Should men not get advice from women about relationship issues?

Question

Meaning men discussing their relationship issues with mom, sister, aunt, female friends, etc.

What is a man to do if he doesn’t have many positive male figures in his life to talk about women and relationships with?

hahahmm · Accepted Answer

He's in a really bad situation now because the fact you are even trying to help him means he's basically drowning... just his head above the quicksand and he's flailing for whatever he can grab onto.

The vast majority of women just can't give good advice. Partly, I think that's because men and women think differently and in a way we speak a different language without even knowing it. So she says X, but he hears Y. Even if her advice X was good he won't receive it the same as a woman would. And partly I think it's because women just have a different POV. It's like asking a fish how to be a fisherman. Or asking an expert in painting cars how to build a car engine. Or asking someone who can barely put together IKEA flat pack furniture how to build a house from scratch. Ha ha ha. The reality is that women DO NOT have to do as much as men do... no matter how much feminist scream "equality".

The other thing is that women tend to empathize with the woman she imagines he's dealing with and give advice that favors that woman. It'd be like a guy is going to war to fight the Soviets and he's getting advice from a KGB agent who wants him to get killed.

"What is a man to do"...

There's tons of great truths in the Bible although modern people want to think we are above the wisdom of our ancestors.

In the age of the Internet he can seek out info from guys online -- being careful not to pay attention to guys who just want to simp & kiss women's butts. And giving more weight to guys who have a lot of experience over the guys who are say, in high school or who are afraid of talking to a woman.

I happen to think some of my MyTakes would be useful. I know, very modest of me.

Some Youtube channels I used to listen to a bit -- and me listing them does NOT mean I endorse everything said on those channels but they have a grain of truth in a lot of things. He needs to keep in mind his own GOALS and realize not every guy has the same goals as him so keep that in mind and don't just blindly do what another guy does without thinking about that. Some Channels: Strong Successful Male, Better Bachelor, Coach Greg Adams, Donovan Sharpe, Sandman, Order of Man, Order of Man, Jordan Peterson.

meepmeeperton · Accepted Answer

My opinion is that the way women converse is different from men. They value building social rapport over blunt facts. They will often give advice like “just be nice and clean yourself up”, or downplay how much looks or status can matter in dating. They will tell you a socially acceptable ideal of they want, but rarely tell you anything beyond that. They’ll say “women just want a nice guy” but they themselves prefer a guy who’s playfully rude and challenges them. Or they’ll tell you that height doesn’t matter, but have never dated a man under 6ft tall.

The problem with advice from men is that it can go too far in the other direction. Especially when it’s from single or divorced men, they will view women in a bitter way and give bad advice.

I think men should mostly seek advice from married men, or men in happy long term relationships.

DishLady · Accepted Answer

If it’s someone who doesn’t have a vested interest in the progress of your ongoing relationship (eg a potential crush or date) then she’s ok. Sometimes relatives also need to be kept at arms length when it comes to accepting advice bc they either don’t know the person you’re talking about well enough or they have a vested interest in your being single… Moms are usually the exception, but in some cases it’s a very close sibling or cousin too.

It should be someone who knows you inside out but doesn’t have skin in the game of you’re either being single or in a relationship.

Caroline91 · Accepted Answer

Well I don't know I think both men and women can give pretty good advice. And then there are those who don’t. Just make sure you are judicious in who you ask for their thoughts. If you want to understand things from a woman’s perspective, ask a woman. Same thing in reverse. I often ask a man if I am trying to understand a man’s perspective. I mean it at least should be about trying to understand one another. Then appreciation can grow.

Love Doctor Brad · Accepted Answer

Navigating the dating world without a map full of male mentors feels like trying to find treasure without a compass, right? Fear not, my friend, because getting advice from women on relationships is like getting the cheat codes from the other team. Who better to understand the labyrinth of love than those who built some of its most intriguing puzzles? Women, be it your mom, sister, aunt, or female friends, offer unique perspective gems, shining a light on the mysterious ways of emotional connection and communication nuances. Plus, let's not overlook the goldmine of empathy and support they naturally bring to the table. Just remember, while the feminine touch adds flair and insight, balancing it out with a sprinkle of male perspective could give you the most well-rounded view of the battlefield of love. So, march forward, love warrior, and gather allies from both sides!

Finchie40 · Answer

Depends on the girl we are getting advice from , if it’s advice from a girl that has been in a long term relationship or marriage with someone , her advice would be better than some girl that hasn’t really experienced a long term relationship before. One thing most girls’ are good at is pretty much knowing

MisterWack · Answer

Men should definitely hear the woman’s side on relationships. Good advice from women would be show her the soft, kind, and emotional side and show her the masculine, humorous and spontaneous side, talk about your hobbies, interests, also favorite subjects. The majority of women give good advice on matters of the heart also how to make your move / know when she is into you as well as this advice. Men can trust a woman’s gentle touch when it comes to romance definitely.

