Why do several men expect a woman to stay and remain loyal to a cheater?

[Anonymous]

Even when it's a wife that's filing for divorce after the husband cheats (valid reason to divorce), several male posters still expected her to stay. Or even questioned what she did for him to cheat. Or if a woman cheats back, all of the sudden only she's the bad person but the guy is magically absolved just because he's a guy. The excuses was that a man can cheat whenever he wants to but still love his wife or girlfriend meanwhile when the woman cheats, she doesn't loves him anymore and already checked out.

For me it changes nothing. Cheating still happened, regardless of the reason and if done in a marriage then you still broke your vows.

Ironically then many men are complaining about why women are staying with bad men? They themselves are promoting this too by their hypocrisy and expecting more of us to still stay with cheaters. A wife wanted to divorce her cheating husband and a couple male posters wanted her to still stay with him.

[Summeroflove]

Yep….. probably other cheaters see most cheaters regardless of sex have rules for you they never follow themselves. If they cheat they justify it but if you cheat it’s another story.

Being cheated on is destructive you shouldn’t scoop yo their level and cheat yourself you just leave the relationship. I tell people once someone cheats it’s OVER there is no going back.

Ironically there are many men saying something you know not all men think alike though right we aren’t in a hive mind and neither are women. There may be dudes with another point of view. Whether it’s right or wrong. But yes for men who speak out of both sides of their mouth (or women) there are those people tou can’t win with. Anything you do is wrong so they can feel better about their own life choices.

I think if someone intentionally picks shitty people it speaks to their character as well

[Dargil]

Cheating is a moral disease. Best to expel the perp the first instance. That includes friends with benefits and Side Chicks. If you want society to improve, it starts with you. Throw the bum out.

[Nikki1989]

I have read that 100s of times on here over the years. Men who say otherwise obviously must have selective vision.

It is amusing that men whine about the “all men are pigs” tag, but the next minute they say something that proves that some men are just that. Hypocrites.

[Asker]

The most ridiculous behavior among several hypocritical men are they keep asking ''Why do girls like jerk, why do women take back cheaters'' but then come up with BS ''a man is a key and a woman a lock'' excuses for why men can sleep around while in a relationship or marriage but a woman can't. I thought they wanted more women not to put up with BS. By being hypocrites, they are enabling women to tolerate cheaters.

[avery58]

Those are probably just the red pilled psychos

[AI Opinion]

Navigating the stormy seas of love and loyalty, aren't we? It's quite the riddle why some folks wear rose-colored glasses when staring at infidelity, isn't it? The ol' double standard rears its ugly head, painting scenarios where a man's misstep is just a stumble, but if a woman slips, it's a freefall. Love isn't a game of who can cheat and get away with it. It's about mutual respect, trust, and, yes, loyalty. Everyone deserves a partner who treasures them, not one who turns love into a game of Monopoly. Cheating, regardless of who's doing the dirty, is a breach of trust. Period. Encouraging someone to stay with a cheater? That's like advising someone to keep walking with a pebble in their shoe—it's only going to hurt more with every step. Love should lift you up, not keep you guessing why you're not enough. Let's champion love that respects boundaries and honors commitments, and leave the double standards in the dust! 🚀💔✨

[ohsheeT]

Not I I would be the first one to tell her to go..
Just because at the moment he was cheating he thought about it he knew he was cheating and he still did it.
And then when he got home he acted like nothing even happened and he was still in love with his wife and he lived that life that lie. Each and everyday.. thinking he was so much smarter than her... forever however long. . well until he got caught and then everything changes right if I was a woman I would say see you just like I'm me and I would say see you if it is vice versa

[V_Injector]

Way to make "several" men sound like men in general. Give me an example and I will analyze it.

Cheating is a problem that women are now beating men at doing. So what is the argument again?

How about we keep it a non-gendered issue, and argue the moral points.

[DanicaPhoenix]

A fair point, this should be a non-gender-based question as cheating is bad no matter the gender of the person doing it or how they identify themselves.

[Purpleronnie]

Being fair , This is not a gender issue, one could say both men and women make questionable judgements and have irrational and perhaps even delusional expectations of how a relationship “should” work around many aspects including fidelity but that’s on them , they bring their values and decide / communicate their expectations to each other, they make the rules and they decide for them. The why is relevant only to them. You seem far too vexed and frustrated , perhaps even angered attempting to apply logic / reason to things that are entirely subjective.. and you can't

[DanicaPhoenix]

Because they are morons? I don't know for sure why anyone would expect that. If someone cheats, they don't deserve loyalty. I've not been in this site that long but, I don't think I've seen a post to say that.

