It's essential to have common interests to maintain a long term relationship. Agree or Disagree?

[HawkPerception]

Agree

Disagree

[DishLady]

Even if your active intellectual and creative interests/hobbies don’t align precisely, it’s important to be able to understand, share and appreciate this part of each other’s lives.


So, for example, if I’m into art, history and music… meanwhile, my man is into historical and contemporary weaponry and several other things as wel….


The first conceptual overlap — craftsmanship of historical weaponry — becomes a point of commonality to begin letting each enter the mind and thoughts of the other to better understand their perspective (s) by exploring this topic/exhibit/etc. together.


From this newly established point of commonality, discussions about other topics (either related or randomly tangent) will begin to pop up… next thing you know, you’re engaging in each other’s interests with ease on a regular basis. Both the guy and the gal WANT to learn more about each other’s interests even though she may be part of a monthly book/travel club while he may be part of a historical society.


The essential thing is to appreciate the other person’s passion and enthusiasm (which are of course also reflected in their love for their SO ❤️.)

[HawkPerception]

Really well thought out and well said as always!

[DishLady]

Thanks HP. :)

[LazerBean]

I don't think it's essential, but I strongly believe that it very much helps. Having the same values is essential, but you can work around not having the same interests. I will say though, it is really nice when you and your partner always feel like doing the same stuff and you don't have to compromise very often. A lot of times the friction that I do see in couples does stem from them not having the same idea of what "fun" is. But again, that can be worked around if they are both loving and understanding of each other.

[Vesuvius87]

Yes, I believe being compatible on activities, goals and/or beliefs Is essential for a relationship to progress and to enhance the bonding progress. If the only reason you're in a relationship or got married is because you're in love (the moon and the stars) and you haven't even done the vetting nor even know if there is compatibility, that's going down fast with arguments. You don't live just out of feelings. There is more than just feelings needed. Selecting a relationship just base on attraction and feelings but nothing else to it is a recipe for disaster in the near future.

[Nirmroth]

I disagreed, came from a 8 year rl were both of us had different interests but shared values. It eventually run its course and ended but 8 years is pretty long to proof the point that it ain't essential.

Right now I am dating a girl with the mindset of long term rl were the only common interests are wanting to travel and having an active life style. Otherwise we enjoy completly different things while ofc sharing same values/mindset.

In hindsight I must say common interests aren't essential but make it easier to bond with your partner. To much common interests however would make things boring in my opinion, I loved about my past rl that I learned a lot of new stuff even I didn't share the same motivation or interest in her hobbies.

[MisterWack]

Agreed, common interests keep couples together while also having activities they both find enjoyable: Watching movies together, watching tv shows together, watching porn together, making sweet love together, fishing together, hiking together, playing board games / video games together, etc.

[RavVid]

It is essential to have common morals and world view but not interests.

You'll have common interests such as bills and develop disparate interests. Virtually everyone likes beautiful vistas but not everyone wants to hike 5 days to them. And in time one of you might not be able to hike for 5 days.

[SugarSugarplum]

In my experience, I never hear someone talk about common interests when they are thinking of dating someone, or looking for someone to date. I usually hear it as an excuse why a friend wants to break up with someone.

"But you've been together for 3 years and gotten along fine!"

"Yeah but we have no common interests."

[HawkPerception]

Lol yeah that proves the correlation 😂😂😂

Clearly the people that don't consider common interests when looking for relationships usually end it because there's a lack of them.

I would go so far as to say that only the more intelligent people have figured out that common interests are important.

[HighValue]

I always try to find some common interests when looking for a potential partner. Pretty much if she isn't interested in gaming and/or sporty activities, there is no interest from me.

[thegreenyogi]

I agree to some extent. I think it's acceptable to have different interests as long as said interests don't become an obstacle to freedom within the couple meaning that your partner dislikes it so much he/she will find ways for you to stop dedicating time to interests they don't share with you. Balance.

[genericname85]

i would say you don't necessarily have common interests. it sure helps but what you definitely need is a mutually compatible vision of a shared future.

[Shiningtempest]

@HawkPerception Having a common interest is vital in order to maintain a long term relationship. Anyone who thinks a common interest isn't vital is kidding themselves.

[HawkPerception]

I agree

[PBandJ_Nerd]

Common interests helps with the bonding part of the relationship. Having at least a few is good.

[Jessikaah91]

It is sometimes because then you have things to do together but also good to be able to do your own thing too sometimes. but if you have absolutely no common interest there'd be nothing to do together as a couple.

[sage2021]

Well, his passion in life was astronomy, astrophysics and the Cosmos.
I tried to get interested in it, but it was like a foreign language to me. Way over my head.

[HawkPerception]

Well I mean astrophysicists have "compatibility" with anyone just from saying they're an astrophysicist 😂

[Miristheiss]

No totally.

They need to have common values, common life goals, common belief system, views on faith, marriage, children, sex, handling money.

Whether she likes to read and he like rock climbing is meaningless.

[exitseven]

Agree. If you really have no common interests just sex it will not last

[White_Swan_]

Yes, I agree, because in a relationship everything is and has to be done jointly, so both parties have to be compatible.

[KelsoAlexander]

You should have some things in common to bond over but have differences that help both get out of their comfort zones, at least in my opinion.

[HighValue]

Compatible morals, compatible long term life goals, and at least a couple compatible interests are essential for a relationship to last.

[_Ashley__]

Absolutely! Otherwise the relationship will die down

[kitty71]

Does this work also in the age gap issue? Lets say the man is 43 and the girlfriend is 28

[HawkPerception]

I personally believe so. I think the reason that a 43 year old and a 28 year old would not work after some time is that they have a disconnect with similar interests. It COULD work, but it would just be harder.

[Jason2469]

If my wife spent any time not fucking or taking care of the kids I'd divorce her in a second.

[DarkLegacy]

I agree with this yes

[handsomelad70]

Not always but usually it applies.

[the29thhuman]

I wish we could laugh at questions.

[HawkPerception]

It's fully within your power to laugh at the question. I don't see any policies against laughing 😂 What a dark day that would be if they start cancelling laughter 😰

[GeminiDiamond]

Agree.