I'm not sure what to do?

[Coyote12]

I matched with a girl on a dating app a little over a year ago. We got along great but she decided to just be friends. Then sometime after she got a boyfriend. Then recently she got a new job and was wondering if I could help her with it (she interviews me about finances). She invited me to go eat after the interview, then she invited me a 2nd time for coffee and return some papers to her. But just before the 2nd time her boyfriend asked her to ask me if she was single, would I go for her? I told her no I wouldn't, but I would (I said no because I didn't want to make things awkward). The guy sounds like he is threatened and I don't want to cause any trouble.

⛔NOW THE QUESTION⛔ Should I tell her how I feel and give them space? Or should I just leave things alone? I still have feelings for her but I don't want to ruin the friendship. Thanks for reading.

[Avicenna]

No, since she is not single, you should not give her the idea that you would date her if she were single- that is not fair to them. She'll be single again someday- just keep in touch with her.

[Guy13]

It looks like you are meddling way too much into this. You are breaking a home apart

[Coyote12]

I don't want to break a home apart. She is the one that invited me twice. Should I just disappear? I don't want to cause any trouble.

[Guy13]

Yeah man... I would slowly ghost out as not to cause irrevocable harm. Most would not care so obviously you have a good heart, therefore, it is likely the shame and guilt will take all the fun out of it. I appreciate that you took my comment with some level headiness. That says volumes about you... good things!!

[Coyote12]

Thanks man! I do value your opinion. I still wanted to be good friends with her but if it will cause problems then ghosting will be the cost. Also when you say shame and guilt will take the fun out of it. You mean on her side not mine right? Lol

[Guy13]

I think you as well... Once the act is over then boyfriend/husband sensing changes and she starts blaming you etc... Putting distance is the best thing to do.

[marshmallowcream]

No , I’m sorry but there’s no point in sharing your feelings if she’s got a boyfriend

[Coyote12]

So what should I do? Disappear and give them space? I don't want to hang out with her if the guy doesn't like it.

[marshmallowcream]

Well , if she wants to continue your friendship I dnt think it’s fair to have to end it because of her man , unless she herself decides she doesn’t want to carry on speaking to you. However , if being friends with her is difficult for you due to having feelings and you feel conflicted then maybe it’s better to distance yourself

[Coyote12]

So my plan was to tell the truth about my feelings to her (and hopefully won't ruin the friendship?) then just disappear. Again I want to do what's right and not cause problems. But I hate to ruin a friendship like this.