How do I get over it and heal?

[Anonymous]

I met this guy in club when I was 18 and he was 23. He took my number and asked me out. I just came out of my first relationship and was brokenhearted and so confused. I needed change and thought it would be nice to go out with someone more mature than my first boyfriend, who was the same age as I was, so I agreed to go out with him on a date. He wanted to sleep with me and manipulated me into it, so I slept with him, didn't really knew how dating usually goes. It happened twice. I felt like a shit after. I felt used, like a whore. After first time, I found out he knew my sisters boyfriend, they were friends and neighbors. When we met second time, I told him who I was so he decided we are not doing anything again and I have never heard of him again. I knew I will have to see him at some poin in life and it happened after many years, he came to my sisters house to birthday or some gathering while I was wisiting and acted like we don't know each other which is good because I didn't tell anyone anything because I was ashamed of it. By this day, we saw each other few times, at my sisters house, on parties, gatherings or in passing. Last time we saw each other on a party when my sister and her now husband got their first child. During party he mentioned he and his girlfriend broke up, and that they almost married. One time he joked how everyone on this party was married and he was the only one who is single and doesn't have luck in love and my brother-in-law said he is not only one because I'm also not married. He replied as a joke, and said directly to me that we should try it, like we both don't have luck in love, maybe it would be good for us to sattle down. Everyone laughed. I laughed and didn't say anything but I felt anger. I don't know why. I'm now 26, he is 31. I had many relationships and partners during years, and now I'm in a relationship but I never really forgive myself mistake I made when I was 18 and how stupid I was. How can I take revenge or forgive?

[WaterIsland]

I’m so sorry that happened to you. I wouldn’t take revenge tho. I don’t think revenge will help you heal and feel better, which is why I wouldn’t recommend it. Your goal should be to focus on yourself, heal, and feel better.


What he did was wrong. He clearly isn’t a good guy at all.


The thing to remember tho, is that it truly sounds like you learned from it. It was a horrible experience for you, I’m sure. But you’ve grown from it. I know it’s not the same necessarily, but I think everyone has had experiences in their past that they wish were different. I know I do. We were all young and naive at one point. And none of us can take that back.


Just remember. That moment doesn’t define you. That moment isn’t who you are. You have so much more to offer the world than that. Do your best to stay positive and focus on all the great things about yourself.

[Anonymous]

Live and learn and move on. Moving on gets a lot easier as you grow older.

[Iron_Man]

Never date people from nightclubs

[In_Trance]

just move on.