[Asker]

yeah cheaters deserved to be dumped immediately and if married, divorced right away.

[DanicaPhoenix]

exactly, no one should be expected to stay with someone they can't trust.

[Taylor22424]

Unless you end up homeless...

That's the situation with my main girl...

Open on my end, closed on hers... just like that. She have a problem, she can live in the streets...

[DanicaPhoenix]

@Taylor22424 there is always an alternative. If she really thinks she will have nothing without you and has to let you treat her poorly due to that, I feel sorry for her. I'd never allow myself to be to a point where I have to depend on someone else just to have things.

[Taylor22424]

Of course there is an alternative... it's the streets. Have you not read what I wrote?

[DanicaPhoenix]

@Taylor22424 I will answer the question. Yes, I fully read and understand what you said, a fact that my answer should have made very clear. I will make no further comments however since it's clear I've gone right over your head.

[Taylor22424]

Yeah your answer was clear. You just end up repeating what I said, using the word "alternative".

That alternative is "homelessness"

[ZS007]

there is this mindset that a woman who fucks around is a hoe but a man who does will get congratulated.

Personally i believe this behaviour is wrong no matter the gender. Cheating included.

[Asker]

Exactly. Wrong is wrong.

[DanicaPhoenix]

Yes, that is a fair statement. Cheating is cheating, no matter the gender or how the person doing it identifies. If you like another person, show them and the person you're with the decency to end the current relationship before starting another. It's better to be in one relationship that gets 100% from you, than failing at two that at most will get 50% (if even that). And since some in this thread will need the clarification, when I say "you" in this statement, I'm not pointing directly at the person I am replying to. I'm making a general statement that applies to everyone, including myself.

[HelpfulWoman]

there are always dodgy people who will forgive a cheater and blame it on the blameless partner. it does easily help you identify dumbasses to avoid in life

[Asker]

exactly. I hate cheaters of both genders. A cheater deserves to get dumped.

[Berethor]

Heard the saying a man is like a key, a woman is like a lock? also no one wants a single mom.

https://allthetropes.org/wiki/My_Girl_Is_Not_a_Slut

[The_Confusion]

@Berethor did you manage to seduce @emyywolf yet?

[Berethor]

@The_Confusion she a ho, why would I want to? also I think that she blocked me.

[Asker]

You realize the longer you wait for that virgin woman, the more likely you're going to remain single. She's going to likely be in her early 20's by then and you're going to be nearly 40. Nearly 40 and still into ''never even been kissed'' virgins?

[Berethor]

I don't see why it surprise, it common for men to look for young women, I take a step further, looking for a virgin, yea it gets harder to find a quality women at my age, and I got offers from hos and about single moms, but I don't want damaged goods, so it didn't excited me.

www.urbandictionary.com/define.php

[Asker]

You might have issues with the college aged girl's family. If it's a caring and loving family, for sure they aren't going to like that at all. They aren't going to be happy about a nearly 40 year-old man preying on their young girl.

[Berethor]

First I need to find a college aged girl, I would be worried about her family later. :)

[ManOnFire]

I wouldn't pay attention to whatever guys said that, they are clearly delusional. Cheating is still wrong when a man does it, however you do have a lot of women who know the guy is cheating and they still want to hold on to him or are scared to leave him.

In even worse situations, there are women who hate that the guy is cheating on him, when she was once a woman he left another woman for, and she knew it.

[art84]

My brother wife cheated on him three times. He took her back after three times and then she filed for divorce. So why would my brother stay with a women who was cheating on him? The only reason was for the children though his wife wanted to mess around behind his back so she got divorced.

[Asker]

Cheaters of both genders deserved to get dumped. I would've been cool if the cheating wife got nothing but debts.

[DanicaPhoenix]

I've heard a few stories like this. One of them was an older cousin. She stayed with him, "for the children." In reality, the children, heard her crying herself to sleep every other night when he was out cause "he was working." In the end the only time they had true happiness in the home was when she finally said enough was enough and took the children and moved into her own place and filed for divorce. She now has a husband that treats her right and the kids now see what a healthy relationship should look like. I only wish they could have seen that before they were almost adults themselves.

[art84]

@DanicaPhoenix

My brother's ex wife is happy now being single and has the girls. Lives with her parent so the girls get to spend time with their grandparents. My nieces (7/5) now 9 and 7, the older one obviously saw what was happening in the relationship. My brother's wife was "working" nights though she was partying at bars and coming home the next day. My brother has moved on and married and happy as well with his new wife and three kids.

