What is your weakness in a relationship?

Question

InventorofWarp · Accepted Answer

I have no idea.
But I hope to discover it and eliminate it and then improve.
Ideally without losing said relationship.

I do have my suspicions as to what would hamper me in my hypothetical future relationship:
1: Clingness. I've never really been with anyone and, while I'm perfectly happy and capable of functioning in my own company (and my doggies'), I am not a particular loner-type by nature and actually prefer to be around and learn as much as possible about the object of my affections as I possibly can. This might put her off and I fear if my physical desire to spend as much time together as possible and be as near as possible doesn't put her off, then my highly invasive questions, such as sexual history or preferences etc., would, despite being born not out of any insecurities but just out of a genuine curiosity and desire to learn.
2: Conversely, I recognize that I can be somewhat hard to read or get close to at times and I'm not a particularly overly affectionate man. I don't know if this will change when I'm in close proximity to someone for an extended period, I am quite physically affectionate with my doggies, I need something to spoon and cuddle and keep warm with at night. But, as it stands I'm not completely okay with physical touch and I'm not sure what'd end up being like.
3: Naivety. I'm not exactly the most experienced or well-versed man in anything regarding relationships or sex. And a lot of what I "know" comes from either one of two sources: Romance novels/films or porn. I had next to no positive role models in terms of relationships growing up, both my parents are twice separated ontop of being divorced from each other and that probably should've happened like 15 years before it actually did. Still, I consider myself amongst the most hopeless of romantics, waiting for the right girl. And she'd have to take a lot of patience and tact with me while I tried to navigate it as best I can and figure things out and learn and understand things. To my credit, I'm pretty aware that it'd almost certainly make more sense to defer to her opinion if I ever find a "her" to defer to.

Guanfei · Accepted Answer

If I love, I love way too hard, and that's usually used against me.

jennifer_bloom · Accepted Answer

I love to take care of people who are vulnerable but I think sometimes I go over board, like I once got yelled by a personal support worker for holding the door for a disabled person cause their care giver thought I was denying them the confidence and dignity of opening the door for themselves instead of relying on me to do it.

Agape93 · Accepted Answer

My temper

Lliam · Answer

My weakness is my temper. I occasionally have loud outbursts. Most commonly it's when an inanimate object like a computer or printer is being uncooperative. But I occasionally do it to my wife. It's not anger. It's almost always frustration.

I've gotten really good at catching myself when that happens. It's also nice that my wife has learned to understand me and know that I love and respect her above all else.

She can act more like Alice Kramden on The Honeymooners who would stand there with her arms folded, tapping her foot and rolling her eyes, waiting for Ralph to get done ranting, pacing and waiving his arms. Not that I rant, pace or wave my arms. Mine are more like mini eruptions like "What the fucking fuck!" But my point is, she doesn't feel hurt or threatened.

Medicalbug · Answer

I tend to be too optimistic and assume my partner is equally invested and capable. I give people the benefit of a doubt and have this “live and let live”attitude that prevents critical analysis on my part. For example, I had this guy who systematically shirked every responsibility just because I was capable of handling it. This began to extend to simple things that he could have done with ease and started to feel like having a grown up child instead of a partner. I was also noticed that I was the only one listening to problems and providing consolation. I have to say - I think I’m too easy going and attract people who like taking advantage of my “nice” nature and willingness to confront and handle things.
As a result, relationships tend to disappoint me and I develop a strong urge to be single. Sometimes I honestly don’t know if I want to bother with relationships at all because apparently I have bad judgment. Right now I’m just kind of done with them.

spuitkaas · Answer

I think I'm disorganized attached, means I both have fear of intimacy, but also fear of abandonment. It's a great toxic mix, because I need a lot of conformation from the other person, but if he shows a little less, I deattach mentally directly. I'm very aware of it though and trying to work on it, communicate very clearly and check in with friends a lot to relieve burden, however, I haven't been with a guy that long in years that could really help me feel secure enough to heal.
Other than that, I have ADHD and sometimes I blurt out stupid things impulsively and I will forget every important event ever. My ex took me forgetting events very personally (I wasn't diagnosed yet), so that made me very insecure.

