Is there a point in a relationship where a man should pay all of the bills?

Question

D_Bone_Steak · Accepted Answer

In general agreement with the update. Like I'm a stay-at-home Dad and don't work, but I don't just lay around the house either. I clean, I cook, and I hang out in my own spaces mainly and not part of the mess that I take care of. I workout instead of getting fat. I'm not a shop-a-holic that constantly wants new shit for no reason.

I'm a trad-drizzle drizzle-man.

A lot of women take a position I'm in and seem to go full retard. Like instead of using that free time to better themselves, they get fat. Or they'll get some shitty job and keep all the money for themselves and buy stupid shit with his money while trying to make everything theirs. ... or they'll spend their free time finding dick. ... and the list could keep going, but my point is made.

Basically, you give me free time and I have fun playing video games, trolling here and on the internet in general, working out, and all sorts of shit.

Give her free time and she's bored. The devil and idol hands and all that. She misses attention. So I conclude it's better to have a stay-at-home man. Make these bitches work.

Is there a point in a relationship where a man should pay all of the bills?

sawno · Accepted Answer

Of course, especially if she is taking care of the children. Relationships are partnerships so you need to divide the roles fairly. If she's going to raise the children properly that means she can't have a (full time) job since you want your children to be raised with good values rather than a strangers values. And if she's not having time for a proper job as a result she's not going to earn enough money to pay those bills, but she is contributing real value to the family. After all day care is also super expensive. So I would not consider this imbalanced at all.

MzAsh · Accepted Answer

The best approach is a flexible one that both are comfortable with.

Women need to understand exactly what they’re agreeing to if they’re not sharing in the financial responsibilities. I hear from many that don’t expect that he’s not going to be as engaged with the kids or domestic responsibilities. They have a say in the matter, but many wait until their leverage is long gone.

DishLady · Accepted Answer

ALL? Talk to @tonymetal___86 who actively volunteers for that sort of situation. I personally “tap out” when someone isn’t open to a proper 50/50 partnership.

Love Doctor Brad · Accepted Answer

Diving right into the heart of the matter, the question of whether a man should pay all of the bills in a relationship isn't a one-size-fits-all situation. It really boils down to the dynamics of the relationship and what both partners are comfortable with. Some couples love the traditional vibe, with one taking on the role of the primary provider, while others might prefer splitting things equally to feel more in harmony. It's all about finding that sweet spot where both feel valued and respected.

Communication is key, as always. It's crucial to have an open and honest conversation about finances, expectations, and where each person is at. Lovebombing someone with generosity sounds romantic but without talking it through, it might lead to misunderstandings or feelings of imbalance.

So, no steadfast rule saying a man "should" pay all the bills, but if it's something both partners agree on and it makes them both happy, why not? Just ensure it's a decision made from love, not expectation, and keep checking in with each other to make sure it continues to work for both of you. Remember, relationships are about partnership and balance, not just financial contributions. 😉

Apple1996 · Answer

When they have kids or get married the man should be the main provider

Avicenna · Answer

Only if he's the sole breadwinner. Otherwise, the couple should decide how to split the bills.

TommyMountainFigure · Answer

When you're married and have a shared bank account. Bills come out by standing order. I put all my earnings in there except for some I save back for a rainy day and other which I use to pay for holidays and presents etc.

My Wife puts her earnings in there too, so for us the bills aren't a case of who pays what.. and that works extremely well

If the dynamic changed then we would alter it accordingly but we are a team, and if I was the only one working, yes it would be on me to pay all the bills.. only I would never see it that way!

Unit1 · Answer

Imagine putting women in men's shoes for once with this matter. They'll probably go like

Unless she's a real one and has sympathy and understanding for us and goes like this instead

Be that as it may, in our modern times there's not really much of an excuse to not contribute to afford a stress free living. After all money is indeed everything.

electromagnetic · Answer

In this economy, I’m not sure every relationship can last with the man covering all bills unless he’s making bank. I’m thankful to work from home and my partner owns his own company. We make a good living and I don’t necessarily have to cover bills but we do share costs of living. We split the mortgage for our condo between us and he covers the rest of the bills. I intern cover date nights or treats and our car’s insurance. But I’m fortunate enough which isn’t the same for others.

i think each relationship is different when it comes to financials. There really isn’t an exact point to which whom should cover what bill. It’s shared living unless he says he’s financially stable to support the whole team.

midnightmoon05 · Answer

Only time a man should be paying everything is when he married a supportive woman!!
A supportive woman is a woman who will stand by him through thick and thin… share similar life goals/values to raise a family with him. She is raised from a family with similar values so that their children will continue to pass down these traditions. These includes: 1. Education 2. Medical 3. Financial 4. Respect and 5. Love.
she puts her family and her spouse first.
she will help her husband/family get to a better place. She doesn’t bring down the family or follow the decay of the society.
she doesn’t stay home the whole time… once kids are in school, she returns to the work force or family business so that she knows what is going on and be her husbands support inside the house and outside of the house.

