How come when you tell someone the truth about themselves they get mad?

Question

blueonblack22 · Accepted Answer

There is a right and wrong way to do this. Here is what qualifies as “tough” love:

It is done privately and never in front of other people.
You provide solid resolutions and advice for the person to follow. For example let’s say someone is really overweight. You just don’t say “you are too fat and you are going to die young”. You say “your eating habits and idle lifestyle are harming you. Really harming you but I can help. I am willing to take you the gym with me.”
You say it in a way where the other person knows you aren’t tying to insult them or be condescending.

If you can’t do any of those things then it can make it even worse. But an exception would be if you know someone is antagonistic and a bully out of insecurity. I’ve met a of insecure bullies in my life. Overweight bullies especially. They can (and should) be called out in public for their crap and their INSECURITY should be called as well.

PizzaDaddyo · Accepted Answer

The truth is bold. Some people can’t handle the truth as good as others. Depending on what the matter is; as the person you’re dealing with varys tremendously. Every person has their own level of honesty too. If you’re the one saying the truth u must be generally honest and value honesty. Being criticized and judged is sensitive to everyone to a degree. So if it’s a harsh truth you must say hopefully they’re one of those type to not react so crazy. Other people will tend to not care about what you think the truth is because it’s “your truth”.

ShellyB · Accepted Answer

If you think “they need to hear the truth about themselves, I am going to tell them the truth about themselves” that probly means you are going to tell them something unpleasant which will probably mean they get upset, and by the way you also might be wrong, it might be something you think is a truth about them but you might not know the entire situation so you may basically falsely accuse them of something which by the way has happened to me thanks to my brother.

DishLady · Accepted Answer

Not mad… but defensive. Like “oh… what made you think that?” But it doesn’t mean you should tell them the truth, even if it stings a little.

Love Doctor Brad · Accepted Answer

Diving into the truth about ourselves can sometimes feel like stepping into a cold shower – shocking and uncomfortable! 🚿 People often respond with anger not because they don't recognize the truth, but because it challenges their self-perception or feels like a personal attack. It's like a dance, really. You step on someone's toes, even if unintentionally, and their first reaction might be to pull away or snap back, not because they don't value honesty, but because, let's face it, truth often comes with a sting. The art lies in delivering the truth with a dose of empathy, like adding a warm melody to the background of a blunt conversation. It turns the moment into a tango rather than a toe-treading disaster. 💃🕺 Love, growth, and understanding can flourish in honesty, when served with a side of kindness and respect.

1

Finchie40 · Answer

Because most people can’t handle the truth and can’t admit to themselves they were wrong , it’s usually someone else’s fault never their own

D_Bone_Steak · Answer

Mad? or disappointed turning into mad? I got to know specifics to put my scientific finger on it... and really finger it.  Fuck our lives right... but we only get to vote for them.

Flatmanlewis · Answer

Well, because if they didn’t ask to hear it then they may not be ready to receive it.

Also, often times, the truth “about people” is subjective and therefore more opinion than fact.

Lastly, many people use the claim of being “bold” or truthful as a disguise for being rude and out of line.

Most of the time people don’t really have a right to an opinion about everybody they know and acceptance can go a lot further than opinions.

mobiusforniner · Answer

Self reflection requires one to change. And change is hard. Most people resist as much as they can. Change usually doesn’t occur until the pain of leaving is less than the pain of staying the same

Stephen Hawkings put it best…. Intelligence is the ability to adapt to change

MrOracle · Answer

Too many people prefer to live in their own delusions and expect others to play along so they don't have to face reality. The delusion is easier and more comfortable, but also more toxic in the long run.

SugarSugarplum · Answer

Do you think people don't know the truth about themselves?  The offense is not that you said the truth, it's when you're cruel about it. That or it's not true at all, it's false and mean.

JacobJordan · Answer

Likely because it isn't true. Very few people are mentally or emotionally stable enough for personal introspection let alone deducing what other people are or are not.

ProbablyClueless · Answer

Ego. People want to feel like they're right. So when they find out that they weren't right, they have to start calling their other decisions into question. And that tends to freak people out.

genericname85 · Answer

Because you are probably confusing "your opinion" with the truth. Also this can be a sign that you don't have the respect of that person to be accepting you critique.

TommyMountainFigure · Answer

Maybe your perception of the truth differs from theirs!

lightbulb27 · Answer

makes them feel vulnerable and bad about themselves. peeps don't like to change.

CrabCakes11 · Answer

Are you “telling them the truth” or are you just being mean?

Jrg98 · Answer

Because sometimes the truth hurts, especially when someone points out a flaw

SotiCoto · Answer

Are the truths you're imparting actually the Lovecraftian kind that induce insanity? That'd be the only explanation I can come up with.

nawtee_me · Answer

Because they wasn’t to believe those things are their own little secrets and no one knows them. When you tell to burst their bubble and the truth is out….

Sharkstealth · Answer

What are you telling them? Are you just flat out rude or are you giving suggestions for remedy?

bobby_bush_eater · Answer

Often times the truth completely skews who you thought someone was... Or selfishly what you wanted them to be

Anonymous · Answer

people these days are so sensitive and wish to be offended

MacDaddyRico · Answer

Because denial is more than just a river in Egypt (de Nile, get it?)

Anonymous · Answer

Because you are presuming that you know them better than they know themselves. Maybe you do, but people don't like to be told that, makes them think you think they're stupid

Loner111 · Answer

Truth hurts, but the way things are said makes all the difference.

stvigor · Answer

Cause it's hard for to change simple with simple tools

whistlingwh0res · Answer

What is the truth anyway? All men are thief and all women are whore period

Samantha36 · Answer

The truth hurts

laly520 · Answer

they can't handle the truth

Alex-Snow · Answer

Sometimes the truth hurts

pethouse · Answer

No one likes to hear their flaws

thisAppIsGarbage · Answer

Because people are weak bitches

Anonymous · Answer

Truth according to whom?

jahaims · Answer

They are immature

How come when you tell someone the truth about themselves they get mad?

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