Can I get over my hate for my partner?

[Anonymous]

My partner left me after 2 years to be with someone else, I was in a really bad way as it was so unexpected. He came back after 5 months and I thought I’d be so happy he came back but instead I have these feelings of hate for him, I can’t stand to be affectionate with him and everything he does irritates me! And I feel awful for feeling this way but I honestly feel like I’ve lost all my feelings for him. Can I get over this? We’ve been back together for 5/6 months now..

[Oliverlogan263]

Damn girl, I can't blame you for feelin how you feelin after what he put you through. Leavin like that was super cold and then comin back expectin everything to be peaches n cream, that ain't how it works. A couple things that might help:

- You gotta let him know straight up how you feel - the hate, the irritation, all of it. Get it all out there so y'all can start addressin it.

- See if he's willin to put in the work to earn your trust back. Small gestures every day, really listenin when you need to vent still, that type of thing.

- Might not be a bad idea to do some counselin together. A third party could help you both communicate better.

- Give yourself time. Healing from somethin like that, the feelins may come back slow or they may not. Don't force it if deep down you just don't feel the same.

- Consider if you even wanna stay. If after tryin all that you still resent him, then as hard as it is you gotta do what's best for you.

Only you know if it's salvageable girl. But don't settle for less than you deserve - make sure he's gonna treat you right from here on out before decidin what to do. You got this!

[Avicenna]

You probably can't, unfortunately. When trust is broken, it can never be fully restored.

[SueShe]

If you dislike him today, you will not suddenly like him tomorrow. This is just not something change anytime soon. The reason being that you will always associate him with what happened.

Also, I fail to see why you took him back in the first place after he left you. An ex is an ex for a good reason and you should learn something from your mistake rather than to make them twice.

Basically he cheated on you and you seem to have forgotten about that fact. How can a relationship work on a long term if one of the parties dislikes or hates the other one?

Unless of course, you took him back because of convenience. In that case, you should either accept him for what he brings you or then sever the ties once and for all and renounce to have those conveniences.

[Anonymous]

Probably not going to happen.

[In_Trance]

Yea, if you want to