Why don’t I have a girlfriend?

[Anonymous]

I don’t understand why I don’t have a girlfriend I’m strong (200lb and lean) I’m tall (6’4) I’m handsome I’m funny I’m smart and educated, I have a great job I make 6 figures (engineer) at 23 years old, and I’m a good Christian, and I’m so goal oriented. I work hard day in and day out I just want to be the best my bloodline has ever seen and payback everyone who helped me along the way. I just don’t understand these chicks man what am I doing wrong. Like for example Why would a girl give me her number be all flirty over text then go cold out of no where. I’m loosing my shit over this one girl and I don’t know what I’m doing wrong or what I already did. How can I get a girlfriend I just want to fall in love.

[DishLady]

Three strikes...

Strike 1: You seem to think quite a bit about yourself based on your description and probably strut rather than being humble... "My bloodline"? Come on, buddy... Be humble.

Strike 2: You're an engineer... Don't get me wrong, I love engineers very much, however... the engineer's personality type tends to be notoriously on the awkward side as a rule... unless you're with other engineers, then you lot are HILARIOUS. (SMH.) Try to broaden your circle of friends and acquaintances as well as your conversation topics.

Strike 3: You don't seem to have culled out enough time to actually date and get to know a girl, etc. Get out of your own way... make time to SEARCH FOR and FIND love...

(The one girl probably listened to you go on and on about something and bailed.)

I'll tell you a true story about a week I was proposed to by a guy... Very awkward military engineering guy I had spoken to exactly five times (once during every study group session for our final semester of school). It was my turn to host the group. He came over for the last day of our study group -- arriving an hour early looking all discombobulated. I figured it was because it was so hot outside the last week of classes and offered him ice water while I finished setting up a few snacks and things for the group.

He started talking about how nice my place was... then about his plans to start teaching at military base __ the week after graduation... and that it would be best for him to get all his business sorted before starting his job... including marrying a girl who would be well suited for that lifestyle... and would I marry him.

Now... I thought I had misheard this guy, but my roommate -- a veritable southern belle -- turned beet red and was trying not to explode with laughter at the look on my face. I nearly dropped my dishes. (I know... no pun intended.)

So I set down what I was holding and said, "Come again?" He started to repeat himself but the phone rang... my BFF from back home asking how I was doing. I told him I'd have to let him know later bc I'm sort of in a situation... hung up... took a deep breath and went back out to this guy and his crazy proposal.

While I was polite -- thanked him... mentioned being flattered... told him very firmly I had my own plans and job lined up back home... and no notion of getting married till I was more settled professionally -- to me he was a complete stranger I had basically only seen and said "hi" to about five times the entire time we were in this program. I asked him what his rush was to get married... he shrugged and confessed that he wasn't good at dating, that he didn't have time to keep fussing and looking around for "the girl" ... and several other things along those lines.

So I'm going to tell you the same thing I told him. What's your rush? You're a young guy... there's time. Try not to be such an engineer... you can't control love... Love will find you when you open your heart and not your brain. Ok blue anon?

[Nxtawm]

If all the outward stuff you say is true then it’s probably some personality aspect of yours you don’t realize that’s the issue. First off like another comment said, I think having confidence is great but be careful about boasting about yourself, it can come off as having a big ego. A good balance of confidence and humbleness is the best.

If you have any guy friends you can talk to or better yet female friends, I think it’s best to ask them what you might be doing wrong since they have a better grasp of your actual personality and would be able to give clearer advice. If not, then maybe look back on the recent convos you had with girls before they suddenly go cold and ghost you. Re-read it a few times, were you coming on too strong? Rushing things? Maybe talking too much about yourself and not asking them any questions back? You could have a red flag you don’t realize. It could even just be as simple as them realizing you guys have different goals and expectations in life. But yeah I think in general, focus more about working on your personality and don’t be in a rush, you’re still young, there’s plenty of time to find the right one. You’ll eventually find someone

[molonski2]

Man , you are an awesome catch , dont worry about em , just be super selective and wait bro , when you are not seeking too hard , they will be lining up for you , for sure , dont worry.

