How can you deal with loneliness and a lack of meaningful relationships?

[RyanEC]

I am kind of a reluctant loner, I don’t have many friendships I consider to be truly meaningful and I don’t have a girlfriend.

Sometimes this gets me down and for some reason I feel this way today.

Updates

+1 y

Anyone else?

[Anonymous]

Feeling lonely and lacking meaningful relationships can be a difficult and isolating experience, but there are strategies you can use to cope and improve your situation.

1. Reach out to others: If you're feeling lonely, it can be helpful to reach out to others and try to build new connections. This could involve joining a club or group that interests you, attending social events, or reaching out to old friends or acquaintances.

2. Practice self-care: Taking care of yourself physically, emotionally, and mentally can help you feel more grounded and resilient in the face of loneliness. This could involve getting regular exercise, eating a healthy diet, practicing meditation or mindfulness, or engaging in activities that bring you joy and fulfillment.

3. Seek professional help: If you're struggling with feelings of loneliness or depression, it may be helpful to seek the support of a mental health professional. A therapist or counselor can help you work through your feelings and develop coping strategies to manage them.

4. Focus on what you can control: While it's natural to long for meaningful relationships and connections, it's important to focus on the things that are within your control. This could involve setting goals for yourself, pursuing hobbies or interests, or volunteering in your community.

5. Be patient and persistent: Building meaningful relationships takes time and effort, so it's important to be patient and persistent in your efforts. Keep putting yourself out there and don't be discouraged by setbacks or rejections.

Remember, you are not alone in feeling lonely or struggling to build meaningful relationships. With time, effort, and support, it is possible to develop the connections and relationships you desire.

[RyanEC]

Thanks for your advice.

[Telekinetic-Potato]

What you're going through is a subconscious decision to ignore the meaning people bring into your life because of a fear you have of getting hurt by people you get close to.

There are many ways we lie to ourselves about this, like putting on a type of tough persona which is really just a version of victim hood.

It's not your fault. Society conditions us that the worst possible thing you can do is try and fail and that if you never try, you can't fail.

This manifests in loners as a perception that the relationships around them are meaningless because they don't go as planned.

Think about the feeling you get when you really want to have sex with someone you know you can't, or the feeling of seeing something really nice at the store or car dealership but it's price places you so frustratingly close, yet so far away.

Now what about that feeling you get when you realize; maybe mid conversation or after, that the relationship is meaningless and doesn't add up to anything. They're pretty similar feelings.

The truth is, there's almost no such thing as a meaningless relationship. Everyone from your family to the guy driving your Uber has some sort of effect or meaning in your life.

It's up to you to find the meaning. Find it by asking yourself what is this person really all about? What brings happiness and meaning to them? What brings them down? What do they come to me for?

When you do this and are willing to adapt your perspective to theirs momentarily, you will unlock a lot of meaning in life. In fact, you'll see it everywhere.

[anon1903]

Perhaps find a new hobby, join a new class, make friends there. Loneliness can make you feel really hollow, so you better act on it fast.

[kylee2437]

You will likely find more genuine people when you are doing things and activities that invite genuine people around

[Anonymous]

Embrace it. You're born alone, you die alone, it really not that big of a deal to be alone in between. Also understand that half the people in relationships today are still alone. They don't care about thier partner or thier partner doesn't care about them, maybe both. Their whole relationship is a fiction to hide from the world how lonely they really are. When you realize this you'll get most people are alone and you'll embrace it as a reality of life.

[shades777]

You can always go on google and see whats going on in your city. There are events and groups, also your an adult do what you want to do, pick up a hobby

[Likes2drive]

I’m in the same boat as you, but I work so many hours it seems to distract me from that until the weekend comes

[Anonymous]

i remind myself it's better to be alone then hurt by anyone