Why the Inability to develop lasting connection?

[Anonymous]

I don't necessarily mean romantic relationships, it even applies to friendships. I can't really let people in cause I don't really find the ones around commonsensical enough most of the times and the ones I admire or appreciate are mostly quiet. Since I'm not a great talker either and since they might find me a wee below their league, I have trouble approaching them. How to develop lasting connections?

[caring__1]

If you feel more comfortable around quiet people and want to connect with them, ask them for help. Quiet people often appreciate being asked to help, as it shows them they have something of value to offer that is appreciated by others. Just make sure you're not just assigning them busy work you expect them to do alone, which would just leave them feeling used.

You can also comment on your observations, but stay away from commenting on physical appearance. People are more accepting of appreciation shown in areas they have control (their own choices and actions) rather than genetics that are out of their control. You can open doors with statements like "I was impressed with the answer you gave the teacher. It helped me to see it from a totally new perspective. Thank you."

[Asker]

Very useful, will do!

[caring__1]

Glad to help.

[Nidal_AA]

1st thing is this league thing is shit... Approach everyone normally... If someone is on a "higher league" then one of the things they should be able to do is to respect everyone and not to even think highly of themself..
...
2nd thing is maybe you need to lower your standerds if you can't find someone real...
...
3rd thing is its okay for a quiet person to be friends with talkative people... Im not real talkative myself but i get along with talkative guys by just filling up my convos with obvious sentence... (eg the weather used to be good in the morning but now its not) deep inside me idc about the weather and i think this sentence is useless but thats what most talkative people do (say obvious things) which is okay

[Nidal_AA]

Lots of words sorry lol

[Asker]

Thanks for the answer!

[Nidal_AA]

Your welcome 👏