ARWINGx1 · Answer

I haven't been in a Relationship before, but two things that I've been told... which in turn, can confirm being potential issues:

Unemotional (as in, I'm guessing that I can appear as if I have a tendency to not care about anything. Or: (make it appear as if) in secret, it was a mistake to enter a relationship in the first place)
Selfishness (typically in the form of "take/"accept" more than what I'd reciprocate/give in return")

As for those that I DO worry about:
Inconsistent affection.
(at least in bed) "Mildly crazy" (I mean, Whatever position and/or idea I could come up with)

At least these are what I could "remember" at the moment.

Novacane · Answer

My weakness is that I would do everything for them. I am a very independent person but when in a relationship I am very loving and love to show that person how much I love them, I would put them above everything. It's a weakness because I know women would not do that for me in return.

TheBootyChest · Answer

My weakness in my last relationship was (apparently) not seeing her for who she was. Not in a bad way, but I guess I was so fixated on trying to let her know who I was, and how I handle things in my life, that I didn't do the same for her. I thought I was communicating well with her, and being a good boyfriend, but this was my first time in a serious, and adulting relationship.

Dubadu4ever · Answer

Don't know. Never been in a relationship since birth. But if I were to consider my friends and family, I guess... I don't know. I don't see any negative things of me. I always try my best to be a good bestfriend and daughter for my family and friends.

Lyndsielee666 · Answer

Definitely my “I can fix him” mentality when I, in fact can not fix him 🥴

laurieluvsit · Answer

Falling in love and then having my heart ripped out!

Jamie05rhs · Answer

I don't trust anyone. I am willing to go out on a limb and give you a chance, but if you let me down then I will turn off to you completely.

Ironically, actions do not mean much to me. I need to hear words in order to believe someone. Because people know that they will be accountable for their words; so flaky people are less likely to speak them.

ChrisMaster69 · Answer

Emotional vulnerability. i am very open when in a relationship and that adds a level of vulnerability lol.

petitedollbabee · Answer

I put my partners needs before my own, they come first. If they need something that I have, i instantly give it to them. My main focus is helping them feel good and be happy, I would do anything within my ability for my partner.

Sasha_Gee · Answer

If a guy says he likes me while I see something in me that I want to fix, I have trouble believing him. And missing him when he's gone. I know how annoying clingy people will be so I don't spam his inbox, I just try to be patient.

Lucy68 · Answer

I'm too loving (like I'm the chick that likes to spoil them with gifts, compliments, etc.) but I also have trust issues

Jasmine-Darkfire · Answer

Not having enough time to give him, feeling bad that I'm too busy with life and school for any real time together. Hence why I'm single for now.

Buffy_Gee · Answer

My personal weakness will be having to tolerate a lazy partner. I like people who can get their own business done with little or no help at all from their partners. I mean Id be happy to help whenever, just don't make yourself seem like dead weight because I'll leave.

mangoandmartini · Answer

Irrational - I live on the edge, tomorrow is not garanteed, my husband loves me but hates this about me as I do things on impulse and sometimes the repercussions are not always the best lol.

BCA6010 · Answer

Thinking I could've done more or something differently for a better outcome, or sometimes being overly accommodating and letting myself get taken advantage of.

Kittycurious · Answer

I lose trust easily. But maybe I shouldn't trust at all and allow the person to earn it first. I don't know which way is best

Anonymous · Answer

I'm too passive. I keep things bottled up when something they do bothers me and don't say it, and then they end up pointing out problems in my personality and action straightforward and I get overwhelmed and cannot do the same.

blueflameleo · Answer

I can’t keep a girlfriend I’ve always had one nights or dated strippers my life has just been one big party now I’m 45 and feel completely lost I don’t even know how to talk to a girl the right way now

AdithyaR · Answer

Mine seems to be a self destructive cycle where I'm too scared of rejection to approach someone but too insecure about my looks that I don't believe someone when they approach me.

