How do you suggest to a female friend that you want to change your friendship into a relationship without coming across as weird?

Question

OneViewpoint · Accepted Answer

Here's the manipulative approach. While you're hanging out but able to have a private conversation, tell her you've developed feelings for her. But you recognize that she only views you as a friend. And that's fine but, it's taking a toll on you. Tell her it's not healthy for you. Tell her this is goodbye. Give her a hug and disappear. No contact.

Let her experience the unexpected loss. Let her be the one with no control of the situation for a change. Let her stew on life without you. One of 2 things will happen.

1.) She admits to herself and you that she has feelings for you too.

2.) You never hear from her again. You were just a "friend zone backup boost for her ego and some easy validation.

Either way, you have your answer instead of perpetually wondering, "what is this". You can move on in life. And it was you pulling the trigger and taking control instead of sitting there stewing over it indefinitely. Sometimes people need to be kicked out of their comfort zone.

SotiCoto · Accepted Answer

You don't.
Funnily enough, while I normally suggest people talk through their problems, this is the sort of thing you can handle without words. You just try to be the bestest best awesome friend you can and spend as much time around her as possible... as if baiting her to be closer... but always draw a metaphorical line without explicitly saying anything. The trick is to get HER to cross the line. You have to bait her over it.
Make her want you. But she has to make the decision. It has to be her idea. THAT is the tricky part.

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

If she doesn’t like you back it’s going to be weird no matter what. Be prepared for the worst case scenario - including having to cut her off if she doesn’t reciprocate your feelings as it’s unfair to be just friends with someone you want something more with and the other way round for her too.

So what you need to do is ask her what she thinks about dating you. slatyb put it nicely, you could just say that.

Then she’ll respond: if she responds positively to the idea - she’s down - great. Now date lmao
if she does not seem keen about it, decide whether you want to stay friends with her and keep things as is or move on from her. This depends on whether you think you can be friends with someone you want to be romantically involved with. There’s no problem in telling her you can’t do that -it’s your decision.

beenherebefore · Accepted Answer

Read the room first. Do you feel that she might feel the same way about you? If yes, be honest about it tell her you've grown feelings for her and would like to know if those feelings are mutual. If she says yes, great. If she says no, tell her to forget about what you said.

But most importantly, before saying anything think if it's really worth ruining a friendship because there's that risk.

Love Doctor Brad · Accepted Answer

Just diving into the world of relationship dynamics here! To transform that friendship into something more, sprinkle in a little flirtation magic. Your aim is to communicate your feelings honestly but lightly. Next time you're hanging out, share how you feel in a relaxed tone. Something like "You know, spending time with you always highlights how awesome you are, and I've been feeling like there's potential for more between us. What do you think?" Just be genuine and confident, and let the sparks fly! 💫💕

YourFutureEx · Answer

You cannot escape the friendzone. The only time it's possible is when the feeling is secretly mutual to some extent. Sometimes even women like you more than just friends but they don't tell you because either they're shy/afraid or they want you to take charge.

Even in that case, you do not explicitly tell her that you like her more than friends. You can try flirting with her and she will get the hint about where the things are going and get mentally prepared. If she's into it, she'll reciprocate and you guy will start acting like you're in a relationship without any confession taking place.

BadApple69 · Answer

Honesty is the best policy. Just tell her how you feel. This is a game you will either win or lose and it doesn’t matter how you play the game the results will be the same. So just tell her and see what happens.

alli-112 · Answer

Literally just ask her out on a date. (And please be clear that it is a date, there is nothing worse than showing up to a hang-out and finding out that that's not what's happening.)

Miristheiss · Answer

There is NO WAY to make a romantic overature and to put yourself out there without any of the risk of rejection.  You just have to push fear away and GO FOR THE THINGS YOU WANT IN LIFE.

slatyb · Answer

"How would you feel about dating me?" That's not weird.

fonduegirl · Answer

If you want to avoid being creepy, be direct. 8/10 times the answer is negative, but it's worth a try

BriGinny · Answer

“Would you like to become more than friends and become my girlfriend?” .

Emmytexrex · Answer

If she already sees you as friends then she can't understand do that magically bro  I have done such and she was like I can never like you I said ok but we are still cool but not as before

Anonymous · Answer

The way we used to do it was to sit and talk with her and ask if she'd go steady with you. Or just ask her if she'd be your girlfriend.
You kids today are so retarded I have no clue how YOU'D go about doing it!

Anonymous · Answer

It will change literally everything. Make sure you are willing to lose her completely.

Staximus · Answer

I would not do that unless she is obviously attracted to you

Anonymous · Answer

I don't know, most of the girls I like friend-zoned me.

Anonymous · Answer

If you're 99% sure she feels the same way then confess. If not walk away from the idea and the friendship if necessary.

NathanDavis · Answer

it is going to be weird... regardless

lostghost · Answer

Generally they say no

How do you suggest to a female friend that you want to change your friendship into a relationship without coming across as weird?

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