My girlfriend blocked me from seeing her instagram stories before we got together. How can I ask her to unblock me now without being awkward?

[ProbablyClueless]

Alright, this was caused by a nice and stupid situation that I don't really want to go into.

The SparkNotes version of the story is that sometime in the months before we started dating, my girlfriend blocked me from seeing her stories on Instagram. This wasn't caused by anything I did or even anything in particular at all. It was caused by a life circumstance that has since been resolved.

My girlfriend doesn't know that I know I was blocked. And I genuinely didn't know until fairly recently. I discovered this information by accident. However, she and I have a great rapport, so I'm assuming that she probably just forgot to unblock me.

This shouldn't be a big deal, but I also kind of feel like confronting someone about blocking you is kind of weird. It's not just "you blocked me." It's "I know you blocked me and hid it from me."

Any advice on how to go about having this conversation without making things weird?

[NathanDavis]

maybe don't tell her "you blocked me"

just say... "I can't see these stories of yours..."

and she will probably just unblock you, or tell you why she has you blocked from seeing them

but I actually don't know much or at all about Instagram stories so, who knows... not me, lol

[WonderingManII]

I hate social media for this very reason!

[ProbablyClueless]

Yeah, I’m not a fan either. There’s just too much weirdness. Such and so doesn’t want you seeing their post… okay, so now that begs the question of why.

And everyone treats their social media differently, so one person’s block could be the end of the relationship while another’s block is just what they do on a daily basis.

[WonderingManII]

Some people even consider following them on social media a form of stalking. Are you kidding me? Social media is for following! It's a type of communication to the whole world!

[ProbablyClueless]

Further compounded by the fact that the people who seem to drawn the most to social media are also the most unstable! 😂

Ayyayayay

[WonderingManII]

I think the biggest issue is "everyone treats their social media differently". There needs to be a rule made that tells everyone that you must treat social media by a law, so that everyone is on the same page.

[ProbablyClueless]

I'd be happy with rules of engagement being written on the platforms.

Want to be a public figure? Awesome, just know that now you don't get to permanently block people. You want to be public-facing, so now you have to deal with the public.

Want to only use your social media for family and friends? Awesome, but you should know that now people can't find your profile without your personal number.

[WonderingManII]

I know someone that invited people at work to follow her, and then when I did, she said she didn't feel comfortable with me following her. What on earth? I don't even know what I did wrong.

[ProbablyClueless]

That is really weird.

I would be so curious to know what happened there. Would it be appropriate in context to ask if you had done something to upset her?

[WonderingManII]

I can't tell you because I really don't know!

[ProbablyClueless]

How long ago did this happen?

[WonderingManII]

Just a few months ago.

[dustybiker2]

"Awkward Q. You blocked me on instagram before we were together. It was probably for good reason. Will you unblock me? I want to snoop in your past openly."

Own it. You'd be surprised how refreshing that is for other people. It builds trust.

[ProbablyClueless]

Honestly, that is a really good point that I didn't think of. And it's not even like she had me totally blocked, it was just from seeing her story updates.

I feel like I've been in so many toxic relationships that I forgot that it's normal for partners to be accountable to each other.

[dustybiker2]

Good luck. I'm betting you'll be stronger together for it.

[ProbablyClueless]

Thank you! Here’s hoping 😌

[Anonymous]

Yeah I wouldn't want a guy asking me to unblock something.

[ProbablyClueless]

I generally wouldn’t either! Blocking someone and then starting a relationship with them later is a special circumstance though

[Selene1600000]

Don’t frame it as a “confrontation,” because it wasn’t something she did to harm you and it’s not affecting your relationship now. If it matters to you, bring it up lightly like “hey I think I was hidden from your stories before no big deal, just curious if that was intentional or just old settings.” Then accept whatever she says without making it a bigger issue than it is.

[msc545]

I don't think there's really any point in having the conversation at all. If things are going well with the girlfriend and you want to keep them going that way, I think it's going to be probably necessary to just let this win go unless there is some compelling reason that you need to look at her Instagram stories. Even raising the issue is going to be problematic I believe. The very best battle of all and the best victory is the battle you don't have to fight.

[MrChinaski]

You don't get blocked accidentally. Leave her alone and move on.

[ProbablyClueless]

She ended up chasing me down to start a relationship. So this circumstance is odd

[WonderingManII]

@ProbablyClueless
I hoe things work out for you, but she sounds like a weird girl. I predict future problems.

[ProbablyClueless]

@WonderingManII Thank you! There's definitely some immaturity concerns with her, but I'm optimistic because I think she's more sheltered than immature (she is suuuuper traditional. Think of your classic good girl stereotype). This is a 30 year old woman who basically doesn't have any dating experience.

The vibe I'm getting is that she wants to be compliant but doesn't know what men want.

[Communicationisking]

Just ask her to unblock you from her spicy page