[jahaims]

Most people aren't suitable for a relationship. You have to find someone with the same morals and values. Find someone else in the same cult as you.

[AI Opinion]

Aiming to sprinkle a bit of love wisdom here! First off, love the energy and the stellar qualities you've got going on. Sounds like you're a catch! Being lean, tall, handsome, and successful is fantastic, but sometimes, love is like that elusive puzzle piece that hides until the rest of the picture is just right. It's not just about ticking the desirable boxes; it's about connecting on a deeper, emotional level.

Now, about the ladies going cold - ah, the classic lovebombing to ghosting transition. It's confusing, right? It could be that the initial connection felt promising, but then something didn't click for her. Maybe the vibe shifted, or she felt overwhelmed. Communication is key, so if you sense a change, gently ask what's up. It shows you're attentive and care about the connection.

Lastly, don't let the quest for love turn into frustration. Keep that heart of yours open and genuine. Love isn't a trophy to win but a journey to enjoy. Stay true to yourself, keep engaging with others, and don't forget - sometimes love finds you when you least expect it. Keep shining! ✨💕

[Apple1996]

You are giving too much desperate energy and girls don't like that

[coxoabean]

I'm sorry you're feeling this way. They could take you as desperate possibly if you come off as that. There will be guys who have it all, the looks, money, they're strong and just great, but they aren't very confident and are desperate. For me that turns me away. Now there's a difference though between having some confidence and being overly confident as well. I think most Girls do not want a prideful guy who thinks he deserves it all either. Other than that though you do sound like a great guy... And I hope you will meet someone!

[Hannajenky]

Sounds like you need to find someone who values all of the things you mentioned specifically, which means the list of women who you’ll be compatible with is quite small.

one red flag, if someone told me they wanted to be the best of their bloodline I would immediately ghost them

[Asker]

Maybe that last part came off a little aggressive but can u explain why it’s a red flag? I just want to be the best.

[Hannajenky]

Anyone who talks about bloodlines is generally racist trash

[Asker]

Don’t take it the wrong way I’m not a racist. I just want to be the old guy with a huge estate who has the whole family over All the time to enjoy it and barbecue while I sit back and watch every reap the fruits of my labor. Like my grandfather would do. He was the most successful in my family from what I’ve seen him and my parents. I want to do what they did but x10

[Kelley1]

You are not high value enough to have who you want. Nor do you deserve who you want. However, you can have a fat girl as your girlfriend. You will find a girlfriend if you significantly lower your standards to include big, older, and homely women.

[leftovercream_]

My advice would be start looking at girls as friends. Start of as friendships. If you’re compatible enough you’ll eventually fall in love and make it. But tbh I’m currently in a similar situation because when u have goals and u are career oriented, people don’t find u cool enough (which is odd lol). Make ur career and trust me all these dudes and babes will come like flies. Goodluck with ur career!!!

[CrabCakes11]

It’s probably because of your obviously inflated ego. Please work on that. Also the Christianity part. That’s not attractive to women

[Anonymous]

The reason you don't have one is because nothing you just said about yourself is true.

[Asker]

It is true. I swear to God it is the only thing I could say about my self that’s negative is I have to work on my maturity, I could always have more money, I do need to buy a car but in nyc the trains work well so I haven’t stressed to much about that, I talk too much and could be a better listener, and I’m a little obsessive okay very obsessive

[In_Trance]

You're obviously doing something wrong.
None of the shit you mentioned matters

[Mwolf]

DM me

[Mwolf]

If you want the real details you can message me. Sometimes the harder you try the harder it becomes. Once you are okay with being single only then can you be ready to be in a relationship involving another. Don't rush it. Would you rather have several meaningless exes or maybe wait a few years and find the perfect one?