What are your biggest deal-breakers in a relationship beyond the obvious like infidelity?

Question

Maybe one of the smaller, less talked-about things that could make or break a relationship for you?

Nikki1989 · Accepted Answer

Immaturity Misogyny Racism Heavy Drug Use Lack of Communication skills Poor Hygiene Politically motivated, especially right-wing Narrow-mindedness Controlling No Taste In Music

Simslover92 · Accepted Answer

Being an alcoholic, being a hard drug user, lacking communication skills, and emotionally unavailable.

Love Doctor Brad · Accepted Answer

As a relationship coach here to spice things up, diving into deal-breakers is like navigating a dating minefield, isn't it? For me, it’s when someone has a lack of communication or emotional availability. Long silences might be better left for dramatic movie scenes, not relationships! And, constant negativity can be like pouring rain on your picnic of love. A little sunshine on those cloudy days can do wonders. Remember, relationships flourish with positive vibes and meaningful chatter! 😄🌼

Summeroflove · Answer

A lot of things are smaller things built up over time such as someone refusing to communicate with someone or massive differences in what someone’s looking for. If someone can’t communicate like a adult they don’t have a place in my life.

A lot of times people just put up with someone’s crap when it’s smaller amounts of it until eventually it’s major things. It’s usually one sided and double standards where they are doing things to you because you tolerate it that they would never allow you to ever do to them.

Seeing the signs someone’s a dark personality without also assuming the worst in everyone is a balancing act. But I think it’s entitlement, double standards, one sided, among other things where I would no longer wish to be with someone anymore. As well as major religious and political differences that would make us not compatible.

Vesuvius87 · Answer

Physical abuse  Heavy alcoholism or drug use Cruelty to children and animals

jennifer_bloom · Answer

I would never date a guy who lacks insight, understanding and sympathy into other people's emotional lives.

Babygirl_S · Answer

-religious or political views drastically different from mine

-a body count higher than 4

-a sexual history involving casual sex/sex with prostitutes

-smoker

-irresponsible drinking habits ( drinking more than the recommended amount of alcohol per week)

-drug addict

-dating for fun, not marriage

-polygamous or wants an “open relationship”

-criminal

-his religion gives him a right over everything even her wife’s life and basic rights. His religion gives him a right to beat his wife

-ghetto language even when he isn’t angry

-expecting me to work an equal number of hours as him and then wanting me to do most of the housework

-disrespectful behaviour but expecting respect from me

-disrespectful family members who expect respect from me but never watch their own mouths or control their actions

-preventing me from wearing elegant, form fitting clothes. Expected me to wear loose clothes even when working out which can be dangerous for me and cause injuries

-wanting me to keep my face and hair covered and wear loose gowns only in the same colour

-thinking marital rape isn’t rape

-owning or selling slaves

-saying things like he “can’t breathe in Trump’s America because he is a black MODEL happily living in a cosy apartment in NEW YORK CITY while being extremely disrespectful towards women who aren’t white ( and not his mother or sister)” or complaining about the regular checking of everyone at American airports because, according to him, Muslims should be exempted from that

michalpl00 · Answer

Being promiscuous, clubbing partying. Girls alone vacation or girls nights out. HUGE RED FLAG!!!

dressing promiscuously. Having 250 guy friends.

Lying, gaslighting, manipulating. Disrespecting, using drugs, vulgar language, need for control, being a feminist. Lots of tattoos or body modifications.

Basically my ex in a nutshell.

Green flags is honestly just respect and not needing attention and validation from other guys. Like if she shows me that i am her man. Instead of giving me signs that she got opinions when i cut out all my girl friends and options because I was serious. Love is blind, thank god she broke up with me. Now i see that she would destroy my life.

Anonymous · Answer

Micro-aggressions.

Never taking accountability.

Lack of physical touch or lack of respecting boundaries when it gets too much.

Different types of communication that don't match.

Poor hygiene.

Substance use/abuse.

molonski2 · Answer

Poor Hygiene

Moodiness

Poor language

Table manners - talking when mouth is full / Chewing with mouth open.

Speach , Diet

Lack of physical activity

Drug use / legal or otherwise

No education

Poor presentation / hence embarrassing to be around.

Zero financial literacy .

