Little Women. Back in the 1800 when men still have some standards even if it was legal back then. Some new how to take care of their wives and they did exactly what they promised. Do you think these men actually give a damn these days? No they do not. If they see that God forbid a nine year old is legal for that mess, why do you think they got that same crap going on in the Middle East? What difference does it make? 13 year old was allowed to get married and have sex back then. So the see what have I protected her if she was 18 yes I would have protected her because at the end of the day she is still my daughter. And mama knows a thing or two herself or she wouldn't be vigilant. At eighteen I didn't tolerate that from older men like that either. Once they see you got morals and values they eventually kick rocks and they go the opposite way. Especially if they see your father around, they ain't going to be stupid enough to mess with you if they see they can't try to overpower your own father. They may try that with your mother because she's a woman. But a man will only respect another man. And even then some men would still take chances and still won't respect you. Like some nasty pervert try to do that to me earlier. Tell him me to tell my father to give him a call and then have my father to hand me over to him. Another words. He just threatened to rape me.

[btbc92]

And that was a male user on here. Immediately had him blocked and reported. Dude is only twenty-five, and like I told him before. You don't cross over that line or risk being Six Feet Under. Because my dad wouldn't have played that game. We have our differences, but at least I can stay he wouldn't have tolerated that if another man like that spoke like that about me.

[PikNik77]

Not sure what to think? WHAT IN THE ACTUAL HELL? She’s 16! Be a good parent and end it! I’m guessing there is more behind the poster than this post lets on. Ridiculous…

[ohshee]

Well you must have had her when you were 16 I mean if you're good with it if she is mature enough and responsible enough and her dad's okay with it and she's happy I guess that's all that matters

[Skarletjonancy]

Stfu child predator

[ohshee]

So what name do you want me to call you without even knowing you all I did is answer the question and you're accusing me of being somebody and you know not one thing about me you are the type of person that makes this world fucked up

[es20490446e]

@Skarletjonancy Be calm white cat.

[ohshee]

If you're telling me to be calm that's not going to happen this chick here doesn't even know me and is calling me something and see if she knew me she would see that I was trying to make a fucking point to the mother that the mother had to be 16 years old to when she had her daughter and then I go and say if she's okay with it and her dad is okay with it then nothing else matters yes it fucking matters she's 16 years old her brain isn't even developed just like the mothers wasn't when she had her baby

[es20490446e]

I was referring to the girl.

Don't forget punctuation.

[ohshee]

Lol so was I

[ohshee]

It's almost sounds like a fake question as it was probably her that wrote it no parent in their right mind is going to let their kids go out of 40 year old and only have that to say about it

[Anonymous]

Seriously? If I was dating a 40 year old man my dad would have killed this guy by now! You Seriously don't know what too think? Why aren't you protecting your daughter? I Seriously can't believe that someone would ask this question!

[JessieBellll]

Your dad is a hypocrite

[Opinion Owner]

@JessieBellll Why you say that for?

[JessieBellll]

Because he wouldn't care if it was his son

[Opinion Owner]

@JessieBellll Yes he would care and so would I. I have a younger brother and if anyone a woman was too do anything to him we'd both be so mad!!

[Phoenix98]

Not only is that pretty sick but it’s illegal in most places.

Dude is probably a pedo more then likely. You’d have to be to think it’s ok to be with an underaged girl especially when your more then twice her age.

[legalboxers]

all I gotta say is this...

[Inexpensivefurniture]

She's not "seeing" him, a creepy old predator has set his sights on her. Report him! Don't let her go out with him!

[BillyBalls]

If the age of consent is 16 there is nothing to report.

The crazy thing is if the old geezer gave her alcohol he would be guilty of a crime.

[readyplayer001]

if this is true, he is 40? has nothing in common with a 16 year old basically using her like a mattress, what should you do? act like parent

[slatyb]

It’s not, and it’s not normal for a 40-year-old man to want to date a 16-year-old. It’s Olmsted certain this guy is bad news. Find out. Just say yo want to meet him.

[Cherry234]

Oh hell no that's not normal. Your daughter is a minor. She shouldn't be dating an adult. Don't let her see him and tell her to date someone her age

[Cherry234]

It's illegal and something that you should NOT allow

[ZDoes]

Oddly enough 100 years or so ago this would be considered a good arrangement. Established gentleman, probably owns property etc etc.
Now, call the cops. She's 16. He's 40.

[exitseven]

This is not normal. Either call the cops on this perv or your husband should pay this guy a visit.

[Anonymous]

You know what it won't be normal even if she was 18 and 20 guy's who like women who are young enough to be their daughter are weird. Most women in age gap relationship later regret about being into one this why divorce rate is higher in age gap relationship also abusive relationship. They trick them into being with them

[Anonymous]

What happened to your husband’s balls?

My daughter would not be dating a 40 year old, because if she did bad things would happen to him.

[FunkyMonkee]

You and your hubby had a daughter when you were both 4?

