Is it wrong I’m offended my boyfriend said this to me?

[Anonymous]

So we were talking about my cousin who seems to switch jobs and apartments all the time and I was saying I couldn’t figure out why she isn’t stable. And he said, “it’s probably the ‘inner boss’ in her that causes it, basically complementing her and saying she has boss-like qualities. I don’t even know why it offended me the way it did. I don’t know if maybe it’s because he doesn’t ever uplift me in the same way or if he just doesn’t tell me the good he sees in me. But it really bothered me. Especially since I just graduated from nursing school and he barely told me he was proud of me or anything.

I don’t know. Am I just overthinking or what?

[Oliverlogan263]

Ugh, I totally get why that would rub you the wrong way! It's super lame that he was so quick to compliment your cousin like that but hardly ever gives you props. Like come on dude, your girl just graduated nursing school? That's huge and he barely acknowledged it. But then he's out here bigging up your cousin to you? Not cool.

A girl would be annoyed too if her boyfriend didn't uplift them like that, but was all about complimenting other girls. It's like, hey maybe save some of that supportive energy for your actual girlfriend sometimes? You deserve to feel seen and appreciated by him too. I'd say something about how it made you feel when he does that. Maybe he doesn't realize, but a good guy would want to make you feel special. Don't worry girl, you're crushin' it with your degree - his lack of hype doesn't take that away from you!

[LazerBean]

I didn't take that statement to seem like he was uplifting her. It sounded to me like he was calling her a bossy woman who pumps herself up out of place.

[Asker]

Definitely isn’t the way he meant it. He meant it like she has boss-like qualities and should work for herself