ZDoes · Answer

I slide into the "we" zone comfortably and , I've been told, a little too quickly for some.

Minerate · Answer

Never been in one, so honestly have no idea... and that somewhat scares me if I ever manage to get one.

muscularbumblebee · Answer

I put too much effort in when the other person clearly no longer cares. Every time

JSmuve · Answer

Putting her needs ahead of mine. It's seldom appreciated so I've learned to make a better effort putting myself first.

libsaretards · Answer

Feeling like damaged goods or putting her on a pedestal. These are the main issues I run into. I've gotten better but those issues are still there.

Wester1967 · Answer

Always attracting Narcissistic women. There are not a whole lot of them, but the ones who are there have already found me multiple times

AncientWisdom · Answer

I’m easy just give me a big smile and some twinkling bedroom eyes. It will be on.

Gwenhwyfar · Answer

Loving the other person too much

MCheetah · Answer

Big booty bitches? I dunno. If I ever get one, I'll fill you in on the deets.

user1516 · Answer

Behavioral:  Inability to open up.  Something they do:  Their smile and the way they look at me.

Citizenkirk · Answer

I can't tell a lie, father, I cut her cherry tree down.

FelicityChi · Answer

When he tells me he likes me, I have a hard time believing he actually does.

awkward_author · Answer

I have a tendency to be oblivious to a lot of things unless the other person is direct with me about it.

GoodGuyBreakingBad · Answer

Lack of Communication and feel like nothing exists between us two

MM1480 · Answer

Unable to judge correctly, i take guys at face value.

Juxtapose · Answer

I keep attracting people that are bad for me because I tolerate too much toxic behavior and try to assume the best in people.

TonyMetal___86 · Answer

I don't have any weakness but being affraid of divorce might be considered one because i don't believe in divorcing except for cheating

ChiTown33 · Answer

Women I like, don't like me. Women that like me, I don't like.

grega239 · Answer

I was too trusting, i ignored myself, i was going out of my way too much and i didn't demand reciprocation

Anonymous · Answer

i try hard not to let the other person know they hurt me because i dont want them to know how much power they have over me.

motownplayer2000 · Answer

A woman that’s playful and doesn’t care how she looks to others but me

SenseiSeptred · Answer

My love is quite consuming to the point that I don't return well in one piece.

Anonymous · Answer

Dominant females. when they use sex to control me, like chastity, and seduction, i can't say no to them ever, about anything.

dragoblack · Answer

Laying my head on her lap and relaxing while she plays with my hair

Hulk30 · Answer

based on virgo men's nature mine is definitely insecurity

xJayleenx · Answer

I have doubts all the time and im too much of an overthinker

Twalli · Answer

I have autism, so I miss a lot of signals that normal people don't.

McKellar · Answer

Sometimes lacking the communication. Sometimes,... not always.

msc545 · Answer

I don't put up with childish behavior and most women do that.

dolemite89 · Answer

a big ass, i can’t think straight when they’re around

ashool · Answer

Bidding me important matters or emotions those may lead to separation in sudden

Leo_senga · Answer

Staying unstable when she is not around, thinking that other guys are penetrating her🤔🤔🤔

Anonymous · Answer

Blowjobs. While I am in her mouth, I am temporarily under her complete control.

Jemini_Crocket · Answer

If he's emotional. I automatically feel bad.

howhigh420 · Answer

Forgiving the evil guys to much love to quick

w0810lv · Answer

Sex iove sex and I'm into a lot of sexual stuff

Alyssa_11 · Answer

Trust. I can’t trust easily.

SAMI_DABBAB · Answer

I let disrespect slide

What is your weakness in a relationship?

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