Am I emotionally cheating on my boyfriend if I have a little crush on a coworker?

Question

Ever since my boyfriend went to a strip club when we were broken up i don’t know why I think of someone else while kissing him I really hate this and i dont know how to change

ohsheeT · Accepted Answer

Maybe because you're not meant to change, maybe because that moment on his birthday, he went out with his friends and did not ask you to go, that does something to you, that should do something to you? And it should make you think this is what he thinks of me this is Who he is? He doesn't want me to be around him and his friends. You should think about that because what he did was wrong. It shows you how much he truly loves you. He does it , and you know that down deep It's the same thing with a lie. The first time somebody tells a lie in the relationship , it's the beginning of the downhill All the little things that have happened to you since you've been in that relationship, those things are telling you something and you know, down deep that you have to make a choice, do I want this type of person in my life? Do I want this person to treat me like this and tell me that he loves me. That's not love and see you know this. That's
 Why you feel the way you feel about this other guy? Because he treats you right, you get along.
 And you know the your relationship that you're in right now is not right? And you know, down deep, that's the truth, so you're just, it's going to happen sooner or later, you're going to walk away someday guaranteed. You just have to make sure that if you're going after another guy that he is truly what you want , otherwise , it'll be better just to walk away and get out of the situation that you're in , because , you know as well as I know that's wrong

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

It’s possible you have some resentment toward him for going to a strip club. Even though the two of you were separated, maybe you’re thinking how could he move on that fast to checking out other women. So there may be some detachment, distrust there from him because of that that you’re seeking in someone else. Chances are you’re thinking am I not enough, does he like these women more than he likes me. So because of those thoughts, maybe it’s driving you to seek validation from someone else. The brain also tends to crest a defense mechanism by cresting a crush on someone else when someone feels hurt or unsure about their partner. And the relationship might not feel the same anymore.

MontBlanc · Accepted Answer

Having a little crush on someone doesn’t automatically mean you’re emotionally cheating.

Thoughts can happen naturally, but what matters is how you act on them.

If you maintain boundaries, stay honest with yourself, and don’t let it interfere with your relationship, it’s just a normal human feeling.

Emotional cheating usually involves sharing intimate thoughts or feelings with someone outside the relationship in a way that crosses trust.

Flower7 · Accepted Answer

How did you find out that he went to a strip club?

Love Doctor Brad · Accepted Answer

I’m here on GAG to decode messy love feelings and give it to you straight, cutie 💋

A small crush isn’t emotional cheating by itself, but feeding it is a red flag. Your mind went there because trust was cracked when he went to the strip club. Try to process that hurt first. Limit mental fantasies about the coworker, refocus on your boyfriend, and ask yourself if you still feel safe and desired in this relationship.

coachTanthony · Answer

Nature gives us opportunities to be attracted to as many people as possible in order to procreate. It's up to us though to decide once we found that one person we love to admonish those other opportunities that will keep coming at us and won't stop ever.

Finchie40 · Answer

If you are investing your time into the coworker , then yes you are emotionally cheating on your boyfriend, if you aren’t investing your time into the coworker, then you are not cheating , you just have a crush like most people do , when they find someone else attractive , it’s only cheating if you act on it meaning you are flirting with him and giving him hints that you are attracted to him , which can make him want you as well

Anonymous · Answer

If you have a crush on a coworker, that doesn't mean your cheating. I think if you act on it, then it could be a problem. I personally think if you two were broken up, it doesn't matter whether he kissed someone else, or went to a strip club, or not. he's free to do what he wants, as are you. If you werent together now, and you have a crush on your coworker, if you made a move it wouldn't be considered breaking any boundaries.

I would look at it as: "Has he gone to a strip club while we are together? Does he respect our boundaries within the construct of our relationship?"

Crankor · Answer

Its the start of it yes. If you can't help yourself then you shouldn't put yourself in any situation you can't control yourself in. It also usually signifies there is something or some things lacking in your relationship that you desire to either have or try. Sounds like a good time to have some conversation with your partner about things you like or dont like about each other maybe and or expectations n such

HighValue · Answer

Going to a strip club is unacceptable when in a relationship, and so is crushing on someone. Question, have you ever posted of left up provocative/revealing pictures on social media while in a relationship? Just curious because that IS cheating, and most women do it and think it is fine, yet get upset if their man even looks at someone at a club.

KennethNoisewater · Answer

Bruh…. You mad he went to a strip club when you were broken up? Thats top shelf crazy. Save the dude some heart ache and break up with him now instead of waiting a few months and cheating on him first. That’s inexcusable. You really have no say what he does when your broken up. To me, it sounds like you already made up your mind to cheat on him. Don’t do that to him. Break up now and save him.

RavVid · Answer

I think the truth is that while in a relationship we might have a fancy for someone else.

The answer to that is to shut it down. Say NO to yourself when you are imagining some one else.

Yes you are emotionally cheating.

slatyb · Answer

Maybe, it depends on whether it is taking time away from your relationship. What do you want? Why were you broken up? What has changed since then?

Staximus · Answer

You were broken up so it doesn't matter if he went to a strip club. You're making up stupid excuses in your mind for your unacceptable behavior.

genericname85 · Answer

loyalty is not about never having thoughts about other people. loyalty is about having them but not acting ont hem.

Still-alive · Answer

so if this is an issue you can't get over you might need to end things and deal with that. let him go. you guys were broken up!

WonderingManII · Answer

No. Just ignore your crush, and eventually those feelings will go away.

LC75LC71 · Answer

Oh, good god. It's not cheating until things become physical. Flirting in person does count..

Daytoday79 · Answer

It happens to most people at one time or another, feel free to follow/dm me if you want to share

Nikki1989 · Answer

No, you are just being immature.

Drumlin2001 · Answer

Not cheating but it's weird.

TonyMetal___86 · Answer

In my opinion, you too should break up

Jeff51 · Answer

No but it will if you go further.

Anonymous · Answer

You seem female

Anonymous · Answer

Yes you are.

zombiewoof · Answer

Life happens

Hispanic-Cool-Guy · Answer

Yep..

Sammy098 · Answer

That's cheating

qwerty2469 · Answer

Yes.

Am I emotionally cheating on my boyfriend if I have a little crush on a coworker?

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Am I emotionally cheating on my boyfriend if I have a little crush on a coworker?

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