Should I Remain Friends with her after she rejected me and after sometime got into relationship with someone else?

[Anonymous]

There's a girl in my college i found attractive i like her and after talking for 3 months and becoming good friends i confessed to her but she denied saying she just wanted us to be friend after that i tried to cut off my contact but she didn't stopped calling or texting and insisted to be friends so i stayed her friend as she didn't had any other friend i stayed her friend and after some time she got into a relationship with a quiet guy in our class and earlier after my rejection i asked her is it because she have crush on some other guy but she denied but after getting into relationship with him she told me that she had crush on him even before we become friend and now i feel so bad as she made a new female friend too who support her and her new boyfriend. i feel like i am of no use of her now. now she's not being so friendly like she used to be earlier and when i ask her if she wants to end our friendship she don't let me end things and blamed i always fight with her and play the victim card. we had a fight few days ago so the next day I ignored her whole day but after class when i was going back with her she started to cry and run away i tried to calm her but she said she didn't want to talk and her boyfriend calmed her and later when i called her to check on her she said so many rude things to me i felt bad. and told me she felt bad cuz i said i feel like she was ignoring me and not replying to my texts. so we are in fight and not talking so for last few days she been calling me daily but i am not picking her calls and not replying to her texts. Should I end things with her? or Stay her friend? I still have feelings for her.

Stay her Friend

End things with her

Updates

1 y

I am confused on whether to remain her friend or not because whenever i am sad or unhappy she talks to me. if i tell her I'm sad she lets me call her and talk till i feel fine. that's why I'm kinda confused.

Updates

1 y

Well I ended things with her. it was really hard for me but i cope up with that but now i look back i realized if i stayed for long i was only going to destroy my life and career and staying awar from her was the right thing to do. Now she tries to make up things with me but I now know that's not the train I'm gonna ride again on... thanks for everyone here for helping me out.. love to all

[SueShe]

Your question is difficult to grasp at best because of your lack of punctuation. But, from what I read, it will be more harmful to your own ego to keep this lady as a friend.

You can keep her as an acquaintance but I personally would not be friend with a person that is so unstable and is showing different traits of character.

Try to distance yourself from her. Since she is in a relation (from what I could read), since it will certainly not bring you any positive feelings to keep a friendship with someone that rejected you.

To me, her behavior is odd at best and a red flag. You have feelings for someone that is in a relation and that is no good. What are you expecting by keeping your feelings? Are you hoping she will break up with her boyfriend and chose you instead? That would be a bad choice to make because I am sure that you would not remain in a relationship for a longer period of time with that person, given her lack of emotional stability.

[BlueScorpio]

If you're staying friends in hopes of it being your turn next in line when it comes to dating even though you already been rejected, then yes end things and go your separate ways. You're hoping she will change her mind ir the outcome will change and it won't, you just be wasting time.

[JamesDiaz11]

Law 36, in Robert Green's 48 Laws of Power- Disdain things you cannot have; ignoring them is the best revenge.

Do not let yourself be friendzoned by women- there is nothing to be gained from being friends with women, as a man. Being around her, while she flaunts her new boyfriends, disclosing details of what they can do, and you cannot, is nothing short of torture. Your presence, your attention, and your resources are what she's after- don't let her keep you around, even if it's only to elevate her own self-opinion- i. e. "oh, I'm such a good person/ good friend by keeping him around, coercing him into accepting the crumbs and proclaiming that's all he needs or wants..."

Seriously, leave her be. Once a woman has made up her mind about you there is little changing it, and there's nothing to be gained from sticking around. Block her, no explanation needed.

[oh_k789]

I regret it, but I have to endorse this answer.

[Guy13]

Backing all the way out relinquishing all possibilities of Influence might be the best Friend thing you can do. Maturity in retrospect if/when her relationship breaks up. Your Value will definitely increase.
One can back out almost unnoticed and appreciated by the guy which means by the girl too which means Respected by all…which means in a perfect position to reunite if Time and Circumstance allows.

[DrBanana]

Ok so from what I’m understanding is that you went for the shot and missed?
That’s ok these things do happen. As for staying friends this is an internal question you need to ask yourself I’m afraid king story short if you feel it’s gonna be hard/ painful you might have to take it on the chin and leave the friendship and not force yourself into the social situation.


I’d recommend if you do end it just do it nice and gradually, focus on other stuff and make yourself genuinely busy and just let it naturally fizz out.


Of course personally I’d be classy about it and if she talks to you just be nice and make some small talk here and there and wish her the best.


But as long as you can sleep soundly with the decision that’s the main thing and good luck with what ever choice you make.

[oh_k789]

This is another useful answer. This and the other answer by JamesDiaz say all I could have.

[DrBanana]

Oh that is for that, hope it does help the chap out even if it just gets their brain jogging for ideas.

[Asker]

I am confused on whether to remain her friend or not because whenever i am sad or unhappy she talks to me. if i tell her I'm sad she lets me call her and talk till i feel fine. that's why I'm kinda confused.

[Lkid23]

This is the best response I guess.

[oh_k789]

@Asker

What you tell here seems to mean she would want to be actually friends, does it?
If so... (don't overlook the size of the "if"), a second question is to be faced, squarely: do you genuinely want to be friends with her?
Could you?

[DaisyM23]

I didn't really read this before I clicked end things with her but you've wrote out a big block of words so I can see there are problems here - she doesn't like you, you like her, if you can be just friends and stay happy with that and both of you keep that boundary then stay friends but don't hassle with it if not

[Man-O-Metal]

Geeza-fricking-loo. Good golly 🤦🏻‍♂️🤦🏻‍♂️🤦🏻‍♂️ Bro, it is no longer worth the effort. If she's going to get this hyper-emotional about it then keep ignoring her and let it fizzle out. I know it kinda sounds jerky, but you've got better things to do than spend hours out of your day trying to repair something that could be compared to duct taping a busted radiator line. It'll just keep leaking until the pressure builds up and busts that sucker wide open again.

[CallmeTheKnight]

Dude, she's not your friend. Staying friends with her is more harmful than good. You only did that because you thought there was some hope of the both of you getting together, which is a lie. Stop texting her, stop calling her, just block her because she's full of shit and was never interested in you. Trust me bro, I been there before. Last thing you wanna do is listen to her talk about this guy she supposedly started dating.
Stop playing yourself and move on. There is no friendship.

[MrOracle]

It is not in your best interest to remain friends with a girl you have feelings for who rejected you. Nor is it good for her to believe that she can reject you but still get what she wants from you.

[fembotnpc777]

She has two boyfriends for the price of one? Fuck that ho shit. Me n my girls have no boyfriend. Fuck these hoes with a dude menagerie like--

[boggboss]

If u still have feelings end things clearly u are not capable of just being friends with her

[Jess_D]

Don’t feel obligated to stay friends. Do whatever is best for you.

[In_Trance]

Block her