[Yyyyu]

Teenager mother exist maybe she was 14 when she had her

[FunkyMonkee]

@Yyyyu Yeah, I know they do but she said the guy is older than both she and her hubby. So. if he's 40 and older than the both of them and their daughter is 16, that only leaves 4 years!

[Yyyyu]

Maybe both her and husband were teen parents and that mean that they're both in their 30s

[Yyyyu]

14 year old +16 = mother is 30 year old now

[TrgZila]

@Yyyyu 22 at most

[FunkyMonkee]

@Yyyyu Then, that would make the guy in his 60's.

[TrgZila]

lol srsly? She is saying the guy is older than both of them, not their ages combined

[FunkyMonkee]

@TrgZila Then, she should've said he's older that each of us.

[TrgZila]

yeah, but she didn't write a computer program. She wrote it for human.

[CoolGuy7532]

The age of consent is 16 where I live. However, I don't think it's normal for a 40-year-old guy to be dating her. There's too much of an age gap.

[Micky26]

It's not normal... How did she even meet him?
Anyways, you should try to stop it.

[PrettyIsTurquoise]

The ones saying there's nothing wrong with it so long as she's happy and uses protection... what the hell is wrong with you people?

[JessieBellll]

What's wrong with it?

It's just sex, if it was a a boy you wouldn't care so it's stupid

[Cnlngler]

Call the police on this guy.. I think that as parents you should know.. At least run this guy, that's a pedophile.. Maybe he has been with even younger.. Maybe he has a record...

[Daniela1982]

Are you and the guy, who asked if it was weird for a 16 year old girl to date a 46 year old man, in cahoots? Or maybe the same person?

[dustybiker]

I’m highly suspect this is a legitimate account asking the question. Any responsible parental unit would find problems with this scenario. Obviously.

[JessieBellll]

I am going to say as long as its just sex, let them do it. Older men are much better than guys her age. Just put her on pills. Assuming it's legal.

If they are in a relationship it needs to stop. They are way too different.

[TheLittleInnocent]

That's really not normal. You seem more chill about this than you should be.

[Cryptoanonne]

No its not normal and its extremely easy to be abusive relationship. Save her or you'll regret it

[t-8900]

Is she fucking the English teacher or something? damn

[worldscolide]

Thats both illegal and disgusting. Please report it to the police.

[PoliteSpeaker]

Well the age of consent in some states is 16. So if this is in the USA and in one of those states... It's legal. And Maybe that is why this question is so casual.

[worldscolide]

You really need to read your statutes.. There are 2 states where that is legal, and only of the male is under the age of 24.

[Fireguy17]

I'm going to say that is not right what so ever.
What would they have in common?
No, you could probably have him arrested.

[StormyWinter]

No, 40 year old men do not need to be dying 16 year old girls, that's just wrong..

[BillyBalls]

If she is old enough to be fucking a 40 year old she is old enough not to be living in your house.

Plus, other than sex, what is the old geezer doing with a 16 year old?

[JessieBellll]

He's not old

[Dchrls78104]

When I was 40 the last thing I wanted in my life would be a 16 year old girl; it would be next to impossible to imagine that she and I could have anything in common.

[FakeName123]

You and your husband or you and her father that happens to be your husband?

[litty]

That's a potential lawsuit for statutory rape. Some creeps just love underage children, but he better leave her alone if knows what's good for him

[Subarugirl]

I think you should contact the authorities… wtf are you doing as a parent?

[genericname85]

it's very normal for a 16 year old to fancy a 40 year old. but them actually dating is not normal.

[rcljr]

Not much you can do unless the age of consent in your jurisdiction is 17-18.

[enbyofenvy]

Thats the hard part. Depending on age of consent where she is, if its 16 or lower, as a parent the only thing that can be done is have a chat about it with the daughter and then just be there for emotional suppirt when she realizes she's been taken advantage of and simply used for sex by a pedo

[cloud9vortex1234]

No, it's not. You seriously don't know the answer to this?

[Youdumbeotch]

Better think of something considering you’re their parent

[Aiko_E_Lara]

It's hard to believe you're in your 30s asking this question

[VImhh]

Nothing wrong with it I would just check the guy is wearing a condom when banging her

[Skarletjonancy]

Stfu child predator

[CuriousMufuxka]

That is fucked. Either you're bullshitting or.. yeah you are a shitty parent.

[ChiTown33]

I've heard of daddy I sues. But "grandpa issues" is a new one to me lol.

[Scotte1us]

Its not by law, she had to be 18 and over, or you can go to jail too letting this happen, if fbi reads this they can come after you , you are stupid.

[Tania16]

She is in adolescence age so you need to teach her about it because older man May be seduce her

[FreeOhSeven]

No not even a little bit, what on earth could you have in common?

[InferiorElegy]

Yea sure she is, and you the parents aren't doing shit about it? Ok.

[Jmmmfi4]

Are you stupid? You're a grown adult who needs to ask if this wrong? Yes its very fucking wrong.