Why doesn’t my ex want to be friends?

[Anonymous]

My ex and I moved from her home on the West Coast to the East Coast to start my residency. During this time, I fell in love with one of my colleagues who is also in the program. I ended things with my ex and began an official relationship with my now girlfriend and things are great. The only thing is, my ex doesn’t want to be friends and avoids us (we are in the same social circle).

She has blocked me on everything and has taken a step back from our friend group. She seems to be doing fine, according to LinkedIn (before she blocked me on there too) she received a promotion at work and will be starting an MBA program in the Fall. On the rare occasion that we are in the same setting, it’s awkward. She’s polite, but gives me the cold shoulder and isn’t particularly engaging with my girlfriend and I. I’ve asked if we could talk multiple times and she keeps refusing.

I don’t understand why we can’t be friends (especially since we have mutual friends).

[RavVid]

That is a shame you can't have cosy dinners for three.

Being a little more realistic she followed you from one side of the country to the other only to be cheated on. OK you accidentally fell in love with the new girl but clearly you negotiated a relationship deal with the new girl if you kicked the prior girl to the curb.

Not surprising she hates your guts and hates the new girlfriend guts too.

Don't understand why you don't understand.

Your friend group probably understands.

[Asker]

Do you think I deliberately meant to fall in love with my girlfriend while in the middle of a long term relationship? Things happen and people grow apart (while others grow together).

I still don’t understand why we can’t be friends, especially since we have mutual friends. Just because I fell out of love with her doesn’t mean that I don’t care about her as a person.

[RavVid]

No I'm not suggesting you deliberately fell for the new chick. People feel attraction for others all the time but we ought to shut those feelings down as soon as we feel them.

You're the winner because you exited with a new partner whereas she exited as the loser. It would be surprising if she wasn't bitter..

I daresay mutual friends will distance themselves from this. You can leave how they manage it to them,

[Finchie40]

Because you betrayed her and broke her heart by dumping her for someone else , Would you want to stay friends’ with a girl that dumped you for another guy that was screwing her brains out? LOL

[thebiz]

I can't believe you're that confused that you felt the need to ask here. It's one thing to see your ex with a new partner, but it's a whole other thing to see your ex with a partner they fell in love with WHILE with you. You at the very least emotionally cheated on her, if not physically, after she moved across the entire country for you. Who wouldn't feel awkward and bitter? I would not want to be friends with you or the other woman either.

[Gwendoline]

If I've read this right you are asking why your ex who left her life and moved with you to be with you while you start your new career doesn't want to be friends after you cheated on her and dumped her for a new woman and doesn't want to know your new girlfriend? Also is blocking you from stalking her on social media?

[AI Opinion]

Oh, sweet summer child, breakups can be quite the rollercoaster! 🎢 Your ex might need space to heal and create her own love story, especially if you fell for someone else in the midst. Blocking you is her way of protecting her heart. Even though you're ready to be friends, she might not be there yet, and that's okay. Give her time; respect her space. She needs to focus on her fabulous journey, including that MBA adventure! 💼 Stay fabulous in love with your new flame and let your ex find her groove too. 💖

[MannMitAntworten]

I refuse to be friends with my exes. Perhaps she feels the same. Honor her wish and to not be friends a leave her be. You made your choice yo pursue someone else. That was your choice. It wasn’t hers. Regardless whether you share the same friend circle, you made your bed.

[Nikki1989]

Some people are just assholes by nature.

I will never understand how people can't be friends with exes.

[astralpro300]

did you some how upset her

[Anonymous]

Might be awkward for her