[DanicaPhoenix]

@art84

I'm glad it all worked out to be a better situation for him and his girls. I hope the girls aren't negatively affected by anything. Sometimes people don't realize how much they are really hurting the children by continuing allow a toxic situation because they think it is best for the kids.

[art84]

@DanicaPhoenix

The girls are happy though they don't talk to us whenever we see them. I guess the mom doesn't want them talking to us. We never had a relationship with the girls especially when they were little. I hope when they get older that they will come around.

[DanicaPhoenix]

@art84

I hope they will. Like you say, they may not be talking to you now just because they don't want to put up with what their mom will say or do if she finds out.

[Surferboi_02]

To be honest most guys just date for the title and don't think ago t the girls feeling they just go around and try to fuck every girl they like. Personally I would not be able to live with myself if I cheated and wouldn't want forgiveness or loyalty after that.

[beefcakebradybatson]

It's because historically , a woman has keen charged with maintaining a marriage domestically while her husband provides financially, and if the husband strays , the wife is blamed for not being accomodating enough to her husband, which caused his faithlessness.

[Radiate143]

Yep, then they will go she chose badly but she's also an abandoned. Men want no accountability and love to blame.

[Radiate143]

Test

[Anonymous]

"Even when it's a wife that's filing for divorce after the husband cheats (valid reason to divorce), several male posters still expected her to stay"

Can you provide some links of examples of this ^. In all my years on GAG I don't think I've ever seen it.

[MLGbreezy]

You must be talking about red pill men because regular men do not think like this it’s as simple as that.

[Asker]

I hope not. I don't find it normal for a man to encourage a woman to tolerate getting cheated on.

[MLGbreezy]

I mean I feel like that how you need to think about these things in general I feel like that just common sense there’s billions of woman on the planet I don’t think every scummy girl bashes men is all woman plenty of kind ones out there who will come to the defense of men and vice versa not all men are cheaters and the ones who encourage that behavior are the minority

[genericname85]

Several men aren't representative for men in general. Don't confuse this with a gender issue. It's a character flaw issue that's present in all genders. You can answer that question using your own empathy

[Vegasrunner]

Yea, it's true sex doesn't mean as much to a man and it's more difficult to get so if a man has sex with another woman it's not a big deal bit if a woman does she's clearly has feelings for the guy she's having sex with.

[exitseven]

Whenever I hear about a guy cheating on his wife I always expect him to get kicked out and taken to the cleaners.

[jshm2]

Because they will often view her as a dividend, and him as a commodity.

[Ladsin2]

Because men and women's roles in relationships are different. Cheating is wrong from a man, but he hasn't stopped performing his role.

[Asker]

yet cheating still happened and by tolerating cheating, this contradicts men complaints about women selecting jerks that cheat and mistreats them. Over the years men keep asking the same questions over and over about why women pick bad men over good, faithful ones, about why we put up with crap. Meanwhile encouraging women to enable cheating men, so that's a hypocrisy right there.

[Asker]

They should be encouraging the opposite, to not tolerate garbage, that being alone is better than being with bad company.

[Ladsin2]

Conservative men have always said that cheating is morally wrong.

[ProbablyClueless]

You're asking why a self centered person is acting self centered. It's just who they are.

[Anonymous]

Who cares. If only we women worked equally as hard not to marry cheaters then this wouldn't even be an issue.

[Asker]

You said we women and yet you're blue.

[Opinion Owner]

Yeah, I think I typed "you" and it changed it to "we".😆 the auticorrect sucks.

[dragoblack]

We don't expect loyalty to cheaters. If anyone in the relationship cheats, relationship contract is broken, there is no obligations of loyalty.

[Aiko_E_Lara]

Same reason why several women expect the man to stay and remain loyal to a cheater and gold digger

[Asker]

I've seen that too but at a lesser rate. More men encourage women to tolerate cheaters and are more hypocritical about it then women.

[Aiko_E_Lara]

Then i've seen men doing it at lesser rate. How does anecdotes really prove what you said?

[Taylor22424]

Same with my main girl. It's open on my end, closed on hers. She lives for free. She gets the privilege of not working... Idc

She don't like it, she can get out and be homeless... she got nowhere else to go.

[fentom]

I think it has to do with the way these men were raised, they were made to believe that it is okay to be a cheater - even if we all know that it is a nasty habit.

[Anonymous]

I've seen it way more often that men are expected to forgive infidelity. Because when women cheat society blames the husband.

[nawtee_me]

It is so they can continue to cheat on you….

[LiamJHayden]

They are hypocrites.