I found scratches on my boyfriend’s back. What should I do?

[keira]

Saturday night, I saw four scratches on my boyfriend’s back while trimming his neck. They looked like someone had scratched him during sex. When I asked, he gave excuses—work injury, his daughter, or me (I keep my nails short). He got defensive, and I brought up a female coworker I’m suspicious of. He got angry, accused me of loving drama, and sent me a wall of texts saying I push him too much and that our future together looks “very sad.” I asked for a week of no contact, but now I’m doubting everything and feel totally lost. Any advice?

[Mehrsia]

I believe you are the one who knows the answer. It depends on many things. How long you guys are dating? Is it the isolated incident or you have other types of suspicious situations with him?

How about your relationship? Is. it a solid loving relationship with a promise for a future or it is on and off type of thing with lots of emotional turmoil?
Why did you bring up his colleague? Why you are suspicious of her in. specific? Did yhey have any history or did he talk about her fondly?
Have you ever been in similar situation to accuse each others of infidelity?
Give him a benefit of doubt is he did not show any sign of cheating by now and if your relationship is healthy and strong.
Watch him. for sometimes and see for yourself if he is trustworthy enough to keep or not.
If he is relaiable person and honest, but still you can not trust him then it is notmgoing to work for you. You will drive yourself mad of being with him even if he does not do anything wrong.
Give yourself time, think it through and then act.

[Radiate143]

Yep. He was smashing someone else. Don't doubt a thing. It is what it is. You'll go back and you'll be miserable. Trust me. You're losing nothing by leaving.

Things You will gain when you leave

• A sense of strength
• A sense of self worth
• Diginity
• Clarity of mind
• An appetite
• Sleep
• Your skin will be nicer
• Your body won't ache
• No panic attacks and anxiety wondering about him

When you go, he will do all the things and stop cheating for a bit because he doesn't want to lose his place to live.

You're thinking about him and he's thinking about his pocket

Yiu meed to think about you.

[Radiate143]

Sorry thought you lived together. Cut your losses now. There is nothing but misery ahead.

[Anonymous]

Weirdly enough, as a child (8 years old to teen years) my mother would point out scratches on my back when I didn’t scratch back there / was just sleeping. The scratches would look obvious and big…. Yet no explanation for how they got there. Maybe it is the same thing (not saying it is)

Also honestly if my girlfriend accused me of sleeping with a coworker when I didn’t I’d get defensive too and thinking our love is shaken up to come up with such a ridiculous notion (not saying it is)

Maybe ask the coworker if she’s been seeing your boyfriend if she says yes then break up & never talk to his sorry ass again….. If you seriously don’t trust him, break up regardless of what happened or didn’t happen.

[abc3643]

OK, this is all you need to know:

He wrote "very sad".

You know who says that?
Donald Trump.
Married-3-times, "grab 'em by the pussy", serial philanderer and fabulist Donald Trump.

Your boyfriend is a likely Trump voter and that is an immediate red flag right there, but, apparently, his attitudes with women are the same as Trump's.

Yes, he needs to go.

[AI Opinion]

Ah, the plot thickens with a little mystery and drama! 😏 It sounds like you're navigating some treacherous waters here, love. Those scratches could be a sign or just an innocent mark made by a cat or a moment of clumsiness. His defensive reaction seems to trigger your red flag radar, but it's important to lean into the power of honest communication after the no-contact period. When emotions cool, seek a genuine dialogue without assumptions or accusations. Trust is the bedrock of any relationship, so if there's doubt, it's crucial to address it directly. Don’t let ghosts of mistrust haunt your relationship! 🕵️‍♀️✨ Good luck!

[Summeroflove]

Getting overly defensive is never a good sign especially if you’re a good girlfriend to him… I will say by the time you catch someone it’s probably not the first time though sometimes someone may get lucky if they mess up or are observant enough.

Many times people the first time they cheat are very careful. If you’re already suspicious then the chances of something going on are high.

[TrueConfection]

Either way, this isn't a healthy relationship. He says he's not sure how he was scratched and that right there is suspicious. If he said your future together looks sad, then that's a self-fulfilling prophecy. Trust your gut!

[Changiis07]

Could be work related or sometimes our women intuitions can be true. Has he given you other reasons for you to not trust him?

[OlderAndWiser]

His response is what you would expect for someone who is guilty as charged. Trust your instincts.

[OlderAndWiser]

Four scratches on his back. He knows how it happened, so why did he give three different explanations? Looks like he is guilty.

[DishLady]

Have him get a tetanus shot. You don't know where he's been.

[Shehnaz]

I strongly believe he accidentally made those four scratches by himself either scratching his back during periods sleep or while taking a shower. Because I too kept on noticing scratches on my back when I looked in the mirror for quite many days and every day there were fresh scratches which looked exactly like made by finger nails, I went to the doctor thinking it might be a skin condition. It was then when he explained the possibilies of it would have happened. My doctor then advised me to stop using any body lotion or parfum and instead of rubbing my back with the towel just tap dry it

Before thinking of negative possibilities did you once think about it positively?

So just because you are insecure and love drama please don't spoil or put an end to a beautiful relationship. Thanks.

[Knightwatch27]

His aggressive reaction to you raising the issue with the female coworker (unless you did it very rudely/aggressive yourself) suggests that he's definitely hiding something. There's no need to get so angry if he isn't having an affair or something. I'd demand an honest answer if I were you, if not from a cheating lover than he needs to explain whence they come from, pending the end of the no contact period.

[AgentG111]

If they are in an area you can without a doubt say another person put there because of sex, then you have your answer move on.

