How do I stop judging people for drinking?

[Anonymous]

So I don't drink alcohol, I never have, simply because I've found that nothing good comes from it. My boyfriend does drink, and I find myself becomming more and more judgy and "controlling" about it. More often than not, when he is going to events with drinking involved, I ask if he is planning on drinking a lot. It doesn't bother me with other people, but for some reason, I don't like the thought of my boyfriend running around drunk at some party somewhere without me being there. I trust him, it's not that, and he definitely isn't an overuser, but it still bothers me, and it's clearly my issue, so I really don't want to bring it up with him.

So does anyone have any advice on how to be a little less strait-laced? I guess

[Kaneki05]

Well you almost fall into one of those stereotypical undrinking judging people key word almost since you are not lucky. Been self aware and understanding that's more on you is great in the sense it will help you forward and not be one of those people.
Like many things they can only approve if one admits it, that's the first step.

Therapy would be best but if you can't that's fine since therapy is a lot of usually talking to someone and quite a lot of it is just talking it through at yourself. While thinking and taking steps to fix the problem.
So if you keep working at it and just find someone you can voice such issues to I am sure it will become less of a worry.

[Ironic_Method]

I'm guessing it's because you've heard one too many stories about infidelity or doing something stupid with the "I was drunk" excuse.

I'm kind of in the same boat and expressed my concern to my partner early on about my disdain for drinking. She worked with and proved that she was responsible to ease my fears and it hasn't been an issue for years. Though she does drink less now since she realized she doesn't care too much for it.

[jahaims]

What about it bothers you?

[Asker]

I have control issues I believe, when something in my life isn't under control I panic, and I try to have it my way. I know that's an issue, and that I have to fix myself, but I dont know how.

[jahaims]

I'd recommend therapy

[Asker]

I I would too 😂 just can't afford that

[Asker]

(Just one "I")*

[jahaims]

Bummer. You can read up on it and try to work it out yourself. The control issues stems from something. At least you are self aware enough to identify the problem.

[Asker]

Oh I am very aware where the issues stem from but that cannot be fixed sadly.