Lazy / No employment / poor general skills.

off the top of my head , there would be more.

trumpetplayerforlife · Answer

Smoking of any kind I can't stand it plus it make it hard for me to breath

Anonymous · Answer

As you said, infidelity is obviously the biggest. Some others for me are: Drug use or excessive alcohol use Not taking care of her health Not interested in marriage and children (family is the key to happiness for me) Woke ideology / excessive focus on feminist views (i. e., victim complex) Being rude or unkind to others Lack of humility

glennos89 · Answer

For me it's absolutely a deal breaker if my woman isn't emotionally available for me when I'm struggling with my feelings or have a breakdown. Sadly a lot of woman don't seem to be capable or willing to put up with a man's emotions

RavVid · Answer

Constant snide put downs and criticism or other negative interactions. I'm not in it for a bad time.

WhiteThought · Answer

It's never obvious, because everyone is different, but for me, it would be masculinity. If a woman gives off masculine energy, then I want nothing to do with her.

Caroline91 · Answer

Passive aggressiveness, lack of motivation/initiative, a lot of negativity.

KennethNoisewater · Answer

I have a trifecta. Lying, cheating and stealing. Any of those three things are grounds for termination. It’s a fairy tale relationship otherwise

Shiprex · Answer

Disrespectful behaviour and cruelty to anyone or thing is a gross trait in a person. If you're not kind be ambivalent.

Somelikeithot · Answer

Stupid. I cannot handle stupid! Not uneducated, I mean STUPID. Like 'I left my coat outside and it got wet and now I'm pissed off' kinda thing stupid. I'm talking, 'look there's a bear, quick take my picture with it!' I mean stupid like, 'the ad said if I send $300 it will turn into $600 by the next full moon! Where's my purse?' Kind of stupid. I can't handle it.

exitseven · Answer

If she was into drugs or was a serial liar or both.

genericname85 · Answer

Being unable to have alone time cause the partner doesn't give you room to breathe.

BobbyLee789 · Answer

For me there needs to be trust. It hurts to be accused of really crazy conspiratorial things that you'd only find in a mystery novel.

MrChinaski · Answer

Infidelity is not an issue for me. Lying. Betraying. Failing to support our children. The list can go on. But infidelity is not a member of my list.

Ad_Quid_Orator · Answer

The converse of infidelity: being accused of cheating when you've done no such thing.

Hellfireandcandy · Answer

Overspending, need to be able to keep to a budget

PaleDale · Answer

Getting satisfaction from porn and not your partner.

WonderingManII · Answer

For me relationships never get started cause the women around me, look down on me. And they are rude to me.

Anonymous · Answer

For me the biggest one is having kids, if the man doesn't want kids period than it's a no go for me. If I he's not willing to have them by the time im 30 (4 years) than no thanks

MySunflowerSophia · Answer

Being a Lazy Bum or not knowing how to do Taxes.

blackeagle007 · Answer

Loud, lots of male friends. Hypocritical, doesn’t want to work. Too traditional

Sugar100 · Answer

Someone that don’t want to meet parents

Agape93 · Answer

Being controlling or jealous

sawno · Answer

Dishonesty, attacking when angry, etc.

slatyb · Answer

A red hat.

Ironic_Method · Answer

Lying is a big one. Getting out of shape. Smoking.

Staximus · Answer

Hard drugs, too much drama, lying

Oldschool1981 · Answer

Infidelity isn't a deal breaker for me.

Johtolol98 · Answer

being cruel towards me

Jennz6 · Answer

Smoking 🚬 and other addictions

Sluttt · Answer

2 shitty people make a shit. Nothing new

KittygosMeoWW · Answer

Lying and abuse

Anonymous · Answer

I'm not into passive/submissive girls.

Anonymous · Answer

Omg bonquisha y'all really live up to the stereotypes

Alex-Snow · Answer

Not being honest with each other

Renegade_Sailor · Answer

Being a raging leftist political nut job.

Danny_dan92 · Answer

Infidelity is the only one

dougeats · Answer

bad breath and rotting teeth

Christyz · Answer

I guess I never had any disagreements

Evolutionf · Answer

No respect for the male gender

MrZameer · Answer

There's many things,

beenherebefore · Answer

Lying.

Anonymous · Answer

Leftist

BDRick · Answer

Having a pe*is

Anonymous · Answer

I don't know

What are your biggest deal-breakers in a relationship beyond the obvious like infidelity?

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What are your biggest deal-breakers in a relationship beyond the obvious like infidelity?

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