Who Should Come First: Your Partner, Your Children, or Your Parents?

Question

In life and in our priorities, who should come first: your partner, your children, or your parents?

How do you balance love, responsibility, and loyalty between the family you come from and the family you build?

** For me, before getting married, my parents came first, followed by my siblings

But after marriage, my mate becomes my priority, my children come after that not because I love them any less, but because one day they will grow up and build lives of their own.

The person who will walk beside me through life and stay with me until the end is my mate.

LazerBean · Accepted Answer

If there was not enough food to go around or something then of course the children would go first. But unless it's something of that nature then it is spouse, then children, then parents. That is the way my parents taught me and the way my husband's parents taught him. My husband has been with me since before we had children, and he will still be here after the children have moved on and made their own families. Parents are the foundation of a happy family. We believe that one of the best ways to teach and show our children stability is to give them an example of a husband and wife who care for each other and will always be there for each other.

One time I saw someone share a post that was something about how they felt like they were nobody's favorite person. The person who shared it was married, and a bunch of other married people had liked it and said that they felt the same way in the comments. Mostly older married people as well, not really any young married people. The type of post that my husband and I usually get together make fun of, but the amount of people who felt that sentiment does say something about many people's priority in marriage, in my opinion. I think if more couples would have prioritized their spouse rather than their kids or job or whatever, that wouldn't really be a thing.

Screenwriter · Accepted Answer

You have to take care of yourself first. Then you can help others in your life. When they're young, your children come second, because your adult mate can usually take care of themselves to a greater degree. Healthy adult parents don't need you much until they're older, and as you say, your adult children won't need you as much as your elder parents will.

It all depends on where you are in your life. But if you don't take care of yourself first, you cannot help or support anyone!

Sunrising · Accepted Answer

I don't think there is an order of who comes first parents, partner, or children, they all in my view are equally important.

I hope I will be spending more of my time with my partner, and my parents will have their lives, and my children will be finding their own partners, and having their own children.

But because I will probably be spending less time with my parents and children in future, doesn't make them less important.

Spencer10 · Accepted Answer

I think priorities do tend to shift during your lifetime but if i had to choose children always have to come first generally.

Love Doctor Brad · Accepted Answer

My aim on GAG is to help you untangle messy love dynamics without losing your mind… or your heart 😏

You nailed it. Before marriage, parents and siblings are the core. After marriage, your partner becomes your number one, then your kids, while still respecting your parents.

The couple is the foundation. If that collapses, the whole family structure feels it. Prioritizing your partner doesn’t mean loving your kids less, it means giving them a stable, loving home. That’s not selfish, that’s emotionally mature and honestly… super attractive 🥰

KimmySchmit · Answer

Children first but you should always show your children that their father is too be respected

CupcakeTheDestroyer · Answer

In order from most to least important, it goes: myself, everyone else

Agape93 · Answer

My partner. I don't have kids and I would choose you over my family. And I never met you before.

msc545 · Answer

You should come first. If you don't. Take care of yourself. Nobody else is going to and you can't take care of anyone else.

Nikki1989 · Answer

My partner.

emeraldsaphire · Answer

Kids, then partner then parents.

Sunshinelips · Answer

Children. You brought them into the world.

AngryCarl3 · Answer

Your partner, of course.

LC75LC71 · Answer

Given all 3, Parents still first.

Hispanic-Cool-Guy · Answer

Spouse comes first, then children then parents.

In_Trance · Answer

Partner Children Parents

Anonymous · Answer

Children always come first

jahaims · Answer

Children obviously

888theGreat · Answer

God should

Pterodon · Answer

My partner

Who Should Come First: Your Partner, Your Children, or Your Parents?

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For you, who comes first? Your children or your spouse?

Who Should Come First: Your Partner, Your Children, or Your Parents?

Most Helpful Opinions

AI Opinion

What Girls & Guys Said

For you, who comes first? Your children or your spouse?

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