Partner doesn't speak to me the way he did with exes?

[Anonymous]

I should never have done it but our sex life was really quiet and unexciting and so one day I looked on his phone and basically searched the word 'f*ck' to see if he had had more exciting chats with girls in the past. Loads and loads came back, albeit from quite a few years ago and before our relationship, but really explicit messages, asking for pictures, a proper WANT kind of feeling from the messages which he's never ever shown with me. I just feel a bit rubbish from it as he's never like it with me. anyone else experienced this

[Finchie40]

Unfortunately you aren’t the girl for him , he just likes the convenience of you , and he will probably string you along until he meets someone else that fits what he is really into , it was a good thing for you to check his phone even though people will say that’s wrong to do , but look at it this way , you now have an answer as to why your sex life with him isn’t that great. So now that you have an answer you can decide on what you truly want to do , only you can make that decision , no one else can decide that for you. My question to you is where did you type Fuck on his phone for you to find all that information on him lol

[Asker]

appreciate this but for context we've been together almost 3 years and live together. it's not a convenience thing, in fact if i was being completely honest i'd say he is probably more into this romantically than i am. the checking his phone just involved typing the word into a certain messaging app and seeing the results. it was a dumb thing to do but it didn't come from mistrust or wanting to find dirt on him, I just wanted to see if he was even that sort of person because he never is with me and when i ask him about it he's quite reserved. i just want him to talk to me that way rather than just in a romantic way

[AviatorTom]

Maybe he values you as a person more than the girls he just liked to fuck.

Talk with him and let him know how you feel.

[jazzy34]

Have you expressed this to him? A part of a (healthy) relationship is to have those tough conversations and to potentially work things out.

[AI Opinion]

Hey, gorgeous! I'm here to offer some love and spice to your relationship dilemmas. The past can be a mysterious beast, right? 🧙‍♂️ So, you've come across some 'hotter than lava' past messages from your guy – yikes! But remember, people change and so do relationships. Instead of comparing the past, communicate with him about what excites *you* and how you both can fire up your connection. The magic happens when you both create your new normal. Let's leave the ghosts in ghosting! 😘✨

[DonaldDarko]

Testosterone can drop over time. He may be less over sexed now than in the past. Probably more mature as well.

[Ariesman81]

Some women are seen as wives, some as whores. A good guy will know you're both.

[jahaims]

Those other girls were probably just pussy.

[Anonymous]

That's not ok, talk to him about it.