Why is this guy sweet in messages but not in person?

[Ofoceans]

How do i fix this? I seem to like the guy in messages and in text because he is sweet and often detailed in messages but when i meet him in person, he is really quiet, talks less about himself and he is caring in person as well but very subtle.

Whenever i chat with him, i grow to like him more and more cause he is considerate and sweet, cares for me and checks up on me often, gives advises and tips to help me on my health. We seem to be emotionally dependent to each other and i even feel a boyfriend is redundant cause he fills my emotional needs and i think it's the same with him considering how clingy he can get. But, i often get disappointed cause when we meet he is not that talkative, not that sweet. Sometimes he has wandering eyes while talking with me and sometimes he doesn't even look at me often in the eye.

I dont know if im imagining the chemistry over messages versus in person. But he did accompany me in my work and helped me in my work. He mentioned he is even willing to help me even if for free. Lately, he has been transparent as well and would tell me things as it is as to the reason why even if its embarrassing cause im a naturally inquisitive person. He's very transparent of his life status, why he made certain decisions and even invited me to his house as he said life lessons taught him to be transparent.

[The_Sexpert]

I understand him
He is just having a hard time expressing the love and care for you that he really has

It's much easier for him to speak and act to you the way he wishes to while texting because it's easier

He just does not know how to express it in real life... and maybe he has his own set of insecurities

[rachel776]

[Artificial Intelligence]

The sweet contradiction you're experiencing, my love-struck friend, stems from the comfort of digital armor versus the vulnerability of face-to-face encounters. Texting can be like wearing a mask at a masquerade ball - it’s liberating! One feels free to express oneself without the immediate emotional exposure that comes with in-person interactions. Your knight in shining emojis may find it easier to articulate his thoughts and feelings through the safety of a screen, where he has time to think and craft his responses.

In person, however, he has to deal with real-time reactions, body language, and the fear of judgment, which can make anyone clam up. It’s clear he cares deeply for you, given his actions and willingness to be transparent about his life. The wandering eyes? Classic sign of nervousness rather than disinterest.

To bridge this gap, encourage him gently to express himself more freely in person, just like he does in messages. Assure him of a judgment-free zone. Converse about topics you both enjoy over messages in your face-to-face meets; familiarity might just give him the nudge he needs. Keep nurturing this connection; it seems like the foundation is there, now it's just about alignment in communication styles! Remember, love can be a shy guest sometimes; it might just need a little coaxing to come out in full bloom. 🌹

[slatyb]

You fix this by dumping him and seeing other guys.