Caroline91 · Answer

I would feel totally useless if I "laid around the house," ever. Working and receiving a pay check or not, I am working for the relationship/family. If we are a committed couple, whatever money we earn is our money. I'm not talking about money brought in to the relationship at the start or inheritances. I see those as belonging to the partner who receives those assets. They can share or not. But, if I am contributing by not working outside the home, in order to be the main hands on caretaker of our children, then the money he brings home from outside work is equally mine. And we decide together how it is spent, including each of us having a portion for ourselves that is discretionary.

just_a_potato · Answer

I think if they're both working, it's only fair they both take turns. Especially if they're married, one equal house unit, why not help each other with love? Of course, this changes if the woman is expected to be at home full time, the man has to pay for everything then.

IslaTheWitch · Answer

doesn't it depend on the agreements between partners how they split efforts?

fortunately, it never happened in my relationships... there were periods when I or my partner didn't have a job for a short time... but nothing longer than 2 or 3 months

worldscolide · Answer

It really depends. My wife is a stay at home wife. So I pay for everything. If your wife or girlfriend is not a stay at home wife or girlfriend, if she works, then the bills should be split based on how much each partner makes. Who ever makes more pays more.

Alli112 · Answer

Doesn't it just depend on the family's financial situation? Whoever is doing work that brings an income should pay, preferably in a manner that reflects the relative incomes and abilities, and both people should be doing some kind of work for the family, income or no income. The specifics are up to the individuals.

hahahmm · Answer

a.) When married to a traditional woman. If she's a hardcore feminist & you were dumb enough to marry her, let her pay 50% of all bills. But she will still take your money when she divorces you.

b.) When you are a high earner and living with a much lower earner. But of course you would be dumb to be in that situation unless you have a really good reason to think you're headed towards marriage. And she thinks that too.

HighValue · Answer

To be "traditional" and for the man to pay for all support, the woman has to be a virgin waiting for marriage, and the man makes ALL of the important decisions in the relationship, including all purchases, and only provides ONE car for the family (which he is the one using for work, etc..

If the woman is not traditional, the man should NEVER treat her traditionally.

Anonymous · Answer

I feel like I'll never reach that point, due to the abusive relationships I've suffered. I share my journey of abuse in case it helps anyone else on the site.

CieloAzul · Answer

It depends on the type of marriage. Some couples agree that at the beginning of the marriage that the wife is taking care of the kids and the house and the husband is the main provider. Other couples if they both work the wife will pay some. It isn’t about if there is point or not, it’s more about commitment to the original agreement.

Lionman95 · Answer

I would say there are two scenarios in which a man should pay all the bills. One of is third option if she doesn´t go to work and the other one is if he says he will in a way that he offers paying all the bills.

OddBeMe · Answer

For harmony…no one gender should be 100% in control of anytime. Not saying stay at home moms are wrong, but they contribute probably even more.

I guess I mean don’t “think” you are in total control of finances when she probably pulls her weight.

4ngelic · Answer

accidently clicked the wrong thing. ment to pick the 3rd option

Telekinetic-Potato · Answer

when she stays home, takes care of the kids and keeps your balls drained

Anonymous · Answer

When he has enough disposable income to pay all of them AND does not have a problem with paying all of them. Because, just because he has does not mean it's solely his responsibility.

I will add that each relationship dynamic is different and needs to be taken into consideration.

Emeraldskies · Answer

If you both share the house and both work you share the bills. If you’ve made an agreement where she’s a stay at home mom then you pay the bills. She should get a job after the kids go to school however if you decided her job was stay at home mom then that’s what she’ll think it’ll always be. Just communicate how you feel. Hey, once the kids are in school do you think you’ll feel more fulfilled if you get a job? Something along those lines.

RavVid · Answer

Know a couple who have been fighting over this all weekend. I am on the guys side - her earnings should go into the pot. She says she feels like baggage.

HaveNoName · Answer

That is the responsibility of any married man. If the woman choses to do so and if she spends on something she wants to pay herself, that is a different matter.

Outside marriage, nothing matters. Do what you chose.

admles · Answer

Only if she is a stay at home wife / mum. Otherwise, get your butt to work woman and share the burden.

dustybiker2 · Answer

There is no one answer. Couples are not cookie cutter. Life changes in an instant.

nawtee_me · Answer

Yes, it is called marriage and he should be paying the bills with her money too….

bobby_bush_eater · Answer

For me it's marriage because once we're married we'll be pursuing children. Before that I will mostly pay but I'm not paying for their separate bills until she's my wife

KostasKouvalis · Answer

My dad has been doing that throughout his whole marriage. He is the breadwinner

KittygosMeoWW · Answer

There should be a point where he should be willing to if needed but it’s not mandatory

msc545 · Answer

NO - any of those independent women that don't need a man can pay their own bills.

yes_goddess · Answer

From the very beginning, otherwise you might give the wrong impression that you're not willing to serve her every need.

LiamJHayden · Answer

When his wife is a stay at home mom.

Dongie · Answer

Children. Otherwise she's a spoiled, lazy ho.

Ms_Facesitter · Answer

Only option three seems right to me.

SkatPak392 · Answer

yes, he's not married, and single with no kids.

Anonymous · Answer

Yes, at marriage.

Is there a point in a relationship where a man should pay all of the bills?

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Should the husband pay all of the household bills?

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