I feel like I’m parenting my relationship, what do I do?

[urevdi]

Hi,

My boyfriend and I have been dating for about 8 months, and I’ve started noticing an imbalance in our relationship. I feel like I have more experience and maturity than he does, and it’s reaching a point where I’m making decisions most of the time—big or small—and managing how he feels emotionally. I often have to prompt him to make choices, and I’m starting to feel exhausted by this.

I want an equal partnership, not to feel like I’m parenting my boyfriend. I know he asked me for patience, but the way he worded it—telling me to treat him like a kid—made me feel frustrated. I really want us to find a way to balance things so we can both contribute equally to the relationship.

[HollyK21]

I would let him go. Breaking up wouldn’t normally be my first suggestion but this guy has some real growing up to do and things to unlearn. He’s at a place in his life where he wants to be mothered, and relationships aren’t meant to be that way, you are partners.

[lightbulb27]

Talk to him about that.

He needs to grow up, he sounds emotionally not mature.

It will take focus, repetition, encouragement and support for him to grow. It may be he's been ridiculed for decisions by others or just didn't have the opportunity to make them in the family. Maybe you are being overbearing in the decisioning.

we don't know, you'll have to explore. It's a good and unique issue brought to this site.

[WhitneySnow]

You need a more mature partner. Maybe therapy for him would help.

[AI Opinion]

Hey love! First things first, relationships should feel like a partnership, not a parent-child dynamic. 🚸 It's amazing that you want an equal partnership, because that’s where the magic happens. Consider starting an open and honest conversation with him about how you're feeling. It’s crucial to set boundaries and express that mutual decision-making is key. Encourage him to step up, and explore ways he can contribute more proactively. Balancing the scales might take some time, but it’s totally worth it if both parties are willing to put in the work. 🌟

[LiamS95]

get out of that relationship