Help my dad doesn’t want me to get married and move out until I graduate college and he wants to talk to my boyfriend?

Question

I told him that I’m working so hard to save up to move out and get married to my boyfriend in a year and a year and a half and he told me that I can’t until I graduate college and that he was going to speak to him this isn’t fair because I feel like my parents already chose my whole life for me and my only dream is to get married to my boyfriend and move in with him I also told him that I would continue college. I am really heart broken right now I started crying and completely freaked out when my dad told me that he was going to talk to him I even yelled at him and called him a jerk he was trying to increase the volume on the radio while I was crying. Shouldn’t I be able to choose my own path? It’ll be 3 years of us together next year im really heart broken.

Miristheiss · Accepted Answer

You can take their advice under consideration but you are of legal age... if you and your fiance want to marry, as long as you both move out of your parental homes and move into a place together as husband and wife there is nothing they can do.

Marry if you want. It says you are 20. I'd guess you might be 21 by the time you marry.
That is totally fine and normal. It is not like you are 15. You are an adult. 20 and 21 year old women have been marrying since the dawn of time.

It is only recently society mandates you must go to college, go to graduate school, get the perfect job lined up... get a year in with the company, save 20,000 dollars... then you can marry by the age of 30.

If career is truly your main purpose in life and your main motivation/priority in life and you live to work instead of working to live then you may want to wait but there is nothing wrong with going to college while you are married. People do it all the time.

TallAnon · Accepted Answer

Lol, I would also tell you to chill and think about that for a good while longer. Moving out is fine, getting married is jumping the shotgun quite a bit. Perhaps think that one over for a bit, maybe live on your own for a while, then together and see what that's like.

weysally · Accepted Answer

its your life, do what you feel is right, but remember this, you make your bed you have to sleep in it

Gwenhwyfar · Accepted Answer

It’s your choice not your parents’ but make sure you guys are able to support yourselves

varan69 · Answer

Listen to your parents, its not like if in a week is the weeding. With all respect u did a tantrum to ur dad when there is nothing done or set yet. So let it slide right now they dont agree fine no problem just keep going and either or, ur boyfriend hasn't even proposed to u yet has he so why break your head. So keep up ur school be someone in life or accomplish/get a degree because college is going to stress u even more. Dont rush and enjoy every single day

exitseven · Answer

I really don't know enough to make a good decision. I have kids and I know that if they wanted to get married while they were still in college I would not be to happy about it either. People change a lot between the age of 18-25. They get different ideas about life and can actually become different people. What if you find that when you liked about this guy now will seem rather silly when you are a little bit older? What if you have a child before you graduate and get a career off the ground?

GoodGuyBreakingBad · Answer

No offense but they must believe in arranged marriage due to religious reasons
also if they refuse to allow you to move out, they can be held for false imprisonment you are 20 years old and will be 21 this August, you are old enough to make your own
decisions no offense to your parents they sound like troubled parents who need to realize they got to let you go. So sorry you are up against this and don't do anything foolishly there is hope. (( hugs ))

Anonymous · Answer

Your Dad isn't the one getting married so he doesn't make the choices.

It is clearly his duty to advise so you should listen to and consider his opinion and try to understand why he is saying what he is saying but you must make your own choices as you are the one who must live with the consequences of those choices.

Waldoe · Answer

you are old enough to make your own choices. They are nor in Control you are an Adult... just say "Thank you for your advice, I will keep it in mind when I make a decision, I love you Mom, you're the best" then make your own choices, you are an ADULT... for all of the rest of your life, you will live with these decisions...

dolemite89 · Answer

your only 20 this is one of the few cases u should actually listen to ur parents 😂

888theGreat · Answer

Is he shopping for a Shot gun or has he been cleaning one?

jasco · Answer

Honestly your parents are right on the get married after college park because college is hard. Focus on your studies so that when your ready you can get married without worry

MrtoddsWildRide · Answer

Consider yourself lucky. My daughter is forbidden from dating until she is married.

Deku2009 · Answer

So does your mom feel exactly the same way , as your dad. What your boyfriend think V

Andres77 · Answer

You're Latina...

Help my dad doesn’t want me to get married and move out until I graduate college and he wants to talk to my boyfriend?

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My boyfriend doesn't want to meet my dad?

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