Crimsyjo · Answer

Yes!!! A man should be self aware and either discuss if he has trusted female relations to that with. Or come here for more anonymous opinions haha. Not every opinion is right but it helps to try to see different points of view and learn about the opposite sex! No matter your age. I'm still trying to figure guys out after all! And I talk to loads of guys about stuff. I don't have any male family members tho.

Chazmatazz269 · Answer

We haven’t reached “Last Man Standing” yet. There are lots of men in the world. Many of whom want to be of service to others, particularly other men. There are men’s groups of all kinds everywhere in the country. I’ve even found some in California; the one state most likely to outlaw such a thing! Ell oh ell!
Don’t tell anyone! They probably just haven’t found out about them yet.

osmanthus · Answer

It's usually best for men to talk to women about men's relationships with women and for men to talk to men about relationships with other men, because most are coming from a cis-gender perspective. He can speak to a therapist or a counsellor who specializes in whatever concerns the person has yet to resolve.

HawkPerception · Answer

Women tend to give the worst relationship advice. It's funny because they could be describing what they think a guy should be like, but because they don't even know what they want it's usually something they wouldn't go for in a guy.

Only men can understand men when it comes to women.

serious · Answer

There is nothing wrong if a woman gives a advice regarding relationship issues. However, the man should only accept and act on it if he thinks it is correct according to him and his relationship.

ProbablyClueless · Answer

Getting relationship advice from women is fine, you just have to take it with a grain of salt. I would say that's true of getting advice from anyone, though.

You have to understand that the person is only going to be able to give you advice from their perspective and based on the information that you provide for them. They don't have complete context.

SotiCoto · Answer

I periodically have to remind people of this: Information is better to have than to not have. You can ask for advice without being obligated to follow it. It is better to collect all the data together, consider it for yourself and make your own decisions about what you want to do.

And sure, some people will get very irate about being asked for advice and then the advice being questioned or not immediately followed... but that is ultimately just their problem.

CrabCakes11 · Answer

Men should get advice from both men and women.

Anonymous · Answer

His family and friends want what's best for him. His family really knows him on a deep level. A mom and sister can be quite intimidating because they know him so well. And a girl friend can be too. Ultimately, it comes down to the understanding, communication, and respect you have with one another at the end of the day. And if he's wearing his big boy pants, he can make up his own mind without any advice.

bobby_bush_eater · Answer

Eh sometimes there are things we really just don't get until you hear the outside perspective of another woman. It can be very helpful and beneficial

TheSpaceGnome · Answer

Don't take advice. Listen to your own opinions and preferences, and you will end up with someone that agrees with them. That is how people should view relationships.

Nikki1989 · Answer

Have you read the advice given on here? It is clearly females that give the best advice. Most men are totally bonkers and then wonder why they are so bitter and single.

Anonymous · Answer

I think it's OK to get basic relationship advice e from women close to you (a mother a sister). I wouldn't caution about getting specific advice.

I do not fear advice from mine as I know they would not try to interfere with one of mine without good reason to.

b_lova · Answer

I don't want relationship advice from anyone who can't hold a stable relationship for over five years.

MemeSupreme · Answer

no get advice from whoever  nice to get different perspectives

Twalli · Answer

women can be more useful to discuss relationships with than men, because they know what girls are looking for and want.

sheenagwapa · Answer

if your a guy and your problem is about women then asking advise from a woman is a good idea

elizamichale1 · Answer

Why not? What's wrong in tht huhh? My brothers used to discuss such things with mum n specially with me

strateguy632 · Answer

we should because they can contribute ideas and i did that

Shy_Steve · Answer

No, Because he won't get the full picture of His Relationship issues.

Princesspd · Answer

I have gone back to my exes for relationship and marriage advice.

exitseven · Answer

I got lots of advice from females. They had a better track record than guys

sixsixsix · Answer

I don't think anybody should get advice from anybody really, I think it's best to do what you wanna do, I say that because people will steer you wrong on Purpose... I say go with your gut feeling.

Anonymous · Answer

Depends how experienced, honest and sensible they are. Probably best to follow your own advice all told. Although it is useful to have a second opinion and perspective.

Dongie · Answer

If he's got his mom and she was like my mom he could. My mom knew how women could, sometimes would be. She told me too.

dolemite58 · Answer

No the majority of women give terribly watered down advice about other women that sounds nice but doesn’t work.

Anonymous · Answer

Most relationship advice given by women is just them saying what they're supposed to say, rather than reality.

Loner111 · Answer

It can help to get a women's perspective on things.

spartan55 · Answer

Sure, if you want unintuitive horrible advice.

MK1997 · Answer

They should

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