If not or you have never been able to do that make sure you look at everything carefully and see what work wise or children wise could actually happen.

[noohair]

If he did not reassure you then you might have a problem. What is your plan, marriage? If not, why are you with him? First, decide what you want in a relationship. Second, decide if he fits into what you want in a relationship. Then decide to keep him or move on. Good Luck.

[Anonymous]

I remember a former girlfriend accused me of something like that about 3 months into dating her. I was furious that she would confront me over something like that. Mad that I had to defend myself over something dumb and embarrassing to me, and mad that I wondered what future I was up against if I kept dating her. So in my case, being mad wasn't a sign of guilt. Just saying that just because he got angry and defensive, it doesn't mean that he was cheating.

[Anonymous]

his reaction is the only answer you need. why is he being so defensive like that? and getting angry? people only act like he did when they're guilty. just saying. he could have easily said "no baby, nothing like that happened" etc explained calmly.

[StBerryPi]

Your right he cheated! He knows the relationship is ending and he is moving on early!

No way his daughter gave them to him! Maybe if he said he scratched it or did not know!

[UnusualWeirdo]

If he gets defensive about a female you bring up then he's protective cheating, it's one thing to get excited because the accusation is wrong but defensive shows wrong doing.

[serious]

Well, you are a woman and you have seen the marks on his back so you know better. If you think that is good enough evidence to conclude he has been cheating on you then it is best to break up with him. Cheaters will always be cheaters.

[bunny_luv]

Well, you asked him and he said he didn't know and I would leave it at that. It's better to not show your insecurities and self doubt. Give it some time and try not to dwell on what you had speculated. I hope this helps.

[RavVid]

I am finding it hard to conceive of a satisfactory explanation. Work injury seems unlikely. So does daughter.

You are judge and jury on this. So you can convict and sentence without further ado.

[Open-minded99]

Always trust your instincts. He's probably cheating. No one deserves that. Plus you already know he's lying.

[Account]

Ι am pretty certain 99.99% that he did it. Don't ask me why, but based on his reaction, I am certain.

[lyrem04]

If he’s getting defensive then he definitely is hiding something. And I think intuitively you know already. Lots of love 🫶

[spartan55]

Advice? Stop jumping to conclusions and lay off the bullshit. Has he cheated? If he has ignore the second sentence and dump him.

[Gauoda_]

@keira what are you waiting for? Start...

[beefcakebradybatson]

Scratch his back yourself, but question him about the source of the scratches and if there are any more after you and he talk, ponder another lad.

[MisterMystery]

There is a clear doubt here. I don’t like dealing with things I’m suspicious of. Breaking up would be the right decision.

[snermcger]

i have had sex many times in my life. I have never had one back scratch. I kinda feel envious that someone can give it to a girl so good she lacerates him.

[13cmlong]

Go out and fuck a guy get him to give you a hickey on your inner thigh , shoulder and Tits. when he sees it , lie about how you got it , give him a taste of his own. Then tell the truth. See how he likes it

[Alex-Snow]

It does not sound like a work injury but more like a sex injury. How is your sex life with him recently? Has it changed for the better or worse?

[AmeerX]

Lol, I got a scratch on my arm and I was out in the field where I got it running in a bush. So, please don't jump to conclusions.

[In_Trance]

You're ridiculous

[Anonymous]

Call Batman, because Catwoman is trying to steal your boyfriend.

[msc545]

There are plenty of ways he could have gotten those scratches that don't involve sex. Apologize to him for being unreasonably suspicious.

[Anonymous]

My boyfriend cheated once. Now I make sure he doesn't have enough jam in his jar to cheat.

[Tomara_Jefferson]

A homemade coom jar?

[Sevenpointfive]

@Tomara_Jefferson i like that! she probably drinks it like horchata

[Logan2000]

always trust your gut instinct, especially if there has been other minor signs

[LiamJHayden]

Sounds like the trust is gone no matter what either of you does. Might as well move on.

[Intheclouds00]

You don't get scratches on your back that last for days and not know how they got there

[Anonymous]

You essentially accused him of cheating, which could explain why he got defensive. But I have no way of knowing the truth.

[Radiate143]

Scartches on back is classic proof of cheating

[Opinion Owner]

@Radiate143 It's also classic proof of other things. There are any number of possible causes.

[kaucky1]

Disloyalty gets them all the time.. If cheat cheat together morph into other people cuz we grantings

[jjj101010]

There r plenty of ways to get them I play sport and come back with them all the time. I don’t even notice them until I see them in the mirror

[Cheerfull009]

Talk with him clearly about its relationship with other woman , if he has, then break away

[purplepoppy]

Put socks on the cat.

[Sevenpointfive]

unless there's a demon in his house he's cheating

[slatyb]

He's cheating on you, and gaslighting you.

[exitseven]

maybe he has a cat?

[FunkyMonkee]

Clip the nails on your cat!

[SotiCoto]

Maybe it was just itchy and he did it himself.

[Anonymous]

It sounds like he cheated on you

[Anonymous]

My money's on him cheating

[Iron_Man]

It does sound like it

[jahaims]

If you don't trust don't date

[Wise4myage]

Ask him, he’s got some explaining to do.

[Radiate143]

She did

[Straight2thepoint]

Leave thousand of heekys and leave him.

[nawtee_me]

Cut your nails….

[RedInnocent69]

Does he was cats for a living? 😂

[Anonymous]

How hot is this co-worker? She's single?

[CandiKrunch]

It good.

[CandiKrunch]

No, not good!

[Becky316]

My gut says cheating

[TheKillerJason]

Uh oh