Does caring about someone come before or after the infatuation stage?

[Radiate143]

Is caring a milestone on the path to genuine love vs. infatuation?

[caring__1]

They have as much to do with each other as you deciding whether you want to put on your right shoe first or your left one. You can be infatuated without caring about anyone other than yourself, and you can be caring without being infatuated or desirous. They are completely different and triggered by different parts of your brain. Never make the assumption that one will lead to the other.

[Radiate143]

You actually have proven my point. I think infatuation amd caring are exclusive. Infatuation is very self-centered since it is all about the feelings you get for that person.

Caring is from a place of empathy where you will withhold something you may view as negatively affecting the object of this care.

That's why I think caring comes after Infatuation in a romantic situation.

[caring__1]

Your descriptions of the words are accurate, but they are still unrelated. People who are infatuated don't necessarily start caring, and people who are caring don't necessarily get infatuated. Parents can care about their kids without getting infatuated with them. Guys who are infatuated enough to get into your pants won't necessarily stick around after their needs are met.

[Radiate143]

I disagree with you.

[caring__1]

Are you saying parents will get infatuated with their kids and anyone who gets in your pants will stick around?

[Radiate143]

I didn't specify romantic relationships in the question since I figured it was implied by using infatuation stage.

[caring__1]

You can believe caring always follows infatuation, but I've seen too many people who were disappointed when their assumptions never came true. See things for what they are, not for what they could or should be.

[Radiate143]

I never suggested it was always. I was saying if it progresses there. The question is only about this scenario. Not all the what ifs and generalities. You are bringing in all these cotingencies. It is a specific question.

[caring__1]

Some of the best relationships I've observed started out as friendships. The infatuation didn't truly take hold till the caring was established.

[Radiate143]

So you think caring comes before infatuation. Thank you for your contribution. 😊

[caring__1]

What I believe is they're unrelated. I've seen it go both ways, but, for the most part, caring coming first led to the most stable relationships.

[Radiate143]

How are they unrelated?

[caring__1]

If they are related, there should be a cause and effect relationship. Though lightning might exist when it rains, the rain didn't cause the lightning, and the lightning didn't cause the rain.

[Radiate143]

Ok. Great

[aceleon]

for man: after we get infatuated then proceed to care about it.

for woman: not a woman myself but i guess before even though might change for many.

[Radiate143]

It? Wow.

[aceleon]

mis wording.

[love_conquers_lust]

I think before. It starts with the spark. I think being “in love” catalyzes the path to true love, the commitment.

I never stopped caring about my ex until we broke up. I wanted to spend every minute with her. Not that we did, but the desire was always there. Probably because we DIDN’T spend every minute with one another.

Sometimes caring is a balance of quality time spent together and independently. So it makes the reunion all the more sweeter. Couples do it every day. Love something, let it go. If it comes back, it’s yours to love again, and again…

[ThrillSeeker01]

During and more after.

[Radiate143]

That's fair.

[Anonymous]

Yes that makes sense to me.

[Radiate143]

Cool.

[Radiate143]

But is it before or after infatuation?

[Opinion Owner]

Before.