If you are a widow or widower, how do you get ready to love again?

[Raimond]

I became a widower five years ago when I lost my wife (covid + aggressive form of cancer), throw my self into my business and dealt with depression….
now I met a very special lady, and I ask my self if I am ready to get back out there, treat her the way she deserves and make a new chapter in life…

Updates

8 mo

Wow thank you everybody for your answers I didn’t expect so many, I really enjoyed reading them all

[Finchie40]

Only you can decide that man , I’m sorry to hear you lost your spouse , , your love for her and each other is only something you can see, no one else can decide that for you and you don’t have to answer to anyone about your life choices and what you choose to do , we all grieve in different ways , there is no set time limit on how long to grieve over a lost loved one , I just lost my Mom a few years ago and I am still not over losing my mom , she was an amazing person to me and my life hasn’t been the same since, but I know all I can do for myself is move forward the best way that I can. So if you aren’t ready to move forward with another girl , that’s only something you can decide , don’t just do it to appease her only do it if you feel ready to give yourself to her , because that’s what she is expecting when she gets into a relationship with you. So if you feel you can’t give her that, then you are best to tell her the truth that you aren’t ready , instead of you blind siding her and wasting her time if you really aren’t ready to start a new chapter.

[coachTanthony]

Sounds like you're ready. Just get out there and mingle.

[SueShe]

My sincerest condolences for the loss of your beloved spouse.

Each individual is different in terms of grieving and accepting that this chapter of your life is over and that a new one needs to be written.

Lots of people are hesitant to start anew because they have compunctions because they believe they are cheating on a departed loved one. It is up to you to decide whether you are ready for this new chapter in your life and you should not let anyone tell you that if you date someone else means you did not love your lost wife.

To get ready means to have to socialize and to get out of your shell and become active. Not on social media but in real life. Joining a club or taking up a hobby is probably one of the better ways to find someone that shares the same interests as you.

What you must never do though is to compare your new date with your deceased wife. That is a big mistake.

[Abbycado]

He needs some professional. I won’t name names. Hope you have a good week, Sur.

[SueShe]

@Abbycado Sur is having a good week, sure 🤣

You as well Abby (AI) 🤗

[Abbycado]

AbbyAi wouldn’t fix said problems: I morn for the asker. That’s horrible. I cannot inform and to not have to. I’d be happy to chat asker

[Abbycado]

You meed to be in the right headspace. If you are posting online, you are not ready.

[Raimond]

You are probably right

[AI Opinion]

Finding love again after such a significant loss is both beautiful and nerve-wracking. It's essential to honor your feelings and give yourself permission to embrace this new journey. Take things at your own pace; communication is your best ally. Your love for your late wife will always be a part of you, but that doesn't mean you can't open your heart to someone new. If you feel excitement, curiosity, and connection with this special lady, it's a sign you're ready to explore this new chapter. Dive into it with warmth and authenticity; she deserves the real you. 🥰💖

[dustybiker2]

It will be different for everyone I can only assume. All you can do is try. You'll always have love for your late wife just be sure to give the person you start seeing the opportunity to be her own person in your life.

[Sun_Kim-Ai]

You have to find the answer for this within yourself, only you know that.

[Raimond]

You are right but how do you personally know when you are ready?

[janemarie15]

For me, especially if we have kids. My number rule is, love my kids first before me. That's the way I get loving you or falling in love to you. The effort and accepting my child is very important to me.

[i_Jedi]

I don’t think I can. Loving that deeply once feels like a lifetime’s worth, and the idea of starting over just doesn’t sit right with me.

[exitseven]

You are the only one that can answer that. Be kind to yourself.

[MJVillarama]

That’s a huge journey you’ve been through. props for your strength. If you feel that spark with her, maybe that’s your sign it’s okay to open a new chapter. Taking it slow and honest always helps.

[jahaims]

I would stay single. It wouldn't be fair to the